Is 20 too young to sit down and plan a baby?

Question

My fiance is determined we should have a child soon (don't worry he's not an immigrant.....lol!!!!!) He's 25, and I think he has been influenced by the fact that his mum and dad had him about this age.
I personally would like to too, but i have a 9-5 job, good pay, and probabally would be able to go part time if nessessary.

Maybe I just dont know what would happen financially. I mean, we have council tax to pay etc. I think I'm just looking for answers from someone who has been there and done that......

Answer 1

Hi Sandi, In my opinion...?
i think it is too early for you. I do not think that because ofyour age cz i dont think there is ever an 'age' where you can handle a baby. it all depends on the person.
the fact that you are facing all this uncertainty about having a baby illustrates that you are not ready to face it.
the fact that you r a smart and mature person with a fixed job and a long term relationship and engaged to him means that you are in the right track; a baby born will be born into a financially sound and loving family. I just think you need more time to think about it, you will know when you want to have a baby, you will just WANT it that is does not matter giving up work for a while or going part time. you will be glad to do it and will feel this determination and knowledge that everything financially will work itself out because you want it so much.
if you give in to your fiance n have a baby now (with you still being uncertain) should you come into a financial problem you will resent yourself and maybe the baby too? Maybe your fiance for wanting to have a baby?
i think give it a couple of years. maybe in three years time? and in the mean time you should try save up a bit of money on the side. its doesnt have to be much, just what you can per month etc so that i a few years time when you are ready for a baby, you will have the financial means to get into it smoothly. do not underestimate the cost of a baby. to have one with no money on the side will be a bit of a shock, which is why saving in advance will make the transition easier.
Good luck to you girl.

Answer 2

Not too young, A 20yrs old is an adult; Though your extent of maturity is important. It is important that you further your education as you are already thinking, (it appears you already have some savings)

2) You can still further your education while raising your kid (if your fiance assists you, but start first b4 d baby comes) the first 3yrs might be difficult but you will manage if you follow the right steps, especially if you your spouse has a fairly well paid job.

BUT wait :
DOES HE WANT THE BABY outside marriage? WHY NOT WAIT TILL YOU ARE MARRIED? That which truely belongs to you, you certainly dont rush to eat. DONT RUSH INTO IT OR YOU WILL RUSH OUT OF IT
He is only a fiance - You might have this baby now and days later he becomes someone else's fiance and then HUSBAND (how important would you feel then). And you - a single mother

BABIES ARE NOT TOYS - you have to be sure you want it. Every child deserves attention from both parents, they need support. If you are focused on giving your child the best, with your financial status you can achieve it.

It appears he wants to be a responsible dad and he loves you, but THINK and take it one step after another.

Cheers.

Answer 3

20 is not too young to "plan" for a baby, but its about 5 years too young to give birth to one.

Most young couples are not ready for the financial stresses of raising an infant. The fact that you'd plan to go part time "if necessary", means you will feel the hit financially. Do the kid a favor, not just think about yourself and your "wants", and be as prepared as you can be for this. In five years, you'll both be making substantially more money and you'll be a lot more mature. Therefore, if you are more mature and making more intelligent responses to the child's actions, then you raise a more mature, intelligent child.

Most kids who have the feeling that they can be whatever they want to at the age of 18 (when your baby turns 18), is because their parents were older and smarter (when the child was born) as the now-confident child goes off to his/her college of choice to pursue an education and life that the other 18 yr old children of younger parents (at child's birth) are envious of whether they'll admit it or not. A better education means more choices. Just getting a college degree isn't enough to land a partnership or CEO position in a major corporation, what also holds a lot of weight is "which" college you went to for your Master's Degree.

Give your child a fighting chance by having enough discipline to wait until YOU are smarter, more mature and truly financially ready.
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Answer 4

I had my first child at the age of 20 and my fiance is 27 so I dont think this is too young but depending on where you are in your life and your maturity level at 20. Im now pregnant with my 2nd at 21. Its a good idea to travel, party and do all the things you ever wanted to do first. Although there is life after kids, (I go out almost every week at least once with my friends) there is restictions and boundaries, now there are schedules, routines, times you can go out and times you have to be back ect. I miss being spontanious, being able to go away for the weekend without planning for months beforehand! I wouldnt change my son for the world though and I love him to bits! My advise would be to live a little first! You have plenty of time, good luck. x

Answer 5

Hi... I got married at 19 and had my first when i was 20. When i look back now i do regret that I didnt live a bit before but on th eplus side me and my baby boy had so much fun. I dont feel i was too young. My hubby was 25 when we had our son too. He had a good job and so did i... However i swapped and got a waitressing job when he was born so i could spend all day with him when he was awake and i went to work when he was asleep.
It is really hard but you will get there eventually.. Good luck.x

Answer 6

i'm going to tell you factor sparkling. be certain you get training which will land you a job and a powerful companion and you're set to have a toddler. do not placed the cart in the previous the horse-in different phrases ideally have an excellent interest and companion first. in this international that's approximately getting safeguard employment and trusting and loving those your with. you do not want the warfare. in case you want to be a nurse as an occasion...that's safeguard employment and in case you get out of high school at 17-18 that's feasible to be employed as a nurse by ability of 23 years of age. in case you are trying this your dad would be proud and could go away you on my own.

Answer 7

A baby means an increase in spending! Heavy!
If you can weather that, and if you can make a pact as to who will do the burping, and changing diapers, and waking up in the middle of the night, then, there's no reason not to
Except of course, the marriage angle... do you want the child to be borm in or out of wedlock ?

Answer 8

as long as ur happy and u know that u will cope with the baby.uve got 2 be sure that u can look after ur baby as in financaly(soz i spelt that wrong)but as long as ur gonna love that child-then good luck.wel i wld have thought that young ppl wld want a career but if ur happy 2 have a child the congratulation and i wish u all th best in the future.if ur family and friends r supportive then uve got a gd chance 2 raise a baby

Answer 9

Your definately not too young - if thats what you feel you both want to do, do it! - As someone else has said it took their mum and dad a while to conceive! - Our first child we had no problem with conceiving atall whereas our second took us about three years! - Plans dont always work out as you would want them - we dont live in an ideal world! - You could always be putting it off until one day you could look back and say 'i wanted children but it never happened' - go for it! :) - You will manage, everyone does!

Answer 10

I personally think that 20 is too young, you both have plenty of time for that! Go travelling and experience new things! You are not going to be able to do that if you have a baby so young!
But if you both think you are physically and mentally ready then go for it!
good luck!