and it has entries about past sexual experiences. I can't stand that it's hanging around the house anymore. I know I'm being selfish, petty, etc., but I really can't stand the fact that it's here. There's nothing I can do about it, is there?
2007-05-08 09:19:04 · 15 answers · asked by guyitsover14 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
start your own diary..
2007-05-08 09:28:26 · answer #1 · answered by swthrt474 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Which is worse:
a.) Feeling free to express yourself in your diary, writing about past experiences and what you think of them.
b.) Invading your spouse's privacy?
I think that reading someone else's personal diary is despicable. As a spouse you are entitled to certain rights, but invasion of privacy is not one of them. Are you comfortable with the idea of your spouse rifling through everything you own?
Marrying someone doesn't mean you get to own and control everything your spouse is and does. If that's your idea of marriage then you're in for a bumpy ride.
You are being petty and selfish. You should be ashamed of yourself. Keep this episode in mind when you inform your children about respecting the rights of others.
2007-05-08 09:30:30 · answer #2 · answered by Peter D 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I can absolutly understand how you feel. My boyfriend has pictures of his old girls, but they are mixed in with others. As do I. You can't expect him to toss the diary, it has a lot more than past sexual experiences in it I'm sure. (Unless it's just a black book)! I have a box with items old boyrfiends have given me, it' tucked away, but it's a nice reminder of the loves I use to have. Doesn't mean I want to be with them. Remember that is his past and you are his future. If you catch him reading old times, then say something - like I am here now, why do you have live in the past.
2007-05-08 09:27:01 · answer #3 · answered by Hope I Can Help :-) 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Honestly .. i know exactly how you feel! I recently came across some old files in his computer when i was trying to clean it of virus's for him. There were poems and pictures of ex-girlfriends etc, and i was a little hurt that we had been dating so long ( and are living together too) and he STILL had them...
I just brought it up as though it was not too big of a deal one night to him and told him that I was a little upset that he still had all those memories. I told him that it wasn't like i wanted to pretend that they didn't happen, I just would prefer if he got rid of the poems/pics and so on...
That night he deleted all the old stuff. His response was that he just didn't remember he had that stuff on there and never had a chance to delete it. Could be sorta the same thing with your fiance...
2007-05-08 09:25:27 · answer #4 · answered by flygurl_037 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
You should break up with him and marry a virgin, because otherwise any person you get engaged to is going to have a past. Even if you burn the diary, the memories are still there...
2007-05-08 09:27:56 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
well, you can always burn it when he is at work, that is what most women do, or seeing that you are going to marry this guy, you could ask him to put it away somewhere in the attic or storage, etc. tell him how it makes you feel and see if he is willing to part with it, i know i would be ok parting with a book for my fiance if she asked.. videos would be a different story though..
2007-05-08 09:23:33 · answer #6 · answered by mayday3374 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Everyone has a past, hon. Give her the right to have her past. Just put it out of your mind and go on loving her for what she is NOW: your finance~who loves YOU!
2007-05-08 09:23:42 · answer #7 · answered by Sunshine 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well that kinda depends on if he knows you've read it or know about it.
If he knows you know, then tell him to get rid of it, and tell him its bothering you.
I wouldnt be able to stand it!
Grr...
Don't worry, youre not being selfish at all.
If you kept one, I'm pretty sure he'd feel the same way..
2007-05-08 09:28:52 · answer #8 · answered by (kelsie) <33 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
wow. uhm well its a diary hun. tht usually wht u write in it. my mum has all of hers from when she was young. i dont think it should bother u tht much. cuz ur the one shes engaged to not the other ppl in it.
2007-05-08 09:45:40 · answer #9 · answered by xXxcaptainxplanetxXx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Should you be reading the diary, if you are willing to own up to it, admit it, and be honest about how it is upsetting you.
2007-05-08 09:25:30 · answer #10 · answered by judles 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he's your fiance, it's time for him to leave those other experiences in the past. He needs to give it up.
2007-05-08 09:28:26 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋