Why is there a double standard for men and women when it comes to violent behavior?

Question

Some responses to the question here:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ajl6DcbcW1Lvfab0iLg9GzHsy6IX?qid=20070513185553AALYYar&show=7#profile-info-PxJXU5nuaa

have me a little perplexed. My feelings on the topic are in the thread, but some of the responses lead me to ask women...IF you agree she was right to slap him, can't he hit her back?

If not, EXACTLY why not? What gives you a right that he doesn't have? What gives you a pass to be violent?

If you've hit him, haven't you sent the message that if you're ticked enough it's an appropriate response? Why SHOULDN'T you expect the same treatment?

Doc:

I'm with you in most of what you've said, but:

Quoote:
For example, if a guy does something really stupid, like playing grabass with a stranger, he knows he has earned a slap and should not object strenuously if the young lady gives him one.

That's different. By touching her when uninvited you've actually legally assaulted her and she does have a right to defend herself.

Answer 1

It is wrong to hit anyone unless it is for self-defense. The poster of that question was in the wrong and if her BF was a wise man he would have called the cops for assault.

My mother told me long ago that you don't hit unless your willing to be hit.

Answer 2

No. Physical violence is never the answer. It just makes you look like a kid throwing a tantrum.

As far as the double standard goes, I personally believe that you should get whatever you give, especially when you have had some training. You can certainly do some damage. Unfortunately, the law doesn't see it that way, since men (on average) are stronger than women physically. Also, men tend to be more violent anyway, courtesy of higher levels of testosterone in the bloodstream. Because of this, the law tends to give women an easier time when it comes to physical confrontations with men - even when she is obviously stronger. The bad news is that women have been brought up with the understanding that it's OK for them, since he's not legally allowed to reciprocate - which makes them more likely to become physically violent in the first place. How many women would slap a guy if they knew that he could do the same right back, without legal of social repercussions?

Of course, if violence can be avoided, it should be. It never solves anything - it merely escalates the issue. Now, what was an argument has become a full-blown fight.

Answer 3

Yeah, there is a double standard. Maybe even a triple standard.

For example, if a guy does something really stupid, like playing grabass with a stranger, he knows he has earned a slap and should not object strenuously if the young lady gives him one.

If the violence is uncalled for, that is a different situation. When girlfriends used to get cocky and talk trash, I've been known to tell them, "As long as you act like a lady, I'll treat you like a lady. If you start trying to act like a man, I'll treat you like a man, and strike back."

These days, I just turn away and leave. Even an act of self-defense could result in a charge of domestic violence, and such a charge will cause you to have your right to bear arms to be taken from you.

Yep, double standards. They are not right, but they do exist.

Doc

Answer 4

I completely agree and my husband has posed the exact same question. More than once I have hit him ot of anger and he has complacently sat by holding his fury in. There is no reason as to why women can hit men except for the fact that rarely do women actually injure men. I think it's more of a stigma associated w/ domestic abuse. Women, for some reason, always get off easier. It's like the penal system doesn't view women as real threat. Women usually serve lesser prison sentences than men regardless of the crime...it's not fair but for some reason we have the advantage.

Answer 5

I think it's based on gender and society.

Typically, these days the double standard for men are mainly due to the view of society and what's "cool". Generally guys praise other guys for being able to have sex with a girl or girls.

As for women, they're just more emotional than men are. Why? I don't know, but it really seems that way. Some men are even worse when it comes to being violent than women, so we shouldn't be hypocrites.

Answer 6

Neither gender is justified in violent behavior toward anyone.
Females tend to be more emotionally inclined than males. It was generally, expected for males to behave more rationally than females in an emotionally charged situation, because males had the advantage of greater upper body strength than females. That is where the expression "You hit like a girl!" came from. A fist fight between a male and a female is physiologically weighted in favor of the male.

Answer 7

yes it is a double standard a woman can beat t he crap out of a guy call the police and say he abused her then he gets hauled off to jail. I've seen it happen

Answer 8

i didnt look at your link but ive often wondered the same thing.