Me and my boyfriend are getting married. The best man who is also my brother and my boyfriends best friend refuses to wear a suit or a tux. This is my boyfriend's first time getting married and my 2nd time I have never worn a wedding dress and I want to. We are planning on a church wedding my boyfriend wants the tux and wedding dress the whole 9 yards but my brother refuses to wear a tux.My boyfriend want everyone to look nice he thinks it would look stupid if everyone was dressed nice and we have the best man in a t-shirt and jeans what do we do?
2007-05-15 06:10:59 · 24 answers · asked by txcowgrl8575 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Get a new best man?!
It's your wedding and he should wear what you want him to wear.
2007-05-15 06:14:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
My initial reaction would be what everyone else is saying- it's your day, and if he's being a baby about getting into a tux for a couple hours, then screw him! But, if you don't want to be as hard about it, and I understand that the confrontation will be unpleasant; maybe you can start a conversation with him as to what his reasoning is for refusing to wear a tux. I can't think of any valid reasons for him to refuse, but- he may have one.
I think that if he's going to be pig-headed about it, you should explain to him why you want to have the church wedding, and how it's important to the people who are involved in it to be supportive of that choice. Let him make the decision to either be in the wedding and wear a tux, or not be in the wedding, and wear whatever he wants. I know this is hard, but if you are able to discuss your feelings and communicate how important this is to you, maybe it won't have to get to the point of asking him to step down from being the best man. Good luck- and stick to your guns!! This is you and your fiance's day!!
2007-05-16 07:02:58 · answer #2 · answered by slcfirekitten 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he does not respect your wishes and how big this day is for you it does not seem that he respects you much at all. Is this really the type of person you want to stand up as best man in your wedding? I would give him an ultimatum. If he will not wear the tux to make you happy you will have to ask someone who will. He only has to wear the whole thing during the wedding. At the reception he can take off the jacket and roll up the sleeves. After all, this is YOUR day not his. Best of luck!
2007-05-15 07:21:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
be firmed about your decision,. explain to your brother that nothing in the world would make you happier than having him be best man at your wedding. but since this is a formal affair and the whole wedding party will be deck out to the mack, that it would be embarrasing to your future husband and guest if your brother would not act his age and wear a tux like the rest of the wedding party. if he still does not want to wear a tux tell him that if he does not want to go with the rest opf the party that it leaves you no choice but to get someone else to be the best man. \
there might be another reason why he is being so rebelous about the whole tux thing. talk to him. ask him why he is being the way he is.
2007-05-15 06:32:12 · answer #4 · answered by lasalle_1986 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A white tux isn't a tux, it's 1970s prom attire. And if the wedding is in the evening, black is the most appropriate color. And note to Queen Queso: You're a little confused about the level of formality. White TIE is the height of "formal-ness". Black TIE is second. But they both go with a BLACK tuxedo.
2016-04-01 02:27:04 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your brother he needs to wear the tux if he wants to be in the wedding. Leave it up to him...say "If you want to be in this wedding you will wear a tux, if not then come and watch but you wont be in the bridal party" Put it on him and if he says no, then ok he's not in...tell your fiance to ask one of the other groomsmen to be his best man and don't stress over it :) If he is really your fiances best friend he would wear the suit. I mean really it's a matter of hours...
just my thoughts.
2007-05-15 06:20:56 · answer #6 · answered by legends_chick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your brother is being selfish and is jealous of the now much closer relationship you and his best friend are entering into.
Have fiance tell him thank you but he's decided that his dad or his own brother or someone else will be best man - unless he will wear the tux - for his friend and his sister and everyone else.
what an immature little man your brother is.
2007-05-15 06:27:29 · answer #7 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find another best man that's all you can do. If a best friend can't put aside the problem of wearing a tux at his sisters and best friends wedding then what kind of best friend or brother is he?
2007-05-15 06:18:48 · answer #8 · answered by Johnny 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
If the bestman won't or can't do what is expected of him for the wedding, he can be relieved of his duties. I would say that if he doesn't want to wear the tux, that's fine and you would still love for him to attend as a guest with the rest of your family.
Good luck!
2007-05-15 07:28:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Exclude him from the wedding party. If he cannot put his issues aside to honor your wishes as well as those of his best friend, then he does not deserve to be the best man. No matter how painful it may be, give him an ultimatum. No tux, no best man.
2007-05-15 06:27:52 · answer #10 · answered by John D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would explain to him that this was what I wanted. Give him an option of wearing a tux or sitting on the front row with family. I would remind him that you are his sister and his bestfriend is the groom. Play the guilt card.
2007-05-15 06:18:09 · answer #11 · answered by mamatucker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋