she wasn't home yet and her husband told me to wait for her. While I was waiting, he made a pass at me! I don't know what to do now. I tried to blow it off but he tried to kiss me and he wasn't even drunk or anything. He didn't even try to apologize either. We have all been friends for 2 years and socialize together often. So I left and went home. And right before I walked out the door, he said "You'd want me if I was single, right?". I said "no, we are just friends, why mess things up?". My friend just called and I told her I left because I felt sick but where do I go from here??? I still want to be friends with her but not with him. Do I tell her what happened?
2007-05-10 12:16:26 · 27 answers · asked by cat 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would, first, talk to your friend's husband about how you feel. Tell him that you love your friend, and you would never do anything to hurt her, and that includes having an affair with her husband. Tell him you only want to be friends, nothing more. If that does not work, be honest with your friend. Tell her exactly what happened, and tell her that you didn't tell her to cause problems between them. Suggest counseling, if they cannot work it out by themselves. Be supportive, and help your friend through any upcoming trials. Until them, limit your association with her husband.
2007-05-10 12:22:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
You made a big mistake when you waited for your
friend to come home as that gave the husband
the opportunity he was probably waiting for to
make a pass on you, even though it was not your
fault. Two years is not a very long time to know
someone that you are not involved with especially
a man as you don't know him very much since he
is married to your friend. If you tell your friend she
might think why did you wait for her in her house
when she was not there, why did you not just leave
and come back when she was at home, so just
keep your distance from her husband and ignore
him and if he passes at you again then you can
mention it to your friend. Just remember do not
put yourself in a position that you will find yourself
explaining what trully happened.
2007-05-10 16:05:17 · answer #2 · answered by RudiA 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is a true friend, you owe her the truth. Friends tell friends the truth and the friendship remains; however, yours is young and might not stand the test. Another position is she may have doubts about her husband and needs the confirmation. She might just want you to promise not to 'mess around' with him and you can still be friends. You could freak him by 'busting him'. For example, the next time you two are together and she is within ear shot say, so she can hear, "Are you trying to make a pass at me" with plenty of attitude. Either way, determine what is most important.
2007-05-10 12:25:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What's more important to you? Your friend, or this loser?
Would you want her to tell YOU if the shoe was on the other foot? Of course you would. She needs to know her husband is a slimeball, because if he'd make a move on her very best friend, who cares for her, then he's out there doing all kinds of rotten things, and SHE is going to get hurt. If you remain silent, you betray her. If you tell her, you hurt her, and worst case scenario get blamed if she believes him more than you, but in the end...YOU did the right thing by telling her. Follow your heart. Do the right thing.
2007-05-10 12:21:22 · answer #4 · answered by a_lot_smarter_now 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem with telling your friend is that she may not want to hear it. You could end up looking like the bad guy and lose a friendship. Even though you did nothing wrong, it's always easier to blame someone else than the man you love. I'd be very careful and think hard about telling her. It could backfire on you. Good Luck!
2007-05-10 16:54:00 · answer #5 · answered by ncgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you can invite your friend to dinner just her not her husband! And explain everything make sure u tell her you did nothing wrong! Dont let things get out of hand! And if you dont tell her you will probably start making excuses why you cant or dont want to go hang out with both of them someone is gunna start wondering something! Sooner is better then later! As crazy as it sounds u can suggest marrige counseling to them! I hope everything works out!
2007-05-10 12:22:58 · answer #6 · answered by luckiestgirlintheworld3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do is let her know exactly what happend, but in most cases the friend is going to be mad at you and not the spouse. You will feel better when you talk with her about it and of course he is going to deny it, but its worth a try. Stick to the facts and dont let her nor him intemidate you.
2007-05-10 12:22:25 · answer #7 · answered by Tonya J 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES! this guy is NO GOOD for her and is obviously a sleaze ball...he probably makes passes at many other women behind her back as well. if you are a good friend you will let her know so she can confront him on the issue and hopefully she will be smart enough to get rid of this low-life guy! that is just disgusting that he would do this to his wife and he isn't the type of guy that she deserves!!!
2007-05-10 12:21:33 · answer #8 · answered by Andy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well.....
If it were her at your house waiting for you....and your husband made a pass at her.....
would you want to know?
She's your friend, so you know best.
Chances are, you aren't the only one he has made a pass at.
I think in that situation I would want to know....but you're going to have to decide what's best for you.
I would REALLY hate to be in your situation right now!!
And I know how we crazy females can be sometimes, so don't you dare try to think that you cause this, or that it was somehow your fault!!!!
Good luck!
2007-05-10 12:24:11 · answer #9 · answered by jezyka 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should tell her for her sake, if the guy made a pass at you, what's to say he won't to someone else, and what's to say the other chick might even take up the offer.
Do it because you don't want her hurt.
2007-05-10 12:21:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋