I'm 16 weeks pregnant and i love my fella to bits. The only problem is that now and again (more often lately) he gets really upset and emotional. He has a little boy aged 7 who he doesn't see due to him moving abroad with the mother..circumstances out of his control. He gets upset and says he feels he's failed his son and is scared he's going to be a failure of a father to our baby. He's the kindest most caring and gentle man i know..and i know he'll be a wonderful father! But nothing seems to convince him, and he feels so guilty that he is not seeing his son, more so than ever at the moment. Nothing seems to comfort him. What can i do or say?
2007-05-14 07:17:34 · 6 answers · asked by jellybean55 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
He's probably feeling down on himself in part because of the situation concerning his son and partly because he's convinced himself that due to the situation with him, that he's incapable of being a good father to the baby that the two of you have created. We all need reassurance at times that we're important to someone else. Try to reassure him that you love him and that the situation with his son is out of his control. Remind him that you and he are in this together and this is his chance to prove to himself that he's worthy of being Dad.
2007-05-14 07:22:01 · answer #1 · answered by HuntersMom 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There's isn't much you can do except be there for him. I am 24 weeks pregnant and my fiancee feels the same way. His ex wife took his daughter out of state because he wouldn't go back to her. He misses his daughter so much that he even cries for her. It's been hard cause he doesn't speak to her and the mother won't tell us where she's hiding. His daughter is 2 years old. Anytime you see him sad hold him, tell him it's not his fault and that he will see his son again. If he has to cry let him. It's very hard for someone to deal with. On a side note, you may want to consult an attorney about the mother taking him overseas. he should still have the right to see his kid. here's a link to a lawyer we are using that specialize in father's rights and they work with you on payments.
http://www.affordablehelp.org/?gclid=CPvyl635s4kCFQx1VAodRljvPQ
Whatever the case I wish you both the best and I hope that he sees his child again. It's a shame that there are so many good dads out there and the mothers would rather hurt them and the kids instead on letting their dad be there.
2007-05-14 14:26:03 · answer #2 · answered by LiLy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The very fact that he is across the ocean from his child and worries so about it is a very good indication that he will be a wonderful daddy. Don't worry, when the baby comes, he will be wonder struck and his focus will be on the new little bundle of joy.
2007-05-14 14:21:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Get help for yourself, first of all, and convince him to get some.
There is no need to bring a child into this world under circumstances like that- believe me, I did in my own way, and he suffers, our boy.
So, see what other options are available, and be prepared.
If he gets help, he may just make it, but geez, this is whole other LIFE hanging in the balance.
Don't let this be another self-fulfilling prohpecy.
2007-05-14 14:27:57 · answer #4 · answered by starryeyed 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What kind of communication does he have with his son. If they're not somewhere remote, can he do anything like a webcam to keep up conversation with him.
2007-05-14 14:20:55 · answer #5 · answered by lillilou 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
reassurance.
2007-05-14 14:40:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋