Ok gang I am leaving the US in a couple of weeks and will probably be headed back to Iraq for 6/7 months with the UK Army.I have been with my girl for nearly 3 months and have never had things so good in a relationship.We were talking last night and she said "I really like you but am holding back because of my past, I know it's cheesy but it's not you it's me". Is she playing for time so she can finish things when I get back to the UK or is she scared she will get hurt again and just needing a bit more time to come to terms with her feelings ? Any ideas on what my next move should be will be appreciated.
2007-05-13 19:31:48 · 11 answers · asked by Shy Brit guy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
From a girl's point of view, I think she has a problem of her own and felt it's not fair to drag you along in an unhealthy relationship with her. She could try to show you an unselfish act by telling you, if both of you could not be together, that it's not your fault.
If you really like her and willing to do anything to keep her, then you should let her know that you are willing to accept her for what she is, and she should resolve her problems and put them behind your future relationship.
Maybe she's not sure she can resolve it by herself, and implicating need to have "someone" on her side to getting through her problems.
In conclusion, if you really care for her then talked to her and promised her a bright future if she would just trust you and put all her problems behind/resolve it together, and asked for her commitments with you. If you think you don't want to keep her then let her passed you by, it will not cost you anything.
Good luck.......
2007-05-13 19:47:38 · answer #1 · answered by shielie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not her it's you. You're putting too much too soon into a relationship and you know that you're leaving for the war zone in a few months. Why would you do that to someone anyway. It might be best if you just maintained a close friendship with no obligations and no pressures and see what happens. If it's meant to become a loving union then let it happen naturally over time. Pushing could push someone away.
2007-05-14 02:42:38 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
She means it's your fault but doesn't want you to feel bad. She probably doesn't want to deal with the long distance relationship while you're in Iraq. OR, she could be wanting to play the field while you're away (more likely). All you can really do is just let her go, or NOT go to Iraq and try to work things out. But, I think you're better off without her.
2007-05-14 02:34:28 · answer #3 · answered by Steve M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is not ready for a commitment. Better she do this now than write you a Dear John letter while you are in Iraq. Give her time. Just don't expect her to wait for you. She is just unsure of the situation now.
2007-05-14 02:40:10 · answer #4 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The day you leave, she has a dinner date with someone else. She is not willing to wait for you or has decided not to. It's her way of telling you she's gone.
2007-05-14 02:44:11 · answer #5 · answered by Gunny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just forget about her. She probably doesn't want a relationship with someone in the military.
2007-05-14 02:39:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Bottom line--she is afraid you are going to get killed. That is a fear that you can't do anything about and I think it is the cause for her to say and do the things she is doing.
2007-05-14 02:47:00 · answer #7 · answered by Monsieur Rick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry to say this, she does not want you.She is looking for a nice way to tel you that. Kick her to the curve.Live goes on.
2007-05-14 02:37:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
man she scared you may not come back so she tellin you in code lets break up
2007-05-14 02:41:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is not into you, like you are about her...whatever about the past, excuses...don't call her, she will call you if it fancies her...
2007-05-14 02:40:41 · answer #10 · answered by hpage 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋