baby shower issues help me!?

Question

At my work, a coworkers wife is having a baby and naturally all of the ladies at work are invited to the baby shower. Im young and trying to get by, and all of the women at work want everyone to pay 40 dollars to chip in for a baby stroller. call me cheap but I really dont want to pay that much for someone i never even met, plus im new at this place.
I also dont even want to go!! Help! how do i get out of going with a group of hens, and paying 40 dollars? should I just suck it up!

Answer 1

We have the same problem at work...110 nurses and someone's always pregnant,engaged,graduating,whatever....I can't shell out $10-$20 every time. $40 is completely unreasonable (how many women are doing this? what kind of stroller is this? does it walk the baby for you?).

What I would do is be honest....say "I'd really like to join you, but $40 is more than I had hoped to spend. I've picked out a gift for her already, so I'm all set...but thank you so much for including me!"

Then, I'd look to see if she registered for a baby tub....they're usually fairly inexpensive, $10-$20, and their a substantial gift and one you use a lot in the first year. If it's closer to $10, then you can throw in a rubber ducky or find some baby wash/baby lotion on sale (and use a coupon!) or you can find some cute washcloths or towels....put them in the tub and put a big bow on the whole thing....voila! $20-$25 and a great gift sure to be used by her a great deal!

The other thing I usually do is go to the stores and check the clearance racks....they're usually not this season, so buy an outfit a couple of sizes bigger (for example, for a baby born in May, I'd buy a cute outfit with a light sweater or long sleeved shirt in the 3-6 month or 6-9month size....). Parents get so many newborn and 0-3 month clothes that the baby almost never gets to wear them all...and then it really looks like you know what you're doing because you're thinking of the long-term needs.

Also, I would just say that you can't go....it's probably a weekend and people often have family things on weekends, so they'll understand (also, when you invite people that you don't know....aren't you really just looking for gifts?). If I knew the dad more, I'd think about getting a gift that dad would think is cool....we got a cute "toolkit" that was stuffed and the "tools" were rattles and squeakers, and my husband thought it was great....or get a sports outfit or hat...then the gift is really more for the person you know....

Answer 2

What kind of stroller is this and how many people. 40 strikes me as high, per person, escpecially if there are 10 or so? Id get some more details, then Ill give you a better answer. It is easy to spend over $200 on a stroller, but the majority of people dont. The most I usually spend on a baby shower gift, is $25, and my friends and I do pretty well for ourselves.

Anyway - just lie and say you have other plans for the weekend.

You could do a creative gift too for a lot less. For example most new parent dont realize how many C and D batteries they will fly thru on swings and mobiles and bouncy seats. At 3 in the morning, when she needs some sleep, and the only thing to fix that is the swing, and it just ran out of batteries - she'll think you're the best give giver EVER!

Answer 3

You don't know the person and you don't want to go. I'd definitely tell the person collecting the money that you aren't going because you don't know her. It's nothing to feel bad about. $40 is way too much anyways, even if you did know her. A stroller is usually something bought by the grandparents. A better suggestion would have been to send a note around the office mentioning the shower and if anyone wanted to chip in, they could. A set dollar amount is unreasonable to ask because not everyone in the office makes the same amount. Do not go if you don't want to. I wouldn't.

Answer 4

say oh I'm sorry i already bought a gift and get a cute cheap outfit for the baby, or a few receiving blankets then you'll spend like 5 or 10 dollars i wouldn't want to do it either 40 dollars for someone you don't know that's kinda weird. and how many girls are chipping in because a stroller in like 150 to 200 dollars why would everyone be paying 40 be careful it sounds like they are trying to use you. good luck Hun.

Answer 5

well, i dont know how many "hens" there are but chipping in 40 dollars for a stroller, would mean that your getting a really exspensive stroller and thats not neccessary. When i have to go to a shower that i personally could care less about, I usually go to big lots, wal-mart or K-mart, buy a pack of neutral onesies, a pack of bigs, cute little socks or a blanket. I would buy two things just to not look cheap, and i mean c'mon she can't be that rude as to be offended seeing how you just started there. One other really cute thing to get for someone who is expecting is a clay hand mold. They sell them at walmart for $10 and thats something that is a keepsake once she uses it.
I hope this helps. I would definelty not go in on the stroller, it just sounds like they want to reduce the price they are chipping in on it.
Good luck

Answer 6

Is she registered somewhere? Lie and say you heard she was registered and you already got something. Then get something cute but cheap.
Then say you have a dentist appt or something and that if you reschedule they won't be able to get you in for over a month.

If you really want to get away with this AND look fabulous, get something that seems thoughtful and knowledgeable. For instance, get a swaddler from Wal Mart (around $10??) and say you have heard these help the baby sleep better and you know she'll need sleep. Get 2 or get something else in the same color just so you don't look cheap.

Answer 7

Don't go. Or go, but give her a card or something. There's nothing that says you are obligated to spend $40 on someone you hardly know just because other people are. I'm sorry, but I wouldn't spend $40 on a gift for a friend at a baby shower. My budget can't handle that. I would say, just don't go. Tell them you have something else to do that day.

Answer 8

just be honest, you don't have the money. Ask if you can give a smaller donation or buy a present seperate from the group gift. I don't think anyone will think less of you for being young and poor.
If the shower is not at work, don't go. Tell them you have a dentist appt of something.

Answer 9

You don't have to go if you don't want to, at my old job we had stuff going on all the time like that, if I couldn't afford it at that time then I would tell whoever was in charge of the function. Sometimes I would give 5 dollars or less depending on what it was for and how much money I had at the time. Just do whatever makes you feel comfortable

Answer 10

Don't go.

If you want to stay in the pregnant person's good graces, you might get a sweet card, and let her know that if she needs anything to just ask (she most likely won't take you up on it).

Make sure that you give her the card ~before~ the shower, and tell her that you are otherwise engaged, or that you don't know everyone yet and felt more comfortable giving it to her one-on-one.