Around a year ago i started seeing a guy who moved next door with his mum. im 19 and he is 25. it was a secret thing as we didn't want others to know and still to this day nobody knows. but the worst possible things has happened. he has fallen in love with my mum and now they go out together and i sleep in a room next to them two.
what should i do??
im in a happy relationship now with a great guy, but still the though of them two getting up to stuff drives me insane and i cant bear it!!! any idea how i can get to grip with it??
any advice will help so long as its reasonable and within reason!!
2007-05-13 23:54:08 · 18 answers · asked by Kirsty N 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
omg tell your mum... when she knows she will drop the guy. You don't want a guy like that to be with your mum, and your mum certainly won't want him when she knows the truth too.
2007-05-13 23:57:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
yikes, this is a weird one but think of it another way. If your mum was seeing someone else and they came to stay would you be OK with it, or is it that your mum and a bloke are sleeping together in the next room? So you have to disassociate whether it's that your mum is having sex, or whether that she's having sex with your ex. Or is it that your ex has moved on and is seeing another woman? There's a lot of viewpoints here.
Perhaps you should tell her frankly that you find it a little uncomfortable but that you wish her well. She's probably a bit concerned about your reaction and may be avoiding the question. You can't ask her to stop seeing this guy but you could say that it's an uncomfortable situation for you. Her response, however, might be that it's her life and she doesn't dictate to you whom you see. Fair point.
It comes down to one point - you've moved on from this guy and are seeing someone else. He's moved on from you and is seeing someone else. That's normal. But he's in your space and sharing intimacies with your mum - are you worried that they're discussing you, comparing notes? I doubt your mum would do this, she probably doesn't want to raise a comparison with you.
have a think about these points. You know that you have to relax and let them get on with it and it's unreasonable to judge them or try and break them up. You have to concentrate on your future and wish them both well for the future. Love often bring together the unlikeliest of couples.
Good luck.
2007-05-14 00:51:06 · answer #2 · answered by gorgeousfluffpot 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are at fault for keeping the affair so secret, you cannot blame your mom for succumbing to the affections of a younger guy, can you? She was unaware you had been seeing him on the quiet! imagine her embarrassment if she found out! And I haven't got a high regard for his behaviour towards you, also! I don't wish to be mean, but I do think it smacks of a bit of jealousy, or maybe just your ego is hurt on your part! Try and not let it hurt you too much, after all! you did say your in a happy relationship now. Remember! it's giving your mom's ego a boost even if it isn't boosting yours! but your young, and let's hope the new man in your life is the right one for you! But I would watch out for your mom if I was you, because what he's done to you, he could do to your mum! Have a good day.
2007-05-14 00:19:23 · answer #3 · answered by wheeliebin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Blimey!
That's harsh!
Well, obviously your mum doesn't know about your relationship so you have really got to talk to your neighbour, I think he is being seriously disrespectful. Just sit down and have a calm chat with him, explain to him how it makes you feel.
Also, it might be a good idea to confess to your mum about the ex-relationship with this guy. I am sure she would be mortified to know and will make sure the relationship is a bit more subtle when you are around.
Good luck!
2007-05-13 23:58:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, that is weird-first off because you two decided to keep it quiet! Alarm bells should really be ringing there.
Isn't he quite young for your mother? Either way, you could talk to your mother and let her know the situation you had wtih him and that you are really uncomfortable wtih him staying over or you might choose to stay out while he's there. It's not an easy situation. At the very least I'd talk to your mother.
2007-05-13 23:58:41 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like shes feeling insecure contained in the relationship, and could be more beneficial intense about you than you're her. in case you opt to maintain the relationship going, you want to reassure her that you nevertheless opt to be consisting of her, and communicate over consisting of her and textual content her more beneficial. Its basically element of a real relationship. If it truly is basically too a lot for you, then split consisting of her and dont go away her astounding.
2016-10-18 07:48:03 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh my God, how awful for you. it's like something out of a dodgy book!
What about telling your Mum? up to you obviously as it's a massive decision and you'd possibly be ending their relationship then, but then, does your Mum deserve someone so sly and slimey? She'd be better off knowing really cos imagine if he told her one day - that could ruin things between you and your mum.
good luck, i feel for ya! x
2007-05-14 00:38:25 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a set of ear plugs. On a more serious note, move out if you can't deal with it!!! If she doesn't know about it tell your mum as she will be just as wierded out as you are.
2007-05-13 23:58:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you jealous or repelled by the thought of them having sex?
This guy sounds like he wasn't much of a prize to begin with.
You got rid of him.
Your mom will get rid of him once the novelty wears off.
Be patient.
2007-05-13 23:57:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
So u wanna share this guy with ur mum? Forget about him. He's not worth it! If he prefer ur mum to you, then he is out of his mind! Find other guy!
2007-05-13 23:58:44 · answer #10 · answered by ni2penang 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋