i'm wondering what others think. at work, people seem to want to throw a shower or party for every event (bridal shower, baby shower, birthdays), and automatically, its a spread everyone bring a dish and a gift. or lets take them out to eat and everyone chip in. who thinks you are obligated to do it? is it rude if you decline? sometimes there's co-workers you just don't like, do you still have to spend money on them bc its expected?
2007-05-09 09:27:18 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I think that sucks too. I hate it mainly because of the money rather than the fact that I don't like the people. If you have a good friend there, why don't the two of you go together on a small gift to make it at least a little cheaper. Or suggest that everyone contribute a few dollars and get an office gift for the person. It is hard to not participate when it is a pot luck, share a dish, etc. at the office. However you can certainly choose not to go to a restaurant.
I worked in a large office once when the supervisor had a baby. My goodness you would think it was the Queen having a baby. Big baby shower. Flowers for the hospital room. Flowers for when she got home from her longggggg 2 day stay in the hospital. Everyday someone was collecting money. I started leaving my purse in the car.
2007-05-09 10:53:58 · answer #1 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At my current job, no--we don't throw showers/parties/etc. for coworkers unless it's something small and outside the office and we pay for it ourselves. The only thing we do that's firm wide (I work at a mid-sized law office--about 100 employees here) is our monthly birthday party. Once a month, the firm pays for birthday cakes to be brought in and we celebrate the birthdays of everyone who was born that month.
At my last job, it was a much smaller office, and we did (quite often) what you're describing. It really depends on how large your office is--do you have 5 coworkers or 50? If it's a really small office, not contributing will make you look bad--cheap, unfriendly, etc. If it's a larger office, just tell them any time something like this comes up, that money's tight and you can't contribute as much as you'd like. Either donate a small amount of money or (in the case of buying a gift) something inexpensive, yet tasteful. If you decide not to do anything, you shouldn't go out to eat or enjoy the potluck--eat at your desk or do your own thing.
2007-05-09 09:58:37 · answer #2 · answered by brevejunkie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not required to participate in office social gatherings. You can go about your campaign of non-participation two ways, depending on how you choose to interrelate with colleagues:
1) Join in the festivities most of the time, but opt out when an event centers on someone you don't know/don't like with a simple excuse. "I'm sorry, but I already have plans for lunch that day, so I won't be able to join in the potluck this time, but I'll send a card." For this option, a good investment is a cheap box of all-occasion cards. They usually run about $3.00 of a box of ten.
2) Always decline. "I'm sorry, but I prefer to keep my personal and work life separate."
Either tactic is perfectly polite, but #1 is usually preferable if you work with a group of people you do actually like. If you choose #2, remember to stick with it even when your personal events roll around, and don't be upset when no one at the office remembers your birthday.
2007-05-09 10:29:39 · answer #3 · answered by Clint 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not something that you must do, but if you do it for one co-worker you should do it for everyone else. I would pitch in for a gift for the boss if it was a special occasion, but for co-workers birthdays, showers, etc. I did not. Since my policy included all co-workers, no one was offended. I also did not want anything for my own special occasions.
2007-05-09 20:24:09 · answer #4 · answered by noonecanne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats why we keep enough distance between co-workers!
but anyway,forexample if this is someone's birthday go and celebrate individualy.Actually it depends how close you people are. i dont think there will be any problem. i didnt have.
2007-05-09 10:27:09 · answer #5 · answered by ferhat 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No need to buy gift if you don't attend the party.
2007-05-09 20:52:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pressuring people to do this sort of thing is unprofessional. You shouldn't have to go along with it.
2007-05-09 09:52:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋