I'm 21 years old and my girlfriend of 5 years cheated on me and got pregnant by the other guy. I have still choosen too stay with her and forgive her. I'm just confused I wonder if I should tell her to get in abortion? She has told me its all up to me but each day that goes by she gets more closer to the baby, me i get more upset. The other guy wants to be in my girlfriend's life so he wants her to have the baby. I really dont belive in abortions but i also dont want to raise another man's child or have him in my girlfriend's life . How can we move on with our lives if he still comes around to see his child.
2007-05-08 17:35:47 · 19 answers · asked by xxlkeyes 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
thats good you want to work things out but thats realy up to her. thats her child in her and that can be very emotional and you could really be asking for if she does go along with it
cause a pissy fit she will be. so talk it out with her first and make sure you both understand what is going to be done and how it should be done and be considerate of how she gonna feel and not just for your feeling that s a child her child really think about it. im sure things will work out for the better but more than likely if things work out you wil probably be more a father than he is and somehow enjoy the kid so just talk it out
bueno suerte mijo (good luck)
2007-05-08 17:43:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Abortion is not the right answer to this, This may be another mans child but at the same time this is your girlfriends child also. If you love her i am sure you will do the right thing and just let her have her baby.
Me personally i dont think killing an unborn child is fair cause its not his/her fault that one of there parents made a stupid mistake.
As far as moving on with your lives with each other its going to be at hard at first you are just going to have to accept the fact that he needs to see his child he isnt comming to see her he is only comming to see his child and thats all. I hope the best for you. Good Luck
2007-05-08 17:46:30 · answer #2 · answered by mommyandbaby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, Keyes. What a painful situation, ouch.
It's pretty strange for your gf to tell you it's up to you, about the abortion. Because, as I'm sure you know, it's not. It's absolutely up to her. You might have to tell her that she needs to take responsibility for the decision herself.
It sounds, anyway, as if she wants to have this baby. But maybe she's afraid that if she does, she'll lose you.
So your gf is about to have a baby who was fathered by someone else. This is reality. And almost certainly the baby's other father will be around, taking part in the baby's life.
You need to figure out for yourself whether you can accept raising this baby, and whether you can accept having the other guy around. If yes to both questions, fine. If no to either question, you need to get out of the relationship.
The one thing you really don't want to do is stay in the relationship and resent the baby, or resent the fact that the baby's other father is part of your gf's life. That would be a bad situation for everybody.
Good luck in figuring out what you want to do.
2007-05-08 17:50:29 · answer #3 · answered by OlderAndWiser 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's very noble of you to take her back, but don't you think your girlfriend was sending you a message when she had sex with someone else ? Unless it was a short lived thing, I think, in her heart, she wants you gone. Unless you can completely, completely forgive her and move on, there will always be this between you. If you thought you could completely forgive her, forever, then whoever the father of the child was would not be an issue. As for the baby, abortion on demand was never meant to be for convenience.
2007-05-08 17:54:44 · answer #4 · answered by =42 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not really your decision. It's her decision, and somewhat the other guy's decision. Relationships are about forgiveness, but if she cheated on you once, what's stopping her from cheating on you again?
Step back from the relationship until your girlfriend figures out what she's doing. If she decides to keep the baby, don't start up a relationship with her again. If she decides to abort, think carefully if she's really worth staying with, since she may cheat again.
2007-05-08 17:43:09 · answer #5 · answered by Jason 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
leave her!
she cheated on you and got pregnant.. what more reason do you want? If youve been together for 5 years and she does something like that, then she is not trustworthy.. and a relationship based on a damaged trust will not last. Whats the point of continuing? If she did it now, she will do it again!
Its a good thing that you got the warning before you marry her. Consider the baby as a warning of what kind of a woman she is.
2007-05-08 17:40:37 · answer #6 · answered by rhkenji 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said she cheated on you, which means you and her were still together. How do you know the baby is his, Maybe this baby is yours. If she cheated on you and it was only once or twice, it is more likely your baby. If I were you I would let her have the baby. Have the DNA test after wards. if you are the dad you will feel great that you did not kill you child,. If it is the other guys, you will feel great cause you did not kill a child. If you love her you can live with a human mistake. If you cant trust her then leave her.
Tracylyn S
2007-05-08 17:42:00 · answer #7 · answered by Tracylyn S 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
How can you be sure it's not your baby? Were you apart for a period of time?
I seriously do no think your relationship will survive this so if you do not believe in abortion and you know for sure this is not your baby then you should move on.
If she has an abortion because you asked her to she will eventually hate you for it.
If she keeps the baby you will eventually hate her for it.
It's a lose lose situation.
2007-05-08 17:40:21 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
love her enough to walk away. You aren't going to be what is best for her or her baby. You don't want the baby and you don't want to have to deal with the father of the baby. You can't trust her. Don't just cling to her because you need somebody for you. Let her go and wish her well. If she runs to the other guy maybe he will take care of her and raise his baby. The kid might have parents that let him live and want him then. I think it is time to walk away.
2007-05-08 17:48:45 · answer #9 · answered by julliana 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow tough question. first of all, you shold not be the one to decide. your girlfriend should decide. hopefully she decides to keep it and if you really love her then raising another man's child shouldn't be that bad. if you don't love her enough to do that then you should not be with her. you'll have to deal with the other guy but maybe set dates for him to be with just the kid or with everyone (never just your girlfriend and him by the way). just remember that she wants to be with you not him so just keep that in mind and don't stress. everything will work out, you seem like a great guy.
2007-05-08 17:42:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋