We've been married a year and a half and have a two month old son. He's done other things I objected to (got a MySpace account in secret), flirted with his ex online. He also got an email from a girl he was talking to on clubpogo- and he told her she was hot. She called him sexy.
2007-05-12 20:08:11 · 24 answers · asked by cinderella4653 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I can tell you from my own experience, this is infidelity. He is cheating on you! Are you going to put up with it? There is a wealth of information on the internet about online cheating. Just go to 'Online infidelity' and read all about it. I have first hand experience, you have every right to be livid about this. Even if he never touches one of them physically, it is emotional adultery and should not be tolerated. It will ruin your relationship and marriage. He has no business flirting with other women, he is a married man! Sound him about it, let him know you won't put up with it. Don't be his doormat, demand the respect you deserve as his wife. He must stop or you will seperate from him and his unfaithfulness. You have every right as his wife to know what he is saying and doing with other women, online or in the flesh! Don't let him tell you you should mind your own business or stay out of his business! It is your business as his WIFE!!!
2007-05-12 20:38:17 · answer #1 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say this, unless he has done more than send an electronic message to someone than things can be fixed. If he is wetting his willy, that is down right disrespectful to you and you are right to be angry. However, it seems like you have some trust issues and sounds like you both might benefit from marriage counseling. Perhaps you need to communicate better with each other, as it appears you are "looking" for evidence, and maybe he just doesn't see the distinction between flirting, and cheating. Why he has a profile is cause for a discussion, the email to his ex is a no no. Good luck finding a positive solution, wish you the best.
2014-06-28 16:56:14 · answer #2 · answered by unpopular 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweetie, I'm sorry you're hurting. But that's no way to have a relationship. You can't check up on him like that. If he's doing that , it's time to move on. But if you try to work it through, you have to trust him and at least respect his privacy. Personally, I'd move on; infidelity is a deal breaker. But, that's none of that is my call obviously..if you want to proceed , you can try googling his user name and yahoo answers..he will probably come up. If you can't get anywhere or see his q's..you can create a dummy profile, and try to communicate with him and and get an add. Truly, I wouldn't recommend that. It degrades your relationship (yes, I know infidelity does as well). Good luck!
2016-05-17 05:26:21 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you should do, is decide. Apparently, faithfulness wasn't what your husband meant when he asked you to marry him. Assuming you expected to be the only woman in your husband's bed and life, you now need to decide if you are such a useless and valueless person that you deserve being treated so disrespectfully. People here will suggest counseling, but I see no point. It doesn't seem as though your husband was ever faithful, and it isn't likely he'll start now. Live with a cheating mate, or get divorced. I favor the divorce, because your child will be better off with no Dad, than a dad who shows that women aren't really worth much. And, YES, that is the message your child would pick up from his father, if that is how his father feels.
2007-05-13 03:16:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you think you could just not bring it up to him?
What does he Do? Is he working, coming home, interacting with Baby....does he treat you with common courtesy and affection?
Guys have this access, dear. Dump him and you'll be looking for some neanderthal who can't log on.
Instead of reading his e-mail, why don't you send him one? Call him sexy. You have the inside track here, dear.
You text him, "Can't wait til you get home." you e-mail him, " My heart melts when you spoil the baby."
I have a policy. I dress nice and wear a little makeup during the day. After my shower, I really do my makeup and put on oh, something a little more comfortable, and I become those cyber-women's worst nightmare.
He chatted with his friends and I never said a word. Most nights now, ummm, that doesn't happen. .....
buy some candles, chill the wine, and be his cyber-fantasy in the flesh......
2007-05-13 03:17:26 · answer #5 · answered by Puresnow 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my goodness, Im so sorry you are having to go through that! I know it's hard for a man to deal with the lack of sex during a child's birth, but he did make a vow to you. Do you have somewhere you can stay if you confront him? On the other hand, Im thinking- Make him jealous, or scared that you are thinking of leaving him, or find out if he has a need to have casual sex, and let him know that you might enjoy that yourself! If it's his ego causing this, maybe you should try to make him feel sexy? Good luck. I know it must be so hurtful, but men do it all the time, and it may be somewhat innocent (online only).
2007-05-12 20:21:40 · answer #6 · answered by Logic Lost And Found 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a bad deal to me, the worst is actually the pogo account the rest of can all be explained away, but you cannot explain away calling another girl hot. You have to do what you feel is right, but a man that is sending e-mails to another woaman clearly is a cheater, or considers the online world to be his own place to do what he wants without consequences, either way not a good situation.
2007-05-12 20:17:07 · answer #7 · answered by scorch_22 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you considered marriage counseling? It's not like it's a bad thing to try it. Maybe your husband feels like he needs more from you for some reason. He needs to know how you feel and know that flirting with and ex is a terrible thing to do let alone flirting with anyone else. Oh and remember to keep your son's best interest in mind.
2007-05-12 20:15:26 · answer #8 · answered by christina s 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just the fact that he doesn't have enough respect for the things you object to is enough to question his committment. But to knowingly say he's been sending love letters to another woman makes me wonder why you haven't cashed in on his blatant infidelity. (sending emails with sexual inuendos to other women online is the same as "sending love letters by snail mail" or having "a 1-900-call girl to talk dirty to him") Your husband is cheating on you, and lying to your face about it.
Child or no child he knows exactly what he is doing and as of right now you have been forgiving him of his inappropriate behavior. He is having affairs with your knowledge and while it's been going on, you haven't done anything about it. Cash in your marriage license, and get him away from your son before he catches dad with his full blown "cyber sex material".
2007-05-12 21:11:52 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How very hurt you must feel. I would be so upset if I was you, what an idiot he is. I think your trust is destroyed by now, tell him to go and then he can talk to who ever he wants online or elsewhere, and that , that will free you up to find someone else too, but that while together you cant even think of doing that. You Deserve better, he is a loser.
2007-05-12 20:18:42 · answer #10 · answered by spuds_suds 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋