Last Wednesday my auntie invited me out to eat at a Japanese restaurant for her son's 18th birthday dinner. Though Japanese food is far from my choice of foods, I went to the restaurant at the reservation time, and ordered one of the cheapest dinners on the menu. When the check came, it was sub-totaled for everyone there, and she hit me up for my part of the bill. Was that tacky and rude?
2007-05-15 13:45:15 · 20 answers · asked by DAVID C 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
it was only rude if she expressed that she was paying. Japanese restaurants tend to be more expensive than general dining experiences. Being invited to a party does not necessarily mean that your being asked out for a free meal. Ive never been the least bit upset when asked to pay for my own dinner. If i didn't have the money to cover a bunch of people than i too would ask people to pay their own way. Albeit id let them know ahead of time that it was dutch treat
2007-05-15 13:50:20 · answer #1 · answered by Amber W 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Maybe tacky, not necessarily rude. It depends on several factors, such as whether or not you've been to dinner with her before. That could establish some sort of pattern that would lead you to expect not to be hit up for part of the bill. Additionally, sometimes when we invite people out for dinner in a casual way, such as by saying something like, "Want to go grab a bite to eat?" we are not really communicating the intent to pay the whole bill for everyone. However, it is also possible to give the opposite impression. It depends on how she invited you.
This is one of those issues where there was probably a genuine misunderstanding rather than real rudeness. A good rule to follow would be to assume that you're going to pay unless the person inviting you clearly indicates otherwise. That way you won't be disappointed with the outcome.
2007-05-15 14:00:40 · answer #2 · answered by Dave S 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I do not expect the person who invited me to pay for my food if they invite me to a birthday dinner unless the person who invited me says its on the house. I ALWAYS expect to pay for my own food UNLESS I am the person being celebrated, and even THEN I'll plan on paying for my meal till someone tells me to put my wallet away.
I do not think it is tacky or rude. The check came, its time for you to pay up.
2007-05-16 02:04:01 · answer #3 · answered by Terri 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I always carry pocket money when I go out to a restaurant with someone, that way I`m not expecting them to pay. If they pay for my meal it`s a nice gesture, but I never assume they are going to pay. If it`s an expensive restaurant, then it`s almost certain that one person won`t foot your bill.
2007-05-16 11:32:22 · answer #4 · answered by lost2day 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
She should have explained to everyone that it was a dutch treat type of thing, and that the invitation didn't mean you were her guests.
I don't think it's rude to split a bill, but it's a bit thoughtless to not tell people what the expectations are ahead of time so they can plan.
2007-05-15 15:45:39 · answer #5 · answered by Lively 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would consider it rude in my opinion... I'd never do it. If there were a lot of people there I could understand better since that would be a huge bill. But when I'm on the same side of the situation as you are, I usually bring extra money and plan on paying for myself unless someone stops me and offers to pay. I do that with family, friends, parties, and used to do it on dates too. Just safer, and that way you don't feel too jipped when they don't pay for you.
2007-05-15 13:56:05 · answer #6 · answered by starsmoak 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Always assume that dining out means you'll be paying. You get invited to share the occasion and they shouldn't have to pay for your company. Just consider the cost of dinner as part of your gift, that you got to enjoy.
2007-05-15 13:57:14 · answer #7 · answered by Lillly 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It advance into maximum certaily rude and obscenely wasteful!! What have they completed to deserve 12 flamingoes!!! Im appalled which you would be able to waste 12 flamingoes on one backyard. At that fee you graced sixty one residences with TWELVE flamingoes and you had 3 left over!! this is surely ridiculous via fact you would be able to desire to have lavished 735 yards with one flamingo apiece! WASTEFUL! You dont deserve a single flamingo!! JERK!
2016-10-05 03:40:04 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because she invited you to attend the dinner does not mean she invited you to attend for free. Unless the host(ess) says they will be picking up the check, then it is DUTCH. That is a standard rule.
Besides, she is YOUR aunt...next time YOU pick up HER tab as a gesture of her status in your family...she is older.
2007-05-15 15:07:32 · answer #9 · answered by Seraphim B 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
not at all you should've order whatever you want it's a party enjoy it only once a year and just think it's part of the birthday gift have a heart the money will not follow you to the grave your relative is part of your life because someday when you need help you might be able to turn to them.
2007-05-15 13:52:03 · answer #10 · answered by @NGEL B@BY 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋