I just got my license,but there's a little problem.....?

Question

So I'm 16 and I got my license yesterday. My dad told me he was going to get me a car. Then that night I was talking about getting a car and my dads like..."ummm who said your getting a car." So I was like...you told me your going to get me one and he said well I stopped looking for one like three weeks ago b/c of your attitude and he says i need to be more responsible. In my eyes, I havent been being rude to him and I've tried real hard. I'm a good student and I get good grades. I have plenty of friends that have cars that don't desreve to have one. My dads just very diffecult. He also started telling me..."Well back in the day when I was a teen my parents wouldnt get me a car until I was 18." I have a boyfriend and he dosnt want me driving there whenever I please...which I won't!!! All I want to do is be more independent so I can drive myself to work and where ever I need to go. He that if he gets me a car its going to be his and I can only drive to work and school! It's not fair!!

Okay I allrwady have a jobbb!!!!!!

and on top of that he told me he would get me one and I'm paying for the insurance and gas!!!

and on top of that ppl are so cruel on this damn thing I'm not ******* whining and you don;t know me...I'm not a brat so shut your mouths and dont answer if you ahve nothing desent to say

Answer 1

Please tell me you are kidding, right?
When I was 16, I asked my parents for a car and they laughed at me.
And while I was sad then, I laugh now thinking of how ridiculous I must have sounded hwen I said, "Well, everybody else has a caaaar." Which was not true.
Grow up.

Answer 2

Listen closely then get over it... Father knows best!!

Fair? First of all, at any age, driving is a privilege not an honor. If abused, this privilege can be taken away and no one says they ( the drivers license bureau ) has to give it back. And accidents, under 18, may ( and probably will ) increase your insurance premium. Then ole dad will be left holding the bag for you and you'll feel awful, if you're still around to feel anything. So try asking yourself these questions instead of someone who doesn't know the real truth. I'm not saying that you're a liar but I think you see my point.
However, at today's fuel and insurance prices, I think I'd let dad buy my way for a couple of more years and be contented with driving his car. In the meantime, prove to him, by keeping your word, that you can be trusted with the responsibility ( as a driver ) of owning and maintaining a car. Also, try working a part time job to help pay for your expenses. Maybe then he'll see that you are really trying and change his mind.
Good luck!!

Answer 3

Who died and made you "boss"?
You want a car-use your pay and buy one.
You want someone else to buy you a car, pay your insurance and gas, and then not have any control over it? Why?
You are a child. Sorry.
You don't like the rules, then don't ask for favors.
You want someone else to give you something-you have to play by the rules. If it hinges on your good attitude and good grades, then you better get good.
Quit whining, and be grateful he can even AFFORD To consider helping you out. Maybe he resents your attitude that you are owed this freedom, this vehicle, your independence. Sorry, you don't.
Your dad does not OWE you a car. You don't HAVE to have one. You will not die for lack of a car.
What is FAIR about asking someone else to buy you dangerous, expensive toys and then you can do whatever you want with them?
YOU are not being fair. You are being an ungrateful, spoiled teenager.
And your boyfriend doesn't want you hanging around where he is? Sounds like you are a pain in the but.
You need to get a life- and quit whining about fairness. See how you can help someone else.

Answer 4

Life is not fair. He's trying to teach you that. Maybe have a heart to heart talk w/him & tell him you are going to be responsible w/the car & the places you drive to. I personally think he's bluffing. Like....he's letting you think he's not looking...but secretly he is....and just wants you to be surprised, not expecting it. Be patient. Don't let him know that it is upsetting you right now. I bet you will be pleasantly surprised.
**Wow, a lot of hateful responses. I saw that you wrote you have a job. that's an awesome start. I feel like you are responsible.....and having a car would be nice...but you can't be upset if he's telling you he's not going to get you one. I got a car...it wasn't fancy....it was a piece of junk....but it was something to drive. I was a sophomore in High School at the time & i had to get to & from work some how.** hang in there, keep proving to him that you are worthy. good luck to you!

Answer 5

Okay, you need to chill. If you react badly, you are proving his point.
Any parent will tell you having a child drive is a really scary thing. It's easy for young drivers to get distracted with music or a cell phone or friends in the car and without the benefit of experience, they are less likely to respond well and avoid an accident. (See note.)
The extra car and insurance are expensive. And frankly, once you are driving, they will get less face time with you.
Note: Okay, you can only get experience by driving.
So here is the plan. You say you are a good student and respondsible. Sit down with your dad and say, "I understand you have concerns. I want to show you that I can be respondsible."
Have a pen and paper handy and ask what he wants to see from you to show you are adult enough to trust with a car. Write down his list and post it in your room so he can see you are trying to meet his criteria.
Ask him to show you basic car care--how to fix a flat tire and jump a dead battery. That way, you can show you are less likely to get stranded.
Offer to help maintain the family car voluntarily by washing it and vaccumming out the interior regularly. Ask to drive when you are going places together with him driving shotgun, so that he can see you are managing traffic and finding your way around town.
Don't press him about the car, show him you are trying to do what he asked. Give it a month or so and sit him down and ask how you are doing. Repeat if need be.
In the meantime, ask him what sort of car he has in mind for you, or what sort of budget is available. You can be looking on-line or in the paper. If you find something that meets his criteria, naturally it is only respondsible to bring them to his attention.
It may be a few months before he relents, but you can best win your case by doing your best to be the grown-up here. Worst case, you can get a job and start saving money toward buying your own car.

Answer 6

You won't appreciate a car that is given to you if you haven't worked for it. Work for it. Be respectful and change your attitude. You are a little whiny, big deal you don't get a car the day after you got your license. There are kids all over that would like something to eat and they can't because there is no money for food or a roof over their heads. Think about what is really important!

Answer 7

Hmmm... I see your problem. My sister (18) just got her car too. Here's what you can do: In a calm voice explain to him this:

You can drive any younger siblings to school (if you have any)
You can drive yourself to school and work (duh)
You can also drive yourself to other places like the mall so you won't have to ask or bother him
You can also mention (though I wouldn't) that things have changed since he was 18.
Remind him of your good grades and lack of disciplinary problems
Ask him exactly what he felt your attitude toward him was, and then, whenever you speak to him you can keep yourself in line. (ex. How did you feel my attitude toward you lately has been? [Listen, nod, and wait until he's finished explaining to you. Don't take it all defensively, take the criticism and learn from it.])

Remember: Don't start sentences with accusatory words. Start with things like: "I feel that..." or something like that. Whining, screaming, and temper tantrums certainly won't help.

But, above all, DON'T ASK AFTER WORK. Try to talk to him in a calm environment (like not at a restaurant, that just SPELLS disaster) and make sure you keep all your attention on him.

If this doesn't work, start saving. :(

Answer 8

It is fair. You are only 16 and you must follow your parent's rules. This is what he means when he's talking of your attitude. It seems to me you want things your way. Well, you can't have it your way. Get yourself together and show your dad some respect, then maybe he will start looking again. We go through the same thing with our 15 year old. You guys don't realize when you have crossed the line sometimes.

Answer 9

Just bring it up to your dad in a respectful manner. Ask him how I need to be more responsible and respectful. Acknowledge his wishes, cause ultimately he is buying a car for you. Then for the next few weeks go above and beyond about being responsible and respectful. He will notice this and see how hard you are trying to succeed. Then have the talk with him again and see where he stands on the subject. More than likely you will have a better foot to stand on in the later conversation!

Answer 10

Yes it is fair, it is your dads money so you cant be upset at him. Dont worry about what everyone else is getting especially since you are only 16, you are still a child. Enjoy yourself and stop trying to grow up so fast. Enjoy the time you have left under your parents because once you leave you might not enjoy all the responsibility you are trying to take on at such a young age.

Answer 11

Learn how to fricken spell, good student.

As to your rantings:

1) What your friends have or don't have, do or don't do, get or don't get, does not in any way reflect on what you should have, do, or get. As a friend's mother used to tell him, "If your friends got a daily beating, then would you want one, too?".

2) How you view your behavior towards your father is exactly as you state; in your eyes. I would suggest you look beyond your point of view to gain more perspective so you might better understand your father's hesitation to present you with a car of your own.

3) Your father isn't required to give you anything beyond food, clothing and a place to live. Anything more you might receive is MORE. So if you receive the basics, then you are being treated fairly. If you are being giving more, even if it isn't as much as you would like it to be, then you are being treated more than fairly.