I'm definatly going to wait for him, and I'd never cheat on him, but does anyone have some advise on good ways to get through this?
2007-05-10 01:57:20 · 17 answers · asked by ~*~Fuzzie~*~ 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm definatly going to wait for him, and I'd never cheat on him, but does anyone have some advise on good ways to get through this? Things like this are pretty stressful for someone who is only 17.
2007-05-10 02:00:59 · update #1
He didn't do anything to hurt anyone or get anyone else in trouble, so I'm not mad. He did make a stupid choice in doing what he did, and he's paying for it. But I don't want to loose him. He has told me that he would understand if I wanted to find someone else, he even said he thought I should. But the issue is that I do love him, and no one else.
2007-05-10 02:15:15 · update #2
Visit him often.
2007-05-10 01:59:50 · answer #1 · answered by star_lite57 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on the reason he is going to jail. Was it a deliberate act that caused injury to someone like a DUI that caused a death? Drugs? Abuse, physical, sexual? Being in the wrong place at the wrong time? Things like that make a difference as to whether you should WAIT or not. Don't know your ages, if there are kids involved, etc. but this is not a good way to start out a life together.
You need to step back and take a look at the history there as if you were an outsider. What's your life going to be like if he continues on this path? Perspective can help you decide. Forgiveness is definitely a good thing but you have to use judgment and not allow yourself to become a victim of circumstance. If he's abusive, it doesn't usually get better. It may for a while but they usually revert back to their patterns.
2007-05-10 02:06:57 · answer #2 · answered by Light'ninbug 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep an open mind. Trust me, he has no choice but to wait for you.
You, on the other hand, may find that at 17 it is difficult to make sound decisions about love and committment. It is very possible you'll lose interest in him. I'm all for forgiving mistakes. But don't sell yourself short with the whole, "he is doing his time," thing. People that commit crimes often don't have the morals to do the right thing...jail time shouldn't be a deterrent, proper human behavior should. I'm not saying he's a bad person. I'm saying that at 17, the last thing you need is this kind of suitor.
2007-05-10 02:33:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself the following questions:
How long will he be away?
How can I put my life on hold for that amount of time?
What goals would I be putting off in waiting
What guarantee will I have that he will change and stay out of prison in the future?
What kind of life will I have with this guy?
Will he be able to get/keep a good job when he's free?
Life is short and you are young, these years are too precious to waste, this is the time to plan your future and make career choices for yourself. Consider the above questions carefully and objectively-good luck.
2007-05-10 02:06:30 · answer #4 · answered by Maria b 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are only 17 and will find someone else. Don't waste your life waiting around on some felon. How is he going to ever get a real job once out? How will help support you? Chances are if you wait around for this guy, you better be ready to financially support him once he is out. Because he is not going to help you. Run while you can....
2007-05-10 05:08:51 · answer #5 · answered by Texas Happy Horn 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Waiting for someone who will be incarcerated is easier said than done. His life is on hold because he broke the law. Why should your life be wasted waiting for someone who will be gone? When he does get out, his jobs will be limited, since you cannot have really good ones with a felony, not to mention he cannot ever vote again. You did not say for what or how long.
2007-05-10 02:04:20 · answer #6 · answered by treasuredwife69 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to decide if you wanna ride it out with him. He chose to break the law. He's the one that really has to deal with it. You can love someone for their entire life but don't you have needs? Who's needs are more important? I'm not saying to go out immediately and look for a new Boo but don't pass up a good thing if it comes along. Do you, Boo!
2007-05-10 02:05:20 · answer #7 · answered by Sunshine! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on what he is going to prison for... Do you want your lifelong partner to be a criminal? I mean it doesn't sound like overdue parking tickets. So how great of a guy could he really be if he engages in illegal activity. Is this man someone you want your children to look up to? Also.. ask yourself if you deserve better... don't settle for the least common denominator.
2007-05-10 02:03:38 · answer #8 · answered by Amy C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear of this and I'm glad you decided to wait for him. Think of the story which inspired the song "Tie a yellow ribbon". Everyone makes mistakes and as long as he's sorry and won't do it again, he deserves a 2nd chance. Your friends will be polarized by this. Mix with those who support you and avoid those with negative vibes. Write him letters, tell him what you do in your everyday life. Do things to keep you busy, visit him if it's allowed. If you're studying, concentrate on your studies and don't let your grades slip. Stay strong and all the best.
2007-05-10 02:04:29 · answer #9 · answered by Sandy 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Oh my gosh you are too young to put your life on hold for this person. Why is he going to prison? How long is he in for?
Your life is precious and this could be a way of escape for you. You need to live life to it's fullest. This is not a wise decision.
2007-05-10 02:10:04 · answer #10 · answered by Been There Done That 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You didn't indicate that you thought he was not guilty. That said you need to get out of the relationship. His behavior today should tell you his future behavior. If that is what you want for your future don't complain about the wait, you asked for it.
2007-05-10 02:03:21 · answer #11 · answered by Mickey S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋