I was thinking about this as I have a friend that has to have everything perfect, and expects her friends/family to make things perfect for her as well. Is this stemming from something? Her childhood was good, but is it hiding insecurity or something else? What does perfectionism result from? She's ultra competitive too, very Type A.
2007-05-10 10:22:30 · 7 answers · asked by Keep It Sane 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Is seems like there are certainly unrealistic expectations and a lack of understanding of things that she has no control over. Like a childhood that was so taken care of and so sheltered, and now as an adult expects everything to come easy as well.
2007-05-10 11:00:24 · update #1
It's a reflection of insecurity, and also fear, the perfectionist has alot of fear around the idea of something being screwed up, and a fear of not being enough, by not being perfect, according to some usually very tough idea of "perfection". Somewhere along the line she was told that who she is, is not enough. Sometimes people get that way, as a control issue also, every thing needs to be just so, and if one little thing doesn't measure up, then everything is out of control to them...... It is also possible that your friend has obsessive compulsive disorder....
2007-05-10 10:44:50 · answer #1 · answered by beatlefan 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The perfectionists I have known are that way because they were ultra-criticised as children, and never rewarded for their efforts....only for their performance (some didn't even get that). Having a messy house, for instance, really does disturb their happiness. They have deep issues. They need acceptance. It is unlikely they will be able to completely change their ways, and just accept themselves "as is", but sometimes loving but firm direction (as well as appreciation) can help to tone them down a little.
2007-05-10 10:45:50 · answer #2 · answered by MumOf5 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perfectionism can be reflective of insecurity or lack of control in someone's life. It can also just be a personality characteristic. I have known people who were perfectionists since they were babies. Others are perfectionists to compensate for insecurities.
2007-05-10 10:29:46 · answer #3 · answered by Simmy 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I like to think of it as a sort of "disorder" that I myself don't meet the qualifications for.To me its definitely a mask for misery,when its taken to the extreme.There is nothing wrong with excelling and trying to be your personal best,however,where do you draw the line on being your personal best and putting so many demands and expectations on yourself you become a "burden" to yourself and others?
2007-05-10 10:50:04 · answer #4 · answered by FYIIM1KO 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
insecurity for sure, if you weren't you wouldn't have to go out of your way to tell people how great you are
2007-05-10 10:31:42 · answer #5 · answered by Matt G 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, perfectionists hide bodies. But since they are perfectionists, they do it perfectly and you'll never find them
2007-05-10 10:31:25 · answer #6 · answered by sharkbite321 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
really good question it seems to make a lot of sense
2007-05-10 10:55:08 · answer #7 · answered by Lobster 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋