My x-husband and I recently decided to try to get back together after being apart for 7 years. He suffers from bi-polar. After many long conversations he assured me that he was fine with the decsion to try to work things out and put our family back together again. I am to move to where he lives next week. He called me Monday and said he was spiraling and does not want to get back together. He is going to get help and I hope back on meds. I do love him, but am I being punished or tested for not staying with him the first time we married through sickness?
2007-05-09 03:14:08 · 38 answers · asked by ads_ags 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
people with mental health issues are often worried about the negative impact they have on others. They generally have low self esteem due to other peoples opinions of them. Having said that, he would not (likely) be thinking about the past right now. He is in a place of acknowledgement of the situation, he is aware of His own mental health and doing something to restore it back to his optimum. I say you just ride it out and decide whether you are in it for the long haul or not. This is going to happen again and again by the sounds of it. His mental health issues are not going to vanish. It is more about whether you love him enough, are able to support him through these times, and whether you want this in your life.
It is a sickness he has got. Dont judge him. Understand him and respect that he has been honest with you. Support him in whatever way you can.
He is probably saying he doesn't want to get back together because he sees all the issues associated with having a mental illness. Understand this in your responses to him.
2007-05-09 03:23:04 · answer #1 · answered by jannah b 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Neither, the illness he has is the problem. You have to think of the kids first and your health a bi-polar person is just not stable. It is not a good place for children to be.
God is much more understanding than people.
If you love him and have the strength then just keep in some kind of contact with him. Let him know that you do want the kids to grow up knowing him but you also want it to be a positive thing so when he isn't doing well it just is not going to happen.
If you don't have the strength just let go. Its not a cop out you know what you can take and what you can't. Listen to your gut.
2007-05-09 03:43:43 · answer #2 · answered by Lil'witch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bi-polar's need to be on meds EVERY DAY! The thing about it is, they think they're fine, so they stop taking the medications, and they'll only be fine for a couple of days, at most. By the time they need their meds and take them, it takes too long for them to "kick-in" and work.
God may hate divorce, but the real sin is if you re-marry someone else. God wouldn't "punish" you for divorce - and there's nothing wrong with re-marrying your previous spouse.
I don't think you're being tested or punished - if you are it's more likely from Satan than God - "all good things come from God."
2007-05-09 03:25:17 · answer #3 · answered by CHRISTINA 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You poor thing. Very good friends of the family,the husband(my hubby's best friend)is bi-polar. God bless her(his wife) soul with what she goes through.
Don't look at it as being judged by God. I don't believe that he would punish or test you for this. Have faith that he will pull through this. It took a while for his meds to regulate him and he is a new person now. Good luck to you.
2007-05-09 03:24:16 · answer #4 · answered by mrs O 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no one is testing you
as i understand bi polar its radical but iopposing feeling fluctuations the highest highs followed by the lowest of lows
this gets weary i presume
when he was on the high he wanted you back
but then hit the oppisite and now has brought you low
putting family back together is a great idea , but the best for children is consistancy
he lacked it thus you see the fruit of it
much of it is learned behaviour [seeming to children as a double standard ,but a very unsettling one
for you to uproot the children [from the relitive stability [peers they have now could swing them into the same spiral as thier father
stability is what the kids need
certainty
your feeling of being punished only confirms you and the kids need above all to have stability
stay put
2007-05-09 03:26:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Punished and tested?
If that is true, does this mean that the torture he
is going through to manage his whiplash
depression is so that God can try your soul?
Seems pretty cruel to me.
How about "Bipolar disorder is a disease."
We don't know the causes of it, but there does
tend to be at least some genetic linkage.
There are good drugs for it, but currently
the side effects make people want to stop
taking them when they are manic. This makes
for a bumpy life style.
Its not a test. This is life.
2007-05-09 03:22:57 · answer #6 · answered by Elana 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tested I would say, because Satan likes to destroy the family most of all. I did the same thing too, and failed miserably at my test. Not because of sickness but it doesn't matter the reason for leaving.... it's the destroying of it period. If I had it to do over again I would try to stay and pray every single day through my heartaches. You'll be rewarded for that.
Of course if you are already divorced and going back it could be that the damage is done now and you just need to move on but also help when you can.... it seems that he's not ready for the big committment and you cannot change his mind etc...
2007-05-09 03:21:37 · answer #7 · answered by sassinya 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Trust me--get out of the relationship NOW!!! I struggled with my EX being bi-polar for 2 1/2 years because we had a daughter together.....long story short...never in a million years would I have EVER thought...he tried to kill me!!! They ALWAYS say they are going to change and start taking thier meds....it only gets worse!! Jack@ss only spent 3 months in jail!
2007-05-09 03:25:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
With Bi-polars 90% of the time it's just more of the same. Bi polars won't stay on there meds. I was married to one, best thing I ever did was cut her out of my life, so I could have a life.
2007-05-09 03:23:53 · answer #9 · answered by frosty62 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people are born sensitive to environment. when we talk about the spirit world there is a battle going on. although it's not easy to explain it does have a great affect on how we experience life. Bipolar is something I recognize as someone being affected. it's not a test it's just what we are all going through today the ultimate battle between good and evil. there are two ways that a human is affected through emotions and through spiritual energy.... positive works to help balance us out but for that you need to expel the negative.. I wrote on my blog (360) how to deal with this emotional and energy check it out it works without medication. good luck.
2007-05-09 03:25:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋