so my boyfriend and i were talking about sex and he said when we move in together if he wakes up in the middle of the night and wants to do it he will get me up and i said no i wont get up for that in a joking way and then he said well i will just have my way while ur sleeping if i have to and that made me mad because i said well what if i dont want it and he got all mad at me does any one else think its wrong for guys to do that
2007-05-14 08:45:54 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you've made it clear you don't want to be awakened for sex, then he needs to respect that. If you were okay with it, no problem.
It's never okay to force or coerce someone to have sex...and if I'd told someone NOT to wake me up in the middle of the night to fool around, and he did it anyway, he'd find himself sleeping on the floor or sofa.
No means no...someone who cares about you will respect your feelings on such issues.
2007-05-14 08:49:37 · answer #1 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well he was serious and you were joking that is where the problem started. You should have just let him know you were kidding. You shouldn't share the same bed with a man you are not willing to have sex with at any given time. But, definitely he is wrong for saying what he did. He basically said "I take you for granite and you will do what I want and when I want." I don't think he deserves to move in with you because he doesn't even respect what you want.
2007-05-14 15:53:52 · answer #2 · answered by ME 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all, Feisty is incorrect-it isn't rape and that word shouldn't be bantered about so causally-if he does wake you up in the middle of the night having sex with you and you allow him to continue and enjoy it, is it rape? I dare so no. Secondly, he seems a bit too insensitive for you. If he doesn't respect the sanctity of your person, he's not ready to move in with you or anyone else. Move on and find someone who understands that sex isn't about just getting off-it's about physical communication between two conscious people. If he likes having sex with the lifeless, tell him to move in with a cadaver.
2007-05-14 15:56:24 · answer #3 · answered by Black I 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um YES! Sex is consensual or it is rape. I mean seriously what a pig. I would NOT move in with him. I would wait a day or two and I would tell him it seriously bothered you and that you assumed he was joking...and then get confirmation that he was just joking about it. If he wasn't, then this is not the kind of guy you want to stay involved with.
2007-05-14 15:49:37 · answer #4 · answered by starbagoz19 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I totally think its wrong first of all his suppose to respect u no matter what especially in sex what i notice is that he is possessive and that's giving you a clue that not only in that his not respecting that decision even other things he wont respecting you really have to talk to him and make him understand that is wrong so yeah girl do what you got to do
2007-05-14 15:54:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well of course its wrong but i think he was kidding. But if he really did get mad then theres something wrong with him, and your relationship because all he obviously wants is sex. but i think he was just messing around and ure making a big deal out of it.
2007-05-14 15:49:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he may have been joking, and you took the joke a little to seriously.
Your boyfriend should care about you enough that he won't force you to have sex with him, especially if you are considering moving in together.
2007-05-14 15:48:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yeah it's wrong. It would be fine if maybe he snuggled up really close and kinda accidently woke you, but if you told him to cut it out then he's got two hands, let him take care of the problem himself. It's not like you're one of those sex dolls.
2007-05-14 15:49:38 · answer #8 · answered by wolfatrest2000 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is technically rape if he actually carries his threat through so you should talk to him and say what you feel. Sex should be a loving thing not just a necessity for a guy. Good Luck. xx
2007-05-14 15:51:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
VERY. No means no. If you don't want it, then you don't want it. It's that simple.
If he truly cares for you and loves you, then he would NEVER try to force anything like that upon you. Even in your sleep.
It's WRONG for ANYONE to do such a thing to another person.
2007-05-14 15:49:40 · answer #10 · answered by w00t 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋