Cat scared/shy, what can I do?

Question

My daughter and I adopted a 2 year old male cat one week ago. The cat was rescued with a broken leg 1 year ago and lived at Save a Pet for one year. The first night home, he laid on my bed or in the window and let us hold him and pet him. Since the very next day, he is always hiding. When I do get him out, he lets me pet, brush, and hold him. He purrs and purrs and loves it. Then, all of a sudden, he will just take off. He has never come to me willingly, I have to physically grab and pick him up (from hiding under the bed, behind the tv,etc).
The volunteers at the shelter said he is a lap cat, but I don't see that side of him.
I was told the other day not to force him out and now the only time I have seen him in the last 3 days is when he eats or runs to use his litter.
Is there anything I can do to help him adjust? I don't want him to be so scared and secluded. He was not like that at the shelter. Am I doing something wrong?

Answer 1

Cats are very much creatures of habit and it will take him some time to settle in to your home and get used to everyone, especially if he is naturally shy.

Don't forget that he has spent half of his life living at the shelter. Whilst it might not be considered the ideal home for a cat, he became accustomed to his surroundings and familiar with the people that worked there. I'm sure that if any of the staff knew him from when he first arrived at the shelter, they would remember that he was probably not a lap cat when they first took him in. If he was that confident, then he would be like that with you too.

He needs to be given lots of time to settle into his new home. Be patient with him and don't force the issue by grabbing him. He won't understand that you want to be nice to him, he'll just feel threatened. Let him hide away if he wants to, but if you're in the same room as him, talk nicely to him in a gentle voice. When he looks at you, blink your eyes slowly a couple of times, then look away. (In cat body language this shows you're not a threat and is the reason why cats always go to the guest who's trying to avoid making eye contact with them). Feed him several small meals a day so that he will be tempted to venture out of hiding to eat. When he comes close or allows you to pet him, offer him treats as he'll quickly learn that there are benefits to being your friend. .

You could also try a plug-in Feliway diffuser as these are supposed to have a calming effect on cats.

You don't mention your daughter's age, but sometimes young children unintentionally make cats nervous, because of their high voices and lively behaviour. If your daughter is young, encourage her to speak to the cat in a soft voice.

I've posted a link below which offers further advice.

http://www.catgroup.org/live_harmony_11211.htm

His life improved from the moment you adopted him, he just doesn't know it yet.

Good luck.

Answer 2

I have a cat that I got from the shelter also. You've only had this cat for a week. Give it a chance. My cat did the same thing. Just let him alone. Wait until he's ready to come to you. Don't force him to do anything. But make sure he knows you love him. He's just getting used to his surrroundings and maybe wants a little freedom since he was in a cage for awhile. I'm curious also. How did he get a broken leg? Was he abused? If he was, then he may just be afraid. He also may just be an aloof cat. My cat wants my attention only when she wants it. And I can only pet her for a few minutes and that's enough for her. She's not a lap cat,either. But she'll lay on the sofa a short distance from me. I just let her be. She comes to me when she feels like it. That's just the way cats are.I also had an older cat,16 years old when she passed on. She always hid from me and everyone else. Always stayed under the bed or behind the sofa all the years I had her. She only came out to eat or go to the bathroom and maybe once in awhile to sit in the window. The only time she really wanted my attention was when she was old and not feeling well. I think she knew she was not going to last so she wouldn't leave my side. But anyway, your cat just needs time,even if it takes a couple months. Just keep loving him.

Answer 3

Feeding her quality food, Natural Balance, Wellness, etc. The brands without by products and grains are the best. She is a skiddish cat and this may be stress for her if there are alot of noises, people and things that scare her. Hopefully this isn't a common occurance. With what you have said, your kitty still has a few good years left. As long as nothing is ailing her now, a check up at 10 would be a good idea, just to check on her health and maybe get suggestions from a doctor about her well being. I hope your cat is around for a long long time.

Answer 4

Shy Cats

Answer 5

First don't force him into your arms your scaring him into thinking your out to get him. The best thing to do is let the cat get used to his new home since this is all new to him, the next thing to do is to be calm emotionally and keep the noise level down. Soon you will find the cat coming out more and soon it will come out and everything but remember never force your cat into anything cause it will make the cat hide more. I rescued a cat from my hallway he stayed under my bed for the first couple of weeks after that he started coming out when he found were weren't out for him. He then started letting us touch him and feed him from the hand. He has grown to be a lap cat and very big and lovable. I would leave some treats out and show that you love your cat by talking in a soothing tone and soon everything will work out. I've done this and seen it work over 6 times with my six cats.

Answer 6

hello;
i had a cat tht stayed under the bed for three months. i went in and layed down on the floor next to her, and just talked to her. she is now the sweetest cuddlebug.
if you want this cat not to be scared, don't try to catch or touch him...he will eventually feel safe enough if he knows you won't grab him..... know how it feels when a relative comes over to hug or kiss you, and you don't really want that...you don't really want to be with that person right then? compare how you feel inside, then, with how you feel when safe enough to go over to a person, and hug them or give them a kiss on the cheek... feel the difference between these two ways of feeling?
i think this is how cats feel about who they feel safe with. i know it's not easy, cause your cat's so cute... one other thing i've done might help you both....go to a pet store and buy 'feliway'. it's a synthetic pheremone that cats have on their cheeks(that's why they cheek everything - it marks that person/thing as theirs) when you lightly spray this in a room where the cat is, it will very likely make him feel safer, though this may take a few days or even weeks. (this stuff is very expensive, and it does work...follow the directions carefully).
another, less expensive thing you can do is buy some 'rescue remedy' (made by 'bach's flower remedies) from a health food store, and put three or four drops each day into his fresh water.
good luck. let me know what happens..... yungdrung3

Answer 7

i love that you took in an adult male cat. not many people want a fully grown cat, usually they want kittens. and he had a broken leg? you must be an awesome person!
i doubt your doing anything wrong. give him time, try getting a toy, they really like those feather toys....play with him.
its hard to adjust for him, especially since you dont know his background.
just be sweet and never force him to come out, just pet him where he is or try to lure him out with food or a toy.
he just needs to relax.
i have a cat like that too....its been awhile but she is getting better. she still runs under the bed most of the time when you come into the room...but she has definately warmed up more because she feels safe.
just have patience and show him love.
he will definately come around.
you will see differences, try as much as you can to show him that you care.
i hope everything works out.

Answer 8

Shy Kitty

Answer 9

It will take time for him to learn to trust you. You can train a dog, but a cat trains you. Investing in a little catnip to sprinkle on a toy, a bit of string to play with, and taking the time to sit and watch tv or read a book, be available and appear to be ignoring him, all can help. My youngest was found in a parking lot at 6 weeks, he only comes out of hiding for me, still, but he does come out and lay on my lap, sleep on my bed, ask for attention. (or he did until the ear yeast meds).

Answer 10

No, Not at all he is just being cautious and checking out the house and his new owners. You must have lots of Patience's.
I took in a cat and he still hides from people he has seen many, many times. they are skid dish, and will be for along time. he will come around. Just show him lots of love and you will all be fine.