My husband wants us to..........?

Question

My husband wants me to leave our little one bedroom apartment and move in with his mother and 2 little brothers in a two bedroom trailer.
He says that paying rent is stupid when we could live there. And he says he is more relaxed when he is at his moms..cause he doesn't hear the train and neighbors. He is acting really unhappy with everything in our lives since he suggested this. Also he tried to leave me 2 weeks ago and of course his mom was there in our apartment helping him pack.....while I was there. We got into an arguement and he started calling me a whore, etc...he was screaming this in my face so I slapped him....Anyway we have gotten past all this and he moved back in and now he is starting it up again....what should I do? I'm NOT moving in with his mama.....But how should I handle this. I'm crying right now while I'm typing because I love this man with all my heart....he is my husband.....God what should I do? thanks

When he left 2 weeks ago it was because we got in an arguement about one of our cars we were trying to sell.

When he left 2 weeks ago it was because we got in an arguement about one of our cars we were trying to sell.

We have lived together for a year. and we have been married for 3 months. We actually lived with his mom the first 7 months....I was so unhappy. When he was at work I didn't come out of our room.

Answer 1

Genesis 2:23-25 (New King James Version)

23 And Adam said:
“This is now bone of my bones
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.”

24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
---------------
Matthew 19:4-6 (King James Version)

4And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female,
5And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?
6Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

The lord teaches us that once a man and woman decide to form a family the man should join his wife and make a life both together because one belongs to the other one now and a man should be a man and provide for his family now.

I had somewhat the same problem I was living with my mom when I married my wife we spend about a year in my mom's house and eventhough I felt good at my mothers house my mom did not like my wife so we started to have problems eventually I found the solution and it was moving as far as I could away from my father and mother I ended up moving form NC to TX and eventhough we live by ourselfs we live happy I'm not telling you to move to another state, that was my solution what you and your husband need to do is move further away your husband needs to put on his pants and stop trying to be a freeloader because once he is in his moms house his mom will start putting stuff in his head and you'll get the worts of it belive me I been there and he will probably stop working since mom and dad are supporting him now.
so let him know that God wants you and him to live happy not live mother father son and dauther-in-law. because that is not going to work belive me I've live it I've seen other people with the same problem so before you talk to him pray to the lord with you hart to give him understanding and change his mine for the better. and the lord will help you. because it sounds to me you all need the lord in your life. so moving in with mom will not work and if he chooses mom over you than he does not deserve you because he is inmature. But I belive the lord will help you show him in the bible what God says about this and the lord will change his mine. I'll pray for you
and if he loves you he will go with you
God Bless you.

Answer 2

Your husband needs to grow up and leave mama and cleave to you!
Paying rent is stupid? I think not. Stick to your guns and DON'T move in with his mother. Oh my goodness NO. If you are unhappy where you are living, then by all means, move. Everybody has to pay rent or a mortgage payment. That's just part of being an adult, unless you are a millionaire and can buy a home free and clear. But, then, to your dear sweet husband, you'd still have to pay taxes!

Ok, now there are two sides to every story. Perhaps, if your husband has the intention of his family living with mother for a year, or two, and actually saves the 'rent' money to put down as a down payment for a home of your own- this is a whole different ballgame. You could probably live with her for a short time of your life, so that later years will be more comfortable.

If you truly love this man and he loves you, then work it out. Whatever it takes. Even if that means 'moving in with his mama."

Answer 3

how old are you guys? how long have you been married? can the 2 of you afford to buy a house? sorry for all the Q but I ask because if you are young and haven't been married all that long it sounds to me like maybe he wasn't ready for all the responsibilities of marriage and being on his own.... if you can afford to buy a house I would ask him if u 2 could start looking for your own home that way you could move away from the train, you wouldn't have neighbors on top of you and you would be paying for your own home rather than an apartment that will never be your own....how do you get along with his mom? sounds to me like she having a problem with him being married too she isn't ready for him to leave the nest yet...you need to talk to him tell hm how much you love and want to be with him, tell him that your not comfortable with moving in with his family..unless its so the 2 of you can save some money so you can get your own house and the 2 of you can come up with a time frame of how long you will stay there for. I'm sorry you are going through this its hard but I also think you should ask him if he is happy being married. I hope this has helped and wasn't to confusing for you...also as far as the name calling...unacceptable!!!!! I don't care how mad he gets he should never never call you names.....you should tell him that....good luck to you both....

Answer 4

Sounds to me like he isn't mature enough for a serious relationship.

He wants to live with mama, and he tries to leave you over selling a car, sorry to say sister but he has alot of growing up to do.

I'm sure that you don't want to call it quits, so maybe you could give it a trial separation period. Let him move back to his mommy, and you can work on your life. If the two of you can't find a way, then maybe it is time to go your separate ways.

I hope you are able to find a way to work through it all. Good luck.

Answer 5

Since HE is your husband, you need to sit down
and have a talk with him about the situation and
let him know why it would be better not to move
in with his mom, and try and come up with a better
idea that you and him will conform to. If he does
not like where he lives because of the noise and
paying rent, at his mom's place he will have to help
out monetarily and since he has to dish out money
no matter how little or how much, it's best that the
money be dished out for you two because living
with in-laws almost always does not work out for
the married couple. Reason with him and come to
terms and if he just flatly refuses then you need to
think what you want for the future with him as if he
does not want to work with you now, maybe he is
not as much in love with you as you are with him
so you need to start thinking what is best for you.
Good luck.

Answer 6

Tell him no. It's a bad idea. You are married he needs to grow up and be a man. might as well start now. Stand your ground. Don't let yourself be bullied in to something you don't agree with. You'll be in someone else's home. Their rules. You won't have personal space. And because she is his mother she will feel she has more rights then you. I say no way. Stay at the little apartment you will be happier. If you do what he says. You'll end up divored before you know it.

Answer 7

please realize we all can say things we regret during a argument. more often than not money problems are the cause for many of our quarrels. having said that i want to impress upon you the need for professional help in dealing
with your marriage at this point. it's best if both of you seek help together, but go alone if he refuses. every church has a
program and there are also secular options. this may seem
something of a cop out and not the answer you were looking
for, but a marriage is not a simple thing that can be put back on track exchanging a few paragraphs. may God bless you.

Answer 8

it seems like he's still a momma's boy. He doesnt want to pay rent, and thinks its okay for him to just move in with his mom. And I bet his mom is okay with that.
He's not grown up yet. He still has insecurities that needs to be fixed. As previous people wrote, he's not ready to get married. I wish you would have known this before you two tied the knot.
He may also be trying to find stability, and get away from you. He knows that moving in with his mom drives you nuts. You want to be independent. You want to share your life with your husband. Not with his mom.
You cant control your husband.. men are hard to budge from decisions that they have already made. Just hope the best, and hope you make the right decision for yourself.

Answer 9

I would suggest you pray about it. But be prepared, God may not answer your prayer the way that you want him to. I am sorry to say this but . . . . It sounds to me like he has already made his decision. FYI, he didn't just become unhappy with everything. He is just now expressing that to you. I agree with bronze -- he is probably not ready for marriage. That said, don't think there is something wrong with you. It could have been any woman. It just happened to be you.

Answer 10

Let him go home to his mothers, he is not cut out for the married life. And how cheap can a man be to wanna live in a crowded trailer?