What should I do to help my boyfriend drive safely after our prom tomorrow night?

Question

Ok, we are going to drive to Lake Tahoe around midnight on an interstate. It's about a 3 hour drive at normal speed. We are spending two nights together and yes we will be romantic (its a long story but we both have parental permission so my question is not covering that aspect but about getting there alive and home safe on Monday afternoon. Ok we both recently got our licenses but I have not done any high speed driving as of yet and his step dad has been training him on the interstates (but its limited so far). My dad likes to drive fast and my mom is always telling him to slow down. Should I insist to Jamie that he drive at 55 mph which I believe is the normal speed and not try to rush. Plus as we enter the interstate should I help him watch for oncoming cars? Oh ya I'm not just concerned about my safety. I want him to drive no faster than 55 mph even when he is driving alone. Of course no cell phones. What about talking with him. Should we be quiet? Other suggestions?

I am reading all the good suggestions Thanks so far. A few people mentioned not drinking alcoholic beverages. First it is a high school prom and no alcohol is permitted plus we were warned this week that any one who appears under the influence will be asked to leave. Even while we are together we will not consume any alcohol. Anyway we are underage for drinking. Plus alcohol is a depressant and degrades "performance". I certainly don't want him not to up to maximum performance because of alcohol (lol lol).

Answer 1

Don't make him tense, relax a little bit. I drive 20 times worse when there is a cop behind me because it makes me nervous. Just be cautious of other drivers and wear your seat belt!

Answer 2

Most importantly... travel as close to the speed of other vehicles as you feel comfortable. I would suggest not exceeding 9mph over the posted speed limit, so around 60-64mph should be plenty fast to not get run off the road completely by other drivers. Keep your cell phones handy in case you need them, but just talk to each other like you normally would converse. Try not to play the stereo too loud as this can sometimes be a distraction as well. As a passenger, you may certainly assist in watching for other cars and road hazards, but DO NOT... DO NOT tell him to watch out in a startling manner, this can cause the unexpected to happen.

Get plenty of rest the night before, if you take turns driving, that would be ok as well, just let each other drive as they feel comfortable. Be sure to print a copy of the route you plan on taking, and DO NOT change that route, judging by the sound of your driving experience level, show the route to your parents and tell them that you'll call if the route changes. Although it will be late, maybe a call home upon arrival would be a good idea as well. Last word of advice is that the most important thing to watch out for is the other guy.

Hope this helps, have fun at the prom and enjoy your weekend.

Answer 3

Hmm, you seem to think slower = safer. That is not true. What's safest is to move at about the same speed as other traffic.

You make things a lot more complicated and unsafe by going slower than other traffic. For one thing you force other cars to stream around you. For another, you can't safely merge or change lanes when you're going much slower than the other traffic, because it means you have to constantly be looking behind you for cars coming up on you fast, while also looking ahead of you to see where you're going.

You may be thinking of "55 saves lives", an old government slogan to support this old law:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/National_Maximum_Speed_Law
Turns out it wasn't really true; the fatality rate remained flat after the law was repealed in 1995.
http://www-fars.nhtsa.dot.gov/
(compare fatalities to vehicle miles traveled.)

On average California freeways you should be going 60-70 depending on the flow of traffic. If you want to be a stickler for a particular number, I'd say 65 but that's still wrong. You need to move with the flow of traffic. Join it and flow with it like a dance partner, don't rigidly go speed X. That would be like dancing rigidly to a set pattern and expecting your partner to keep up!

The #1 thing you can do for safety is keep your undivided attention on the road and on driving. Don't use a cell phone, don't have emotionally intense conversations, don't drive exhausted, don't daydream. Teenagers have the best visual acuity and dexterity of anyone, they SHOULD be the safest drivers on the road. Think hard about why they're not, and you'll know what not to do! :)

Answer 4

Ah I remember my first highway experience. The thing you gotta do as a passenger is to make the driver feel confident. This means no arguing over which road to take. It is best if you watch sideways and do the "shoulder-check" just to be sure that it is safe to change lanes, but if he is doing a good job, don't tell him there is a car here and there because he may be looking at another direction where there may be danger and you will distract him. Simply remind him that if he misses. As for the speed, although it is important not to exceed the posted limit by 5 to 10 miles, but it is more important to move at the same speed as the general traffic as this will create less difficulty for other drivers on the road to make maneuvers. Also the most important thing is to always be aware of the traffic in your surroundings. On a highway it is proper to do a full check of all the mirrors every 5 seconds.

Answer 5

Drive whatever speed you are comfortable driving and that conditions allow within the speed limit. Help him watch for merging traffic, and watch for other drivers not paying attention. If you both have cell phones the driver should only be concentrating on driving, if one of the phones rings you should take the calls not the driver, if its important pull over so the driver can take the call.

Talking with the driver should be kept to a point as not to engage in a type of conversation that can cause arguments, but talking with the driver is a good idea as it keeps them awake.

Have fun and enjoy your trip. Lake Tahoe is beautiful.

Answer 6

It seems you and your boyfriend have some communication problems. If you had a problem with his taking this girl, you should have been honest up front and not "somewhat agreed to them going together". I say three cheers to the boy for not letting this other girl down after she purchased the dress. What do you expect to happen on a ten minute drive? And why do you feel you can dictate the terms? Do you really want it to be over with this boy? Your ultimatum might lead to that. How to handle it - try with some dignity? Meet him at the prom with a smile, and be kind to this other girl. Its not her fault that you broke up, and think, if he can do the honorable thing for her, doesn't that make him a nicer guy than one who could let her down? How would you feel if it was the reverse and your the one who got the dress on the promise of a companion for the function? Doesn't sound much like you two have really made much progress since your breakup. are you sure you should be together?

Answer 7

I'm 18 years old and have done a lot of hi way driving with and without friends and my girl friend. the best suggestion i can give you is just don't make him nervous. with guys we sometimes drive a little fast or what seems reckless but most of us know what we are doing. the normal speed on a hi way is around 70 mph. if he is close to the speed limit and going with the flow of traffic try not to bother him. it will just make him have to think of one more thing. i would say just talk to him and carry on a normal conversation to keep him awake and alert. if he starts drifting off ask him to pull over for a few minutes and rest. a 15 minute nap and walking around for a few seconds will make him much more alert. if he drinks coffee get a thermos of it to bring along. when he is coming on to the hi way and getting off or changing lanes look for cars where he will be going and in his blind spots and tell him when its clear ( i have people with me say "clear , go" when its ok to move over and keep repeating it until its no longer safe). just figure out what works for him. also some music can help but if its a distraction then turn it down or keep it off. if you have more questions or i can help you can contact me at [e-mail]. best of luck and have a good time.

Answer 8

Don't turn off the cells just incase your parents try to contact you, but put them maybe in the backseat or whatever (the person in the passenger seat can get them). No drinking before the drive, WEAR YOUR SEATBELTS, no loud music as it tends to distract us from what we need to concentrate on. Usually highways and interstates have nighttime speed limits. The white speed limit signs are the daytime and the black signs are for the night so be aware of those. Also be aware of other drivers, usually they are the ones you have to be the most aware of. Good luck!!

Answer 9

I would say to go whatever the speed limit is, it is O.K. to go as much as 5 miles an hours over the speed limit, but I would say no faster than that.
Yes, help him look for other cars and talk some so he doesn't fall asleep. Please tell him no drinks (alcoholic beverage) and you insist this must be the way or you won't go. I hope he respects your opinion.
However, don't make him so nervous either so he won't make bad decisions driving this could cause him to have an accident.

Answer 10

You sound like you may be a "nervous Nelly"about driving. Obeying the posted speed limited and shoulder checking when lane changing are a must. If you are a nervous wreck in a car try not to show it. It may cause him to lose confidence in his driving. Have a great trip and be safe.

Answer 11

55 is way too slow on an interstate, you might get rear ended. 70-75 is a good speed. He needs to accelerate while on the entering ramp and you need to help him watch his blind spot. If someone flies up on your butt, not get mind that doesn't help, just change lanes and get out of their way

Turn Off the cells