my fiancee's mom doesn't have a daughter and i really want herinvolved in the wedding. but i'm not sure what duties i can give her to handle. any suggestions?
2007-05-08 14:37:48 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I had the same situation with my daughter-in-law and lucky for me she was as thoughtful as you are. She asked me to go with her to look at various venues to hold the wedding, she asked me to for suggestions with the menu, she took me with her and her mother when she tried on her wedding gown for alterations. She planned a day for her mother and I to go and choose our gowns together. Even if you already have made a decision about something, it wouldn't hurt to ask her opinion. Perhaps she never used or intended to use any of the input I gave. It didn't really matter to me because she made me feel my opinion was important and that I was contributing something to the event. On the day of the wedding you might make her responsible for the gifts or ask her to make sure the place cards are correct. Some of the things a maid of honor normally does can be allocated to her. It made me happy and now that I think about it, I think I did make a contribution. Also, your mother can give you some suggestions for including her. That way, if some of the ideas are hers, your own Mom won't get her nose out of joint and you will have a wonderful day with everyone benefiting being involved.
2007-05-08 14:49:31 · answer #1 · answered by Violet c 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
We just attended a wedding, and at the brunch the day after the wedding, my fiance said to the groom, "Wow, I'm surprised you guys are up so early" (the wedding ended at 2am), and the groom responded, "It's the last thing I have to attend." How sad! I know you don't want your fiance to check in and play the part of the groom, so the first thing you should do is sit down with him and ask him what he imagines his wedding to be like. Then incorporate his ideas with yours. I think most men don't get excited because they don't realize that it's their party, too. Make him feel that the wedding won't be any good with his input. Also, explain to him why you are staring so early. Maybe he doesn't understand that your guests need time to plan. Everyone wants a nice wedding and I'm sure he has ideas that will get him more involved in the planning. My fiance is excited about the wedding and has been involved in all the planning because it's not just my ideas and vision. Planning a wedding is a great time to work together as a couple and create an event that represents both of your personalities.
2016-05-18 21:36:23 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How about addressing the inventation with you, make the bird seed bags, let her pick up some things that you need that you can tell her what to pick up. Go with your mother and you to pick out your wedding dress and the brides dresses. Go with you to look at wedding things. Pick out your shoes, and jewelery. There are alot of things that you can ask her to do so that she will feel very important and your hubby to be will think alot more of you for including his mom. You can ask her about her wedding if there is something that she would have done different. Just make you a list of what everybody is going to do and it will help you and things want get out of controll.
2007-05-08 15:24:39 · answer #3 · answered by Ready G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have her go with you and your mom to your gown fittings. Go with her to find a Mother of the Groom's dress, ask her for advice for the flowers and tuxes (after all she will want to make sure her son is looking great). You can go over menu items with her and maybe ask her to help address the invitations since she knows half the guest list. Best of luck planning your wedding and congratulations! I think it's very sweet of you to want to include her- I'm sure you will have a wonderful relationship with your mother in law.
2007-05-08 14:46:20 · answer #4 · answered by terasa425 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would just take her around to different events that are concerned with the wedding. When you put down the deposit for the reception, bring her along to see the place. Walk around with her and have her give opinions of decorations/centerpieces, etc. When you dress shopping, bring her along w/ your own mother. Ask her to keep track of the RSVP or help w/ the seating chart for your fiance's side of the family. If your DIY anything, like centerpieces, programs, favors, etc; then enlist her to help with those.
2007-05-08 14:58:22 · answer #5 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the sons mother and father, if still married,usually invite the family of the bride to dinner after the engagement is announced.The grooms family also makes arrangements for the rehearshal dinner,the night before the wedding.She(the grooms mother) plans where to have the dinner and sends out appropriate invitations.She can help address envelopes for invitiations.She is also to be invited to all showers,but is not expected to give one,it would be bad taste.The mother of the bride does most of the planning,as it is her daughter and hers special time,but the grooms mother helps greet and intoduce her family side quests to his family at the weddingAny helpful thiongs thatshe can do I'm sure she'll be more than glad to do
2007-05-08 16:02:43 · answer #6 · answered by laurie f 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you're delegating the tasks, you could give her things like deciding on centerpeices for the tables or finding a good deal on catering. Ask her opinion, she has more life experience and I'm sure she'd be glad to offer suggestions.
2007-05-08 14:52:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anniekd 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i am also getting married and how i got my mother-in law involved is i took her to dinner and i brought a wedding books, mageszines and we talked about colors, where it's going to be held. the next week we went to a bridal shop and we tryed on dresses for her and me.i hope this helps you and good luck with your wedding!!
2007-05-08 14:51:17 · answer #8 · answered by Tina 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My fiance's mom doesn't have a daughter either and she decided to help me without even asking. She went ahead and purchased invitations without asking me if she could, and she bought ones that were absolutly nothing like what i had wanted (even after i told her numerous times what my invitations, which I was going to purchase myself, were going to look like).
So personally, as a result of my situation, i am not a fan of allowing in-laws to help. Sorry.
2007-05-08 17:47:59 · answer #9 · answered by katskradle 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She is in charge of the rehearsal dinner. It is not your fault she doesnt have a daughter and you need to respect your mothers duties if you want a traditional wedding. If not then talk with your mother and see what she DOESNT want to do and give that to your fiancees mom
2007-05-08 14:42:27 · answer #10 · answered by barthebear 7 · 0⤊ 4⤋