Do I have the right to get upset or am I just over reacting?

Question

My fiancé and me have been together for about a year and a half. About a three month ago he started playing this game call RuneScape. He’s always playing this game and whenever I ask for us time he says “In a minute, in a minute” but in a minute never comes. He is so focus on this game that I have to yell at the top of my lungs to get his attention and then he tell me I’m bugging him. I’ve even tried sex to focus his attention to me but all he seems to care about is the game. Do I have the right to get upset or am I just over reacting?

Answer 1

I'd be upset. My 12 year old(and his friends) play Runescape.Wait..no..they stopped playing it because they thought it was GAY lol.......it's time for him to grow up and deal with the real world.

Answer 2

You call him your fiance but something tells me this is a living together situation and living together, marriage is never certain.
I can tell that you are spending time just watching him spend time on something else so that tells me you're living together, also.
Stop living together!
Move out and get moving with some real plans - he's escaping with RuneScape and you need to escape too.
How can he miss you when you're always there?
You think Runescape is the problem. It's not.
You need to move on so that he can catch up with you. Otherwise, he will continue to use this avoidance technique to avoid thinking or dealing with what is bothering him.
It's been three months, you say? Does this guy have a job? Do you? Do you have an education? Does he?
Time marches on and good things take time. Sounds like he's just passing time. But not with you.

Answer 3

That game is for little kids. Too much of anything can be addictive. I limit the kids time with this game and all others. Life is too short to live it all playing games. I suggest you sit down and talk sometime when he is not on it and suggest some time limits per day and also suggest activities you two can do together. If he says, in a minute, get an egg timer and set it next to him.

Answer 4

You definitely have the right to get upset. I dated a guy who was obsessed with that stupid game. I don't know why guys get so into that!?! He needs to grow up a little. It's ok to play video/computer games, but you need to know when to turn it off and focus on the real world. Tell him exactly how you feel. If he can't grow up, he doesn't need to be getting married and starting a family. Good luck!

Answer 5

I have the same problem but its Gears of War.

My BF and his best friends live for this game. They play online with each other. So me and the other girls subject to this now go out and leave the boys at home.

We take dance classes and on Friday night the boys play while we go to bar/lounge.

We did hope they would notice we were missing. But they did not.

One Friday we girls left at 9PM came back at 2AM. They were still playing and played until 4AM while we all fell asleep!

All we can do is hope they start to miss us and be glad we are the ones at the bar and not them. Because we behave when we are out!

Sigh. Good luck.

Answer 6

Unfortunately I think you're overreacting. I've been married for almost 10 years and I have learned that guys AND US WOMEN, need time to themselves. If you're shacked up (which I don't recommend because your chances of actually getting married lower if you are. Trust me on this!) then he may be getting a little too much of seeing you. You might want to be a bit thankful that he's not out at a stripclub instead.

Let him have his time, you do your thing too. Trust me, it'll make him happy AND it'll make him have to "chase" you again. Guys are still animalistic and they like to have to go after you. Know what I mean?!

Good luck and move out girl! Do your own thing, without him. Trust me, there will be times later on that you'd wish you'd been more independent. I'm glad I was; and still am, shoot!

Answer 7

This is a typical problem with men in their late 20's and 30's. Sit down and figure out how many hours he should be spending with his "hobby". When the time is up.. the time is up. I know it sounds like you are treating him like a child, but in fact he is acting like a child.

As far as that "fiance" thing goes. Do you have a ring on your finger and a date? If not he really is not your "fiance" you are just shacking up together. That sex thing didn't work because he already is thinking he has you hooked and you are too readily available even without a ring on your finger. I think you sold yourself cheap.

Answer 8

Go down to the power box, shut off the power, then while the game is off, get his attention and tell him its okay for him to play his game but he is addicted to the game and needs to learn to manage his time between you and the game or he will be making a choice between you and the game. Fact is if you need him even just to talk, he could pause the game or save it and turn it off. PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN NOW.

Answer 9

You are not over reacting. You have a right to be upset. Your fiancee is a boy, immature and preferring games to you, and if you feel that he will one day mature and be right for you, then you should stick with him now. But if you don't think he will ever grow up, then go find a man. A man will focus his every thought on you. So it is up to you. Will he grow up some day? That is what you must try to determine. . . .

Answer 10

Yes you have the right to get upset!!!! Do some research, these games are one of the top reasons for online affairs. Been there done that different game samething.

Answer 11

Of course you have the right to be upset! You should find something for yourself to do. Maybe once a week, go out with some friends. Sooner or later the game will end and then he will have time for you, so just wait it out, but enjoy yourself while you are waiting.