if you are gonna say it doesn't , don't bother answering cause it is a proven fact that it does. if your one of the few lucky ones to dispell the myth, hoorah for you, answer a question that has to do with your marriage phenomenon.
2007-05-10 05:35:59 · 14 answers · asked by rockstarhooligan 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
According to science it is all chemical. Once the chemicals balance out over time, the euphoria caused by that chemical imbalance dissipates and you are left with bland, generic life.
If your marriage is based primarily on the passion it will suffer at this point. If the marriage is based on a deeper friendship it will change, but likely be okay.
Anyway, that's why, according to scientists anyway.
2007-05-10 05:41:06 · answer #1 · answered by btpage0630 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The so-called "flame" in marriage is not a form of love, but rather, infatuation: gazing at your endearing other through rose-colored glasses, oblivious of his or her faults and flaws. On average, it lasts about two years. That is why it is recommended for couples to date (not living or sleeping together, which halts the process) at a minimum of two years before the I do's. By that time, the rose-colored glasses come off and you can see at last whether or not this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.
If married before two years, you are still seeing that person on a pedestal, and when the flame dies, the truth becomes plain. However, that does not mean the marriage will not work! Emotions are shifty and, most of the time, cannot be trusted, and certainly not intended for the basis, the foundation, of a life-long marriage. There are days I do not like my husband, but we are bonded physically, emotionally, and spiritually, our dependence on God, and I will always love him. Love is not an emotion that flames out, but an open, honest, respectful union between a man and a woman.
2007-05-10 12:51:03 · answer #2 · answered by Meg S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage comes to full circle many times in a relationship. Flames are high and then it is low again, and something then triggers it to high again. It is because as we grow older together, life does change, Jobs stress, Kids, Financial stress, stressful life, physically change (gain a few extra pounds) etc. Even though we are married we still do change as a person as we grow older. It is wrong to believe that you are still married to the same person, cause you both have changed. So you both need to discover yourselves again, that in itself should trigger some spark. You have to keep working on keeping the flame alive in your marriage, its an effort you both have to make. Good luck.
2007-05-10 12:51:26 · answer #3 · answered by jimmy.parker06 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because you both get so comfortable and don't feel the need to try so hard. But you should keep trying new things so it keeps you marriage interesting. Take up new hobbies together, try things in the bedroom that you haven't tried before, and even go out without each other once in a while so you don't get bored with one another.
2007-05-10 12:41:41 · answer #4 · answered by #1 Lucy Fan 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
because the excitement of the unknown leaves after a while. i've been married 13 years and we rarely have sex and when we do, it is just going through the motions. i fantasize as i'm sure he does. i miss the passion we once had but i don't think it will ever happen again because we have both lost interest. marriage is more than the sex and you should think about that. try as i have to spice it up, but it will simply leave again because the newness dies.
2007-05-10 12:42:44 · answer #5 · answered by sophia a 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I am going on 30 years..And yes there have been ups and downs..But its that way even if you ain't married to someone.The flame dies out because it takes work to keep it lit..Someone needs to be the keeper of the flame and if no one is watching it will go out...Marriage doesn't work without work...Mine has been worth every spark.....
2007-05-10 12:55:13 · answer #6 · answered by Dixie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The flame dies down because they let it. If you keep things interesting, treat each other with respect, do fun things together, go on date nights, dress up once in a while, etc. the flame wont die down.
2007-05-10 12:42:56 · answer #7 · answered by Kari R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lust and love are two separate things. Hopefully you are mature enough to let your lust change over in to love. Lust never ever lasts. That's why everyone gets a divorce. They think they're not in love, but what they aren't is in "lust".
Marriage is dull if you don't understand what it's all about and what it really means.
2007-05-10 12:42:16 · answer #8 · answered by Aiden 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing in this world will last! Happiness, sadness, passion, love... It'll faded eventually. There isn't any real answer for this question. But this leads to other question... Will you just accept this or do something about it...?
2007-05-10 12:43:06 · answer #9 · answered by minime_risk 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It has to, for the sake of our species. You can't be only after sex all the time, you have to change to be protective to your wife and offspring. Its all about doing the best thing for the family.
2007-05-10 12:55:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋