Should I confront her?

Question

I have a daycare at home and usually don't have any problems with the parents. But today I came across a big problem. I require the parents to bring a sippy cup or leave one at my home for their child. One mother leaves her daughter's sippy cup with me, but occasionally takes it with her for her ride home. Which is fine as long as she brings another one the next day. Last night her daughter took her sippy cup home, and this morning came here with another one. It already had milk in it so I felt no need to empty it. But breakfast time came and I opened her sippy cup to find old milk clumped up on the inside of the lid. It wasn't just in the crevaces. It was in plain sight. Just hanging there. I rinsed it off and took off the no spill stopper to find more chunky milk inside the sippy cup spout. Of course I washed it really good and got it all out. But I was mortified with the idea that her daughter had been drinking out of it. Should I confront her mother with this? If so, how?

Ok I am getting a lot of the same answers, and they are great if this hadn't happened before. But unfortunately it has. Not the milk issue but a mold issue. I opened a cup that she brought for her daughter and there was mold growing on the inside of the lid (in the same place). This girl is 2 and I am sure by now she knows how to clean a sippy cup properly. I am not questioning her parenting skills at all because I know she is a good mom. I am just concerned why she isn't thorough with this stuff. She seems like a pretty well put together person and her daughter seems to be well groomed, with the exception of some unclipped finger and toe nails. I am a mother myself and know that I am not perfect. But I don't see why this has to happen more than once, even twice.

Answer 1

Oh my goodness, I have a day care in my home and had the same thing happen repeatedly with one of the parents I work with. Thankfully I have a stock of sippy cups and would put the nasty cup back in the child's cubby and give them a clean one to use for the day. When the mom got there I told her about the cup and that I had given the child a clean cup to use and that she needed to soak the other one and wash it thoroughly. This happened several more times before I finally told her that I needed to check the cup before she left her child at my house. After one week of checking to see if the cup was clean or not, in her presence, it embarrassed her enough to never do it again, but it happened 4 or 5 times before she made sure the cup she sent was clean. There is no excuse for stuff like that, you need to tell the mom as gently as possible and hope that she is embarrassed enough to make sure it doesn't happen again. It's so gross not to mention unbelievably unhealthy for the child. Good luck.

Answer 2

My kids are really bad at stashing cups. I have found cups under the couch, in cupboards we never use, under the bathroom sink, under the car seats. I finally got in the habit of counting all the cups and I only ever take out two cups, one for each kid. I will not fill another cup until we find the original two (unless we are headed out the door etc. But then I know to find the missing cup when we get home.). Even with my strict cup regiment, my kids have appeared with a different cup then I handed them. Usually the new mystery cup is nasty. If her daughter retrieved a cup from a stash and mom didn't notice on the way out the door, or had poured milk into a cup that had had an acidic liquid (lemonade or soda) before it without cleaning it really well then it would have curdled the milk within a few minutes. I would mention it gently assuming that it is one of those freak things that sometimes happens with kids. Now, where did my son get that Twizzlers from?

Answer 3

I think you should give her the benefit of the doubt. I don't think she would have purposely done this to her daughter. Sometimes parents need to realize that after about an hour they need to make sure the milk is still good and fresh. The daughter could have gotten that cup from under the sofa and if mother is busy and running out the door, she didn't notice and so the milk is curdled. If this happens again, then I would definitely bring it up. I would tell her mother that this was the second time her milk was spoiled in the cup and that could cause her daughter to get sick. So she needs to make sure cups are clean and milk is fresh. That's all.

Answer 4

Yuck thats just disgusting. well yes i would definatly mention it. mabey she has 2 cups exactly the same and she filled one with good milk, then her daughter fffound one that she previously hid (my kids have hidden their sippy cups before and when I find them Yuck) mabey she was half asleep when she was packing her daughter up to go. mabey she asked her husband to get a cup but he diddnt hear her and she thought he did and grabed the old cup off of the counter. might have just been lack of communication. stuff like that can easily happen. but yes you need to let her know. if shes aware then she can be more careful and make better sure that all her daughters sippys are accounted for and clean.
I would just say something like, you may want to keep an eye out for Sarah tonight. this morning when i opened her cup the milk was all curdled. Iive been watching her for signs of tummy ache. Yes Its disgusting and could be very serious mistake but it still could have been a mistake. After all, what parent would knowingly give their child spoiled milk?

Answer 5

Is this from a first time mom? Maybe she doesn't know how to take it apart properly...perhaps when she picks up her child you can 'accidentally' let her see you put it back together before you offer to fill it with water/juice whatever for the ride home... and say how you have seen some really nasty things in some other peoples cups in the past- it might promp her to look more closely at the things she is giving to her child :)

EDIT: After looking at your additional information, maybe this woman is relying too much on a dishwasher.
Since it has happened before, don't be blunt. I like that experience someone else wrote of about checking cups...perhaps you should try that one :)

Answer 6

maybe she was in a hurry and picked up a lid she thought was clean but wasn't. or, maybe that lid got put away with the clean dishes on accident and she didn't look at it when she used it this morning.

my guess is that it was probably an accident. if this was the first time anything like this has ever happened, i would just ignore it.

if it's not the first time, or if it happens again, just nonchalantly say something like: "your daughter's cup lid had some old milk stuck to the inside of it this morning but i took care of it. you might want to check the other ones just in case your dish washer isn't working right or something"

try to be as non confrontational as possible, so she doesn't feel like you're blaming her for it.

Answer 7

Let her know but nicely. I'm embarrassed to say I have been there. When my little ones were actually little (I am currently getting hand me downs from my eldest) they would start drinking from a sippy cup and then lose it. Most times it was lost so good that it usually wouldn't turn up for a few days and when it did I usually bought a new one, at least when I was the one to find it. My middle one found one on me the one time (actually each of them have done this to me couple of times but I will stick to the one story) and took it with him when we went to the park. Frankly, I was running late and didn't even take a second look at it, I assumed it was the one I had given him earlier. Weeellllll, to my surprise, it wasn't. It was horrible. He hadn't actually drank from it but kept asking me for more so I was getting ready to humor him by just adding more to the drink when I opened for a not so wonderful surprise. Luckily I had nothing but understanding moms around who have been there and just offered up one of their spares while I threw ours out.
Point of the story is "spit happens" ( I love seeing that on baby onesies) and I am quite sure it wasn't something that was done intentionally or even negligently, just accidentally.

Edit:
I will reiterate:
Chances are she has sippy cups hidden around the house that her daughter finds later on with gunk and mold and what ever else you decide to add to this later. If you don't take the time to fill her in she is not going to realize her daughter is going to day care with this stuff. Open up that mouth of yours and tell her. Sheesh, moms are not perfect, we make mistakes just like everyone else and could occasionally use a hand in one thing or another. As for the unclipped, dirty toenails and fingernails, again it happens. My kids lived in the dirt and were constantly getting grunge in places I didn't think possible. Pig Pen comes to mind when I think of some kids. A little dirt under the nails is no biggy. Get over yourself and quit being so judgemental.
Lastly, if you think she is such a good mom you wouldn't be ragging on her on here. Maybe you are more concerned about your mothering techniques and taking it out on this poor woman.

Answer 8

I would definately say something but don't do it as a confrontation. Just as an FYI maybe. Like hey- I noticed .... when I went to re-fill the cup and just wanted to let you know. Maybe she forgot the sippy cup and had one laying in the car or something and didn't intend for her daughter to drink whatever was in it. I don't know--- I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt b/c if she really is that irresponsible it makes me mad. GOOD LUCK!

Answer 9

I wouldn't confront but kindly notify. She may have grabbed the wrong one on the way out. I know its gross and they shouldn't be leaving those yucky ones laying around but sometimes moms are very busy and things happen. I think you should tell her in case her daughter gets sick. Also, if she is a bad housekeeper with her daughters sippy cups then she may be embarrassed enough to do something about it.

Answer 10

She probably didn't wash it good enough or she didn't know that the stopper came out she probably just rinsed it real quick in the sink and wasn't thinking.I would probaably let it go this time and if it happened again I would ask her to make sure she took the stopper out to wash it because last time you found some clotted milk in there and tell her that you are sure that she doesn't want her to drink out of it like that, just say that you just happened to notice it when you washed it.