I share my front steps with neighbor I don't like. Her friends keep sitting on my steps. What should I do?

Question

They've lived here forever and have friends and family all over the place. I'm new and don't want to cause trouble because they'll probably end up keying my car or something. That's what kind of people they are. Her kids keep hanging on my railing and making it loose and they spill crap all over my steps. I cannot confront them because she'll start yelling and screaming and cursing in my face.

Answer 1

There is no logical solution to a problem with someone you hate. Steven Covey has a concept in his "7 Habits of Highly Effective People" and the most important to my mind is the concept of an "Emotional Bank Account". You have to genuinely care about a person before any interaction will truly be synergistic. There's lose/lose, lose/win, win/lose, win/win, and then there's synergy which surpasses all of the rest. It's the best logical answer. If you'd prefer rather than not to befriend them, then the tension will always be there. That's not pleasant, That's not what I really want. This may be a calling from a source unknown speaking that it will be in your best interest to expand the mind here. The more that you care about one another, the more you'll want to please one another. In other words, if you hate someone, everything they do annoys you. But if you're in love, even if someone does something that would be really bad to you, it's not so bad. You love them. It makes all of the difference. I'd intend to have a very pleasing conversation with them on my way up the steps the next time I saw them, or atleast something nice to them the next time I was climbing the steps if I'm not the type of person to do those types of things yet. Eventually when you understand one another better, and care for one another more you'll find your tolerance and enjoyment with your new place of residency and the neighbors contained therein to be a very satisfying and pleasing set of experiences for you.

Answer 2

I think you need to do one of two things...talk to the property manager or move. As a tenant you have a right for some peace and quiet. Your property manager should be the one dealing with this. Make sure you "write" a letter to the manager as well. Managers realize that you 'mean business' when you put it in writing.

I advised you to go to the manager or find a new place because you said that if you say something to the neighbor, she'll start shouting in your face. Since you say this, evidently you've already tried talking to the kid's mother before, or you're afraid to afraid to confront her.

Then that's the very reason you should go to the manager.
And i mean it when I say "put your complaint in writng".
If the manager does not do anything, then complain to the city and let them handle it.

Answer 3

Is it possible to put potted plants or a little fence to divide your sides of the steps? It may seem petty but maybe you can fence it off and put a little gate up to keep them out. Otherwise put tons of flower pots on your side and maybe a little trash bin between your two sides...the messy people should take the hint. You could always call the police if they are being noisy and disturbing you in the evening.

Answer 4

This is a revision in responce to the additional info you have given. I'd like to apoligise for being mean earlyer, but I used to have a VERY mean neighbor who always would call the cops on my friends when they went out side to smoke a cigoret on the frount steps of our duplex. She was nosie and told my boyfriend I was sleeping around and such which wasen't true, I guess I had the tv turned up to loud or something... she was mean and even though I diden't keep the best company at the time she could have done the decent thing and asked them to be quiet insted of just calling the cops to the house all the time. She diden't even try to comunicate. Your initial question triggered memorys of her and that is why I origonaly responed in such a mean way. Really, if you want those people to be nice your going to have to try and find some way to get along with your neighbor. It might not be posible but if you are nice maybe it will help. agin, I'm super sorry I was mean, I diden't know the entire story because you diden't use enugh detail. All you said was you diden't like her and diden't want her friends on your shared steps... So Sorry, I'm not normaly that mean its just the way you phrased the question kind of made me mad...



To readdress your question I still don't know enugh, why don't you get along with her? maybe insted of her friends staying off the steps you could ask if she would ask her kids not to hang on the rail, and ask her to have her kids pick up after themselves. really its all about how you aproch the situation and your willingness to compromise. If she yells at you and is compleatly irational you should ask the land lord to talk to her, the land lord could also talk to her if you are afraid too but really it would be better to do it your self, just make sure its at a time when she is not busy. maybe if you take her a peace offering it would help, like some fresh baked cookies or something....

Answer 5

that is a toughy because they are both of your steps. so all you can do is politely ask them to sit on her side. if that don't work talk to landlord about it.

one time the same situation happened to me but the people just got up and moved when they realized i was home.

Answer 6

get a few flower pots and put them on the sides so there sless room to sit - then maybe over water them so the steps are wet

Answer 7

put something on those steps to keep them away, like plants or if that doesn't cover enough of the steps, just spill something real gross there lol. they will either wash your steps or leave, either way you're good to go.

Answer 8

I have had alot of trouble with my neighboors(a rental house next door)and the best thing to do is to ignore them and act like they don't live there. Or if you both are renting tell the landlord to talk to them.

Answer 9

Try having your friends sit there first. You might also try washing them with a bleach solution, once they get it on their clothing they'll not sit there to often.

Answer 10

Tell her you need some space, and if you want me to respect ur space, than we need to work this out.

2) Look lady, move your *** off my side of the concrete

3) I need some room, please be respectful when you have guests over

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