my cousin wedding is soon and we can't afford to go because need to get babysitter and give money.
so do we send money even if we are not going..
2007-05-14 07:34:20 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I think it would be okay to send something it doesn't have to be money.
2007-05-14 07:45:12 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi I feel so sorry for you given this dilemma but you really should talk to your sister about it before it's too late. I can understand your sister wanting the 'perfect wedding' and wanting you to be her bridesmaid but if she knows your financial circumstances she should understand that it's going to be incredibly difficult for you and can't help thinking she's being a bit selfish here. Try to make her see past this 'rose tinted, perfect wedding' thing and stress just how hard up you are. Tell her you'd like nothing more than to be her bridesmaid but simply can't afford it. I bet there are a lot of people who can't afford to spend that kind of money to attend a wedding. If all else fails perhaps you could look into a compromise and attend the wedding, do your bit and fly home the same day - by getting a cheap flight? I hope you reach a happy conclusion in this and the best of luck to you.
2016-05-18 00:04:07 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I read your question.. and all the answers.. and then I read it again.. and it made me feel so sad that some people were telling you to send money even if you couldn't go :(
It would break my heart if I thought that someone I loved missed my wedding because they couldn't afford both a gift and a babysitter! I'd pay for the babysitter myself if I had to!
Get a nice card (the dollar store has good ones.. you don't need to spend $8 at Hallmark!)... go to the wedding... and in a few years when she's got kids and needs to get away, take them for the weekend :)
2007-05-14 20:25:45 · answer #3 · answered by endorable 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure that you can find a friend or other family member that can watch your child for free or perhaps a trade off.
Go with your spouse and enjoy the party. As for money, perhaps frame a picture of the couple in their early dating days or when they were babies. Frame's are reasonable. If they only invited you to get a gift or it's customary to give money, don't leave yourself short. Go and enjoy the evening!
If your cousin is close to you, otherwise just send a nice card!
2007-05-14 07:44:54 · answer #4 · answered by Lesley M 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok, first off, everyone is telling you that you're obligated to give a gift. You are not obligated. A gift is 100% voluntary from the giver. If you cannot afford it, you can't afford it. Period. Write a nice note to your cousin, and don't worry about it. If other family members are giving you a hard time about it, just ignore them, it's not like this is a sibling, it's a cousin.
2007-05-14 08:29:02 · answer #5 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No matter what anyone says on here. You do not have to give a gift or money if your not going to the wedding, especially if you can't afford it. Keep your money where you need it, I'm very sure the bride & groom will understand for they are getting plenty of money & many gifts from their guest.
2007-05-14 08:17:17 · answer #6 · answered by sugarBear 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I really don't think it's mandatory to give money or a gift. They probally invited you because you are family and they want you to witness their big day. So I would pay for the babysitter and not give anything, or just give them a card that you can get for 1.00 at walmart or something. If they did invite you just for money, then thats rude of them and you should go anyway and eat double the cake..lol
2007-05-14 07:58:34 · answer #7 · answered by jenn_sr03 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you don't attend you are under no obligation to give a gift. That is insane. No normal person would expect someone to put themselves in debt for a wedding gift.
RSVP and tell your cousin that you would like to apologize in advance, however; due to uncontrollable circumstances you will not be able to attend. If it is ever brought up again tell your cousin you were having financial difficulties at the time.
2007-05-14 07:49:10 · answer #8 · answered by Texas Happy Horn 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sending money is a gift, and it is up to you whether you want to send money, a card, a gift, or whatever to congratulate them. You don't need to send something that's out of your budget -- the gesture of your good wishes for them is what is most important.
2007-05-14 08:08:39 · answer #9 · answered by Parrot Eyes 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't need to send a gift, especially if you have financial issues. Give a card instead and plan on getting a nice one year anniversary gift for them :)
2007-05-14 08:28:33 · answer #10 · answered by Terri 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why do you need to give money?Can you not find a lovely inexpensive gift to give?It's not the value of the gift but the thought that counts.
Do you not have a friend or family member who could babysit for you?You could repay them by doing the same for them one day.
Even if you don't go to the wedding,you should send something.
2007-05-14 07:45:19 · answer #11 · answered by sonnyboy 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋