When my bf and I met a few years ago I was 6 kg lighter, now he says that he doesn't find me attractive anymore and that it affects him. He cries about it, finds it difficult to sleep with me, etc.
I think he is over-reacting, but we've been through a lot and this is the only thing that I just can't cope with. He gets really cold sometimes and pushed me away.
2007-05-15 09:15:35 · 24 answers · asked by Wednesday 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He shouldnt be treating you that way...
Guys are really visual though, so I think that it bothers him that you arent taking care of yourself as much as you used to. I dont think it will work if he wants you to be in shape, and feel okay where you are...
I guess you need to tell him how you feel and try to work it out that way... sorry! Otherwise, find a guy who wants to be with you the way that you are...
2007-05-15 09:19:18 · answer #1 · answered by Marie Catherine 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think he's over-reaching too ... but ask yourself this, "If I truly love him ... don't I want him to be happy? If I lost the weight ... would he be happy? ... " It sounds more like he just doesn't have the drive and longevity to sustain an INTIMATE relationship. More men are having this problem (I've nicknamed them "One-Time Wonders"). The best way to fix this is to walk away before you're completely invested ... SOMETIMES the men just want a higher challenge and your high standards will help him jump higher to be satisfied. Work more on the inside of your beauty than outside!!!
-------- ------- ---------
I am beautiful
No matter what they say
Words can't bring me down
I am beautiful
In every single way
Yes, words can't bring me down
Oh no
So don't you bring me down today
To all your friends, you're delirious
You're so consumed
In all your doom, oh
Trying hard to fill the emptiness
The pieces gone
Left the puzzle undone
Is that the way it is
'Cause you are beautiful
No matter what they say
Words can't bring you down
Oh no
'Cause you are beautiful
In every single way
Yes, words can't bring you down
Oh no
So don't you bring me down today
No matter what we do
(No matter what we do)
No matter what we say
(No matter what we say)
We're the song inside the tune
(Yeah, oh yeah)
Full of beautiful mistakes
2007-05-15 09:34:07 · answer #2 · answered by Giggly Giraffe 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think there is more going on then your weight gain that is upsetting him. You two need to sit down and talk about what's really going on. While 23 may be on the heavier side, his reaction to it does seem a bit much. The sooner you have a conversation, the sooner you'll figure out what's really bothering him.
2007-05-15 09:21:42 · answer #3 · answered by osmun79 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
whatta a insulting **** if he doe like u 4 wot u are kick him 2 da kerb hun men supposed 2 love u 4 who u are god youve only putta bit ov wait on 4 crying out loud tell him 2 get a reality check jees! and as 4 crying over it he needs 2 get a life beauty is skin deep if he cant handle a real women tell im 2 go and get a bird wol put up wit his strange beaviour go out wid ya girly mate av cat 2 ya mum and start luking 4 love again tis surely aint ealty 4 your relationsip tell im u wont a real man wo can andle a real women u carnt carry dis big baby u go out and ave sum girly fun get sum self asteem and ya self respect bk on track and leave tis loser 2 find is own way in life wot an insulting pig gudluk un b strong e needs 2 get a reality check leave im 2 it x
2007-05-15 09:30:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry sweetheart but he sounds really shallow- you should be asking if you really want someone who can't love you for all the other beautiful qualities that you exude. Maybe he needs some kind of counselling but i sure would have told him where to go by now and found someone who loved me for what i am and not what he wants me to be.
Libs
2007-05-15 09:21:19 · answer #5 · answered by Ellie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's being a fussy, immature little boy! 23 is a perfect BMI and he should really be able to see past what you look like anyway. If he doesn't understand this and doesn't understand that you love him, then he's not worth it, babe.
2007-05-15 09:20:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A BMI of 23 is not very heavy. There must be more to your boyfriend's problem than this.
2007-05-15 09:59:05 · answer #7 · answered by alan P 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the fact that he is so obsessed over it that you actually know your bmi is a bad sign. he is obviously just with you for your looks regardless of what you may think about it. i say get out fast because he is lowering your self esteem and no one deserves that. he should love you and want you for who you are, not some ideal weight. leave this loser.
2007-05-15 09:20:28 · answer #8 · answered by Bobby L 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get rid of him! You need someone who's going to love you exactly the way you are....I gained some weight when I moved in with my bf and he still tells me he loves every curve of my body. If you're healthy...that's all that matters.
2007-05-15 09:24:11 · answer #9 · answered by Rachel-Pit Police-DSMG 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you're young move on. I've been married 25 years and now find it impossible to move on. If he's not giving you what you want make a possitive decision now and don't end up like me regretting it.
2007-05-15 09:22:01 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋