How can i manage work, social life and motherhood?

Question

I am a single mom to a 9 month baby boy. My ex husband and I share custody so i do have time free but i when i do have time free i still manage to do stuff for my son like clean his room, wash his bottle, buy his things i feel like i don't have time for me i hate to think that my life is over !

Answer 1

There isnt really an answer for that. You just do. It can be stressful or hard sometimes but you just have to... well... live. Make sure to take a time out from life from time to time and do something for yourself but just live in the moment and manage each incident as it arises.

Answer 2

No, I don't. Why should a mother lose custody if her child is disabled? It is not necessarily the mother's fault. I don't agree with women smoking, drinking and otherwise putting the baby at risk, but that doesn't mean they lack the potential to be fantastic mothers. Of course it's ideal for a woman to stop these things when she is with child, and I don't really understand how some don't, but that doesn't dictate the sort of mother they'd make. A miscarriage can be caused by a number of things, and it's not always to do with something the mother has actually done (ie smoking, drinking). It's an incredibly distressing event and I think it would be disgusting to put the poor woman up for manslaughter, especially seeing as though it may have been completely unpreventable. I respect the opinions of people who are pro-choice, and I would appreciate it if my opinions could be shown the same respect. I don't really think I am a true pro-life. All I know is that abortion is not for me, but I respect and do not judge women who have them. Desiree - That was just plain rude and completely uncalled for.

Answer 3

It's not easy, not to mention keeping up your marriage, and family responsibilities!

It's important to have a good partner in life who can back you up. Sometimes we have to let our social life go a bit. Emails are a good way to stay in contact, and also make phone calls while the baby is napping (later on, not at first, when you need to nap while they nap.)

Being a mom will be your number one priority. You have to put everything else aside, even work sometimes. When your baby is sick, sometimes you will have to sit there and hold them 20 hours a day (especially if they are nursing) and you literally will not be able to do anything. But, just remember, even when you're doing "nothing", you are doing your job. It's hard. It's not easy, especially if you're like me and you can't stand looking at a messy house as you sit there.

But, after the kids grow up a bit, it gets easier. You can leave baby with Dad, or with Grandma, and do stuff with your husband or go out with friends.

Try to be open and honest with your work and be flexible. Reassure them that even while you are pregnant or on maternity leave, or after the baby comes, you will be responsible. Offer to train someone to do your work while you are gone, or offer to come in once in a while after the baby is born and check on things if necessary, or be available over the phone for questions.

Good luck! You can do it! The adrenaline kicks in and you just get stronger somehow!

Answer 4

Sorry to tell you but once you have a mother you really don't get to have a social life to well. Unless it's with other mothers while the kids are playing together.

The work thing though you go to work have someone watch the kid while you work and then you come home and spend time with your daughter/son.

Answer 5

Ummm well work is easy you get maternity leave for a year, hopefully, and well a social life is pretty much over in less you have someone who will take over baby duties for a few hours or even just and hour a week.

Answer 6

as best as you can....first prioritize, what is most important? Let the little things slide and don't fret over them. I believe the order of importance should go motherhood, work, social life, just be sure and treat yourself once in a while so that you have some balance....good luck

Answer 7

I have not came up with the answer to that one yet. I do know that you need a good support system may it be your family, significant other, or your friends to help you on your quest to having some form of a life outside of your children. Just because we are mothers does not mean that we can't have it all!

Answer 8

SOCIAL LIFE- is not as important after you have a child (if you really want to be a mother) so if you wanted a child reall bad youll forget about social life you'll want to be with your baby all day as much as you can.
WORK-you'll want to work twicw as hard when you have a baby just to get her what she needs and wants so you'll want to work for the money to support her. now we have to work b/c we have responsibilities
MOTHERHOOD- enjoy it, have fun being a mother, dedicate you life at least for 18 years of their life in having fun and making them feel love. they grow so fast and if you dont give them time in the begging of their life they wont want it after they are 18 b/c they are older and have their friends to kick it with
we all adapt to new life so you have to adapt just like the rest of us

Answer 9

it is really hard. i'm always about to loose my mind working full time, and i have my husband there to help me. It makes it a lot easier when you have friends with kids. When your ex has your baby you dont have to be out at the bar, you can still have fun getting together with girlfriends and going to movies and lunch.

Answer 10

Find a good babysitter so you can go out sometimes or go out when the baby is with the dad, you can clean bottles later. But welcome to parenthood, you don't always get to do what you want anymore. And personally when I have time off, I would rather be with my kids cause one day they aren't going to want to be with you, it will be there friends they are going to want to be around.