I have only known for 5 weeks, he has only known for 2 wks, he never married, no kids.......and flipping out....wants to terminate pregnancy....I do not....It is a dilemma, we cannot resolve.....should i expect this man to step up to the plate....I have no gaping needs, I have a house, business, cars, money etc...ful life...Am I being selfish by not giving him what he wants?
2007-05-13 07:42:04 · 20 answers · asked by cherry 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I've learned in life that although you have to be respectful of others If you don't follow your heart you will always regret it!
2007-05-16 13:19:46 · answer #1 · answered by collegegrllstress 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that since this is a very high-risk pregancy at your age you should terminate. You face a slew of potential birth defects. Think of the child who would be 12 when you are 60. Can you really be an active single mom of a toddler at 50? Do you want to use your 'grandma' years being a mom all over again?
Don't expect too much from him. If you already have a "full life" then just have him terminate his parental rights after the child is born and let him go on with his life.
good luck
2007-05-13 07:55:37 · answer #2 · answered by PrincessJesci 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Do one thing. Read the biggest city newspaper you can get your hands on the day before the date and then let it go. You'll have the latest news under your belt and so be able to bring up something kind of interesting if the conversation lags some. But don't worry. i'm a serial dater and rarely have to think of things to say. You will find you know far more than you think, that he will likely be nervous too and that if you hit it off he may just find the noises the boys make at dinner the cutest things he's heard all day. gentle thoughts
2016-05-17 08:00:32 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why give him what HE wants? It's your choice too! If he wants nothing to do with the baby, then it's his loss. He needs to be prepared to pay child support though! I'm not gonna say anything about getting pregnant by a man that you've only known for 5 weeks because I'm sure you feel awful enough about that. That man needs to quit being a baby and grow up and take care of his responsibilities.
2007-05-13 07:47:06 · answer #4 · answered by ..... 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are the one that will have to carry this baby. Birth this baby, and have the responsibility of raising it for 20 years or so. All he HAS to do is pay 1/2 the hospital bills and child support. In relationship to what you have to do,that is rather a small contribution. That is what weight I feel you should give his opinion. A small amount. He had the option of using protection and spermicide if he wanted to prevent unwanted pregnancies.
2007-05-13 07:50:35 · answer #5 · answered by thirsty mind 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not being selfish, but if you expect him to step up and take responsibility, you're living in a fantasy world. Men like him have no sense of responsibility and are only out for what they can get. If you decide to have and keep the child you need to be able to do it all on your own, because he is a chicken s--t. Good luck to you.
2007-05-13 07:46:42 · answer #6 · answered by seniorchiefretired 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your choice, you are the one pregnant.
Even though he has a word into the situation, you should consider but not necessarily live by it... He wants it terminated because he probably doesn't want to be with you forever, and he doesn't want to have to pay child support, or have anything to do with you long term, and a child is just baggage to him. Unfortunately if that is the case, he should have done something more to prevent the issue from happening, such as not have sex with you... But since he did and you got pregnant, its his problem now, and you are the one who can decide what to do about it.
Play with fire, sometimes you get burned. Thats my advice to him.
2007-05-13 07:48:18 · answer #7 · answered by brandonb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you are not why should you give him anything if he wants to terminate your child do you want to live with that i dont think so by the way he is acting he probaby will not be around long. besides that whose body is it , and he has never been married so he is not experienced, if you have everything you need and want to keep your baby then do that , that is not being selfish that is making yourself happy . men come and go , ask your kids their opinion are they happy with this , i would do as i felt in your circumstances.
2007-05-13 07:50:46 · answer #8 · answered by freeflow 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you are being selfish. You are too old to be making babies, you are too old to have a good chance at normal pregnancy, you are too old and it will increase the risk of problems with the baby, you are too old to have start the mommy track again. You want to write a check that your child will be cashing, that is selfish.
The only thing you should expect this guy to do is pay child support. He will not be a good father and will be a horrible husband. Yes you are being selfish about him too.
2007-05-13 07:51:42 · answer #9 · answered by Just a friend. 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
He doesn't want to be a part of the childs life?
Then if YOU insist on having the child, make him sign off on paternity. He will never have to pay support, but he also loses any rights to be part of his/her life. This is about the only way to resolve the dilemma.
I can understand his feelings, and wonder why you were both so careless.
2007-05-13 07:47:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not being selfish. If you want to have the baby, have the baby, because if you don't, you will regret it and always wonder about your child that could have been. Let him decide if he wants to be in the childs life or not, but it is your decision whether you want to keep your baby or not.
2007-05-13 07:47:54 · answer #11 · answered by c 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋