To muslims?

Question

Please explain the ways of marriage and divorce. I know it, but want to make it clear to everyone else. How do you feel about it? What does it mean for you?

Answer 1

Praise be to Allah, the most gracious, most merciful. Surely Allah is uncomparable and has blessed our ummah with the best relegion. Alhamdulillah

Marriage. To early for me :) but then its the biggest event in one's life. By getting married you are not just getting a wife, you are getting your whole world. From now until the rest of your days your wife will be your partner, your companion, and your best friend.

She will share your moments, your days, and your years. She will share your joys and sorrows, your successes and failures, your dreams and your fears. When you are ill, she will take the best care of you; when you need help, she will do all she can for you;

When you have a secret, she will keep it; when you need advice, she will give you the best advice. She will always be with you: when you wake up in the morning the first thing your eyes will see will be hers; during the day, she will be with you, if for a moment she is not with you by her physical body, she will be thinking of you, praying for you with all her heart, mind, and soul; when you go to sleep at night, the last thing your eyes will see will be her; and when you are asleep you will still see her in your dreams. In short, she will be your whole world and you will be her whole world.

The best description that I personally have ever read describing the closeness of the spouses to each other is the Qur'anic verse which says: "they are your garments and you are their garments" (Surah Al Baqarah 2:187). Indeed, spouses are like garments to each other because they provide one another with the protection, the comfort, the cover, the support, and the adornment that garments provide to humans. Just imagine a journey in the winter of Alaska without garments! Our spouses provide us with the same level of comfort, protection, cover, and support in the journey of our lives on this earth as garments would do in the Alaskan journey.

The relationship between the spouses is the most amazing of all human relations: the amount of love and affection, intimacy and closeness, mercy and compassion, peace and tranquillity that fills the hearts of the spouses is simply inexplicable. The only rational explanation for these most amazing of all human feelings is that: it is an act of Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala, "And Allah has made for you Mates (and Companions) of your own nature ..." (Surah Al Nahl 16:72) Only our Almighty Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala in His Infinite Power, Boundless Mercy, and Great Wisdom can create and ingrain these amazing and blessed feelings in the hearts of the spouses. In fact Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala is reminding those who search for His signs in the universe that these feelings in the hearts of the spouses are among the signs that should guide humans to His existence as He says in the Qur'an, "And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquillity with them and He has put love and mercy between your hearts: verily in that are signs for those who reflect." (Surah Al Rum 30:21)

But Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala knows that the human heart is not a static entity, it is sometimes weak and at times dynamic. Feelings can and do change with time. Love may wither and fade away. The marital bond might weaken if not properly cared for. Happiness in marriage cannot be taken for granted; continuous happiness requires constant giving from both sides. For the tree of marital love to remain alive and keep growing, the soil has to be sustained, maintained, watered and nurtured.

Remember that our Prophet Muhammad Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam had found the time to go out to the desert and race with his wife Aisha. She out ran him but later after she had gained some weight, he out ran her.

Remember that the Prophet Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam took his wife to watch the young Ethiopians playing and dancing their folk dances. The show of emotions is necessary to keep the marital bond away from rusting and disintegrating.

Remember that you will be rewarded by Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala for any emotions you show to your wife as the Prophet Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam said "one would be rewarded for anything that he does seeking the pleasure of Allah even the food that he puts in the mouth of his wife."

Never underestimate the importance of seemingly little things as putting food in your wife's mouth, opening the car's door for her, etc. Remember that the Prophet Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam used to extend his knee to his wife to assist her up to ride the camel.

Try to always find some time for both of you to pray together. Strengthening the bond between you and Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala is the best guarantee that your own marital bond would always remain strong. Having peace with Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala will always result in having more peace at home.

Remember that the Prophet Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam gave glad tidings for those couples who wake up at night to pray together. The Prophet Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam even urged the spouse who rises up first to wake the other spouse up even by throwing cold water on his/her face.

Always try your best to be good to your wife by words and by deeds. Talk to her, smile to her, seek her advice, ask for her opinion, spend quality time with her and always remember that the Prophet Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam said "the best of you are those who are best to their wives."

Finally, it is common that spouses vow to love and honor their spouses until death do them part. I do believe that this vow is good or even great, but not enough! It is not enough that you love your wife. You have to love what she loves as well. Her family, her loved ones must also become your loved ones. Don't be like my colleague who was unhappy about his wife's parents coming to visit for few weeks. He candidly said to her "I don't like your parents." Naturally, she angrily looked at him straight in the eye and said " I don't like yours either"... Also, it is not enough that you love her until death do you part. Love should never end and we do believe there is life after death where those who did righteousness in this world will be joined by their spouses (Surah Al Zukhruf 43:70) and offsprings.

The best example in this regard is the Prophet Salallaahu 'aliahi wa'sallaam whose love for Khadija, his wife of 25 years extended to include all those she loved and continued even after her death. It was many years after her death and he never forgot her and whenever a goat was slaughtered in his house he would send portions of it to Khadija's family and friends and whenever he felt that the visitor at the door might be Khadija's sister Hala, he would pray saying "O Allah let it be Hala."

Answer 2

Islam made marriage a social act rather than a religious one like in Christianity.
Marriage if considered as a religious act, has no possibility of separation, Divorce.
But when Islam has made it a social act, so divorce is allowed, but the most disliked act in front of Allah almighty among halal acts.
By the permission of divorce, Islam waved off the rigidity in marriage, that may cause people be together without marriage (premarital sex) like Christian society gave birth to boy friend, girl friend and love children.

Answer 3

Marriage, for me, is the ultimate promise you can make to another person. It means trust, love, loyalty, compassion, passion, support, faith, devotion, dedication, commitment and PATIENCE. Promising to my husband and to Allah that I would love, honor and respect my husband is one of the most meaningful things I have ever done.

Divorce is an unfortunate alternative when a marriage fails to work, and I have experienced that also. My first wedding was legal and not religious and did not have the same strength and commitment as my new marriage. I married for all of the wrong reasons and experienced many hardships. After 7 years of struggling I opted for a divorce so I could finally be free and happy, and begin my search for myself and what I really wanted in my life. I have that now, and I have no regrets.

Answer 4

He who marries secures one half of his religion, so let him beware of Allah where the other half is concerned.

(This also shows that marriage is esteemed as a precaution against misconduct, providing security from corruption; for what most often corrupts a man's religion is his genitals and his belly, and by marrying he takes care of one of these at least.)

The work of a human being is all cut short, but for three things: a righteous child who prays for him, alms he has dispensed, and religious knowledge he has imparted.

(The first of these is attainable only by way of marriage.)

Divorce in every religion is controversial. On one hand, it brings about the disintegration of family life with consequent unhappiness for the children born of that marriage. On the other hand, dissolution of marriage might be desirable when the spouses can no longer live in harmony and have lost all mutual respect for one another.
the Quran prescribes them "Divorce", only if the problems are severe.

"If they disagree and must part, Allah (The God) will provide abundance for all from His all reaching bounty. For Allah is He who cares for all and is wise.” (Quran sura 4, aya 130).

However, every attempt should be made to solve these differences, since Islam does not approve of divorce on frivolous grounds. There must be a valid and significant reason for a disruption of this sacred bond to occur.

Answer 5

There has to be consent to marriage from both the husband and wife; forced marriages are not allowed. Both the husband and wife have rights over eachother......about divorce men and women have the right to obtain divorce. The laws are really fair and especially considering that this was the 7th century and even in the 21st century these laws fit perfectly its amazing to me.

Answer 6

If I answer this, it will be a very looooooong passage...anyway I give chance to others...

Habayeb gif good answers so is terry g and brother Muhammad...