I am a 40 year old female, and my younger brother (30) has suddenly accused me of sexually abusing him when we were both children. He claims he had a "flashback" of some repressed memory and is going to try to take me to court. I can't even describe what I'm feeling right now because there are no words. My whole family is shocked- this came completely out of the blue. I am innocent and have absolutely no clue what to do- I have no prior history of sexual abuse with anyone, no arrest record, nothing. I don't know what's going on with him or why he would do this to me. I don't even really know what to ask here specifically, except can you actually be brought up on charges for a "repressed memory" or "flashback"? I was about 11 years old according to him, so that would make the abusive incident almost 30 years ago. I'm afraid my reputation and life will literally be ruined if he does this, and don't know how to defend myself. Please any advice would be helpful.
2007-05-08 12:24:49 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics & Government ➔ Law Enforcement & Police
thanks for all the replies. He says he was two years old when this supposedly happened, and I was 11/12. But I guess if a one year old can't remember anything, a two year old probably can't either. :(
2007-05-08 13:00:07 · update #1
That would make him about 1 yr old and to even conceive that he has a memory from that young is ridiculous.
And frankly the police would never lay charges based on that lack of evidence.
The real question is why is your brother doing this to you?
I believe there are two possibilities:
1. Your brother was at sometime abused when he was a young child by someone else. I have heard cases where the victim blamed another member of the family or another person because they felt safer blaming that person than the actual abuser. I know this sounds strange but there are some deep physiological reasons for this.
2. Your brother is suffering from some deep emotional or physiological disturbance. He is acting out this fabricated abuse scenario because of it. He is just in the right age group for Schizophrenia. Or he could have some deep emotional wound because of the large age gap between the two of you specially if there are no siblings in between.
I can understand how you must feel being accused by him like this but I really think your brother is seriously ill emotionally or physiologically or both and needs help.
Discuss this with the your parents you all need to work together to get him help.
I can't see how the police would be able to take his claims seriously in anyway because he is saying he was only 1 when the abuse occurred.
2007-05-08 12:45:22 · answer #1 · answered by Fluffy Wisdom 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Adult Sibling Abuse
2016-11-10 19:37:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then he was about 1 when it happened? And even if you did and don't remember it... I'd think kids playing "doctor" up until about 10 or 11 is within the norm. Not only that if you were 11, then you were a kid too, I don't think he can seriously bring up charges. You may want to check with the statute of limitations in your area though. However, I don't think there's any real risk here to your reputation if he is claiming to have a memory from when he was 1 year old. You shouldn't have trouble finding a lawyer who can completely blow this one out of the water.
2007-05-08 12:33:50 · answer #3 · answered by A.J. L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From a legal stand point, he doesn't have a case. If you were an adult when this happened, if it happened, that would be a different story. But, since he claims that these things happened when you were 11, that would make him 1 years old. Hardly sexually abuse. Maybe you were changing his diaper and touched his "wee-wee"..., but in any case, a child of that age (1yr) wouldn't have any recollection of anything, let alone being abused. Wouldn't have been talking yet, or forming words bigger than Dada, or mama.
What I would do, to put a big stop to the hole thing, is to file a lawsuit against him for slander, and don't wait. When he sees what the outcome is going to be against him, he'll drop the sexual abuse thing real fast. If you don't know how to proceed, contact an attorney in your area, who can give you better guidance.
2007-05-08 12:33:17 · answer #4 · answered by auditor4u2007 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i saw some sort of oprah-like or dr. phil-esque show on this exact thing years ago -- can't remember what show. it was about people like your brother who go to counseling and these COUNSELERS somehow bring up these so called "repressed" memories and the people like your brother actually start BELIEVING in it and that it actually happened. it's really bizarre. if he were 1 yr. old when it happened then i doubt he could recall it. is he in counseling right now for anything that you know of? he could have been abused, but in his mind somehow he is thinking it was you instead of another person. best of luck with all this. contact a lawyer and an expert in repressed flashbacks, etc.
2007-05-08 12:35:16 · answer #5 · answered by curious_One 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is physically impossible for him to have a memory of anything when he was 1 yr old. The human brain is not developed enough at that age. memory developement for long term usually starts around 2 1/2-3 yrs old. If his only evidence that this occured is a memory from when he was 1 yr old, the courts wont even consider making charges against you. It would be impossible for them to prosecute this case.
Put your mind at ease, consult with an attorney.
2007-05-09 04:45:39 · answer #6 · answered by weapon_30 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So he has memories of when he was 1 and you were 11? Hmm, I don't care how repressed or unrepressed he is now, NOBODY can remember anything before age 3.
2007-05-08 12:35:48 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is "repressing" the memory that you changed his diaper? How on earth can a 1 year old remember anything? He needs help... big time. Or is someone already helping him? Maybe putting this "repressed memory" into his consciousness.
2007-05-08 12:40:32 · answer #8 · answered by Bookworm4124 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you were 11 that would mean that he was only 1 and I do not believe that anyone can remember anything that happened when they were that young. Also because you were a minor at the time even if you did do it you couldn't be punished in any way.
2007-05-08 12:29:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does he have a history of being manipulative? I have a step sister who is very manipulative, and she had one of those memories, and blamed her brother for the same thing. After she was advised that the statute of limitations had run out on the alleged occurrence, she confessed that she was angry because he wouldn't give her drug money and wanted revenge. I would get an attorney, and he can advise you on the statute of limitations in your state for child molest. Also, if your brother can't get the criminal charges brought against you, he may try to sue you civilly. It is a horrible thing to be accused of. Best of luck to you.
2016-05-18 05:07:58 · answer #10 · answered by richard 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋