Help me stay happy!!!?

Question

I am having some difficulties at home right now, and I am finding it extremely difficult not to get brought down by everyone else's problems.

My dad was involved in an accident a few months ago, and still won't be able to walk for another few months yet. He continually moans and feels sorry for himself, and also complains about the pain, but will not take his painkillers (for what reason? I don't know).

My brother is also very low at the moment. He has recently split with his gf and I hate seeing him upset.

My house is therefore not a very happy place to be, and although I do sympathise with both of them, I am finding it very hard to stay happy & upbeat. I try to keep myself occupied with other things, but can't help but think "what is the point?" How can I stop myself being dragged into unhapiness?

Answer 1

If you are of age, move out. If not, you'll just have to grin and bear it.

Answer 2

It's just a bad time right now. Everybody goes thru bad times, it's part of life. You have to stay strong, because you didn't get into an accident, or break up with your boyfriend. You have it made, so all you can do is help them and try and lift their spirits. If you don't lift them now, you will in the future, because they both will never forget how you stood by their side at a bad time and they will love and respect you even more.

Just tell them that this is hurting you and you want to know what can I do to make it better. They'll probably say, nothing, but just say, well if I can help in anyway, I'm here.

Tell your brother that's only the beginning. I'm assuming he's young and that's what it's all about. To date many girls and break up. That's how you learn what love is. It's like training. This will all go away, they're life isn't ruined, Thank God and Good Luck.

Answer 3

Although it is difficult to stay happy when things are tough at home I find the best way is to surround myself with positive people.
Also try to talk with your Dad and tell him that a positive attitude will help him recover much faster.
Can you get him started on some kind of hobby?
Try not to take on others problems, it is so easy to do when you are a caring person but will drag you down.

Answer 4

Young lady, you seem too much bogged down by the burden of problems. What you should do is to ask your father to offer advice to your brother to be cheerful,as he is lonely and dejected. Your father, even if in too much pain should agree to it as not only he is the HOF, this is his duty also

Once he agrees and does that, he will realise it himself that he too is spreading negative energy in the hpuse and should improve himself.

If he does it, good for all of you otherwise, if finance is not a problem, organise a shooo... party and invite the friends of bro and pop including yours and announce that whoever makes them laugh the most shall be the guest of honour at a separate party when your father recovers.

When both of them see what efforts you are putting in, they will automatically try to stay cheerful (specially around you) and the more they stay that way, the more they will start feeling that way.

Best wishes for your mission.

Answer 5

Right. Here's my two cents. Don't be dragged into the pit of self-pity cos really, I've been there and its useless. You need to maybe find out why dad doesn't want to take his pills. Some people find taking pills makes them seem weak or sickly. But he needs em and maybe you could tell him something to make him swallow em. As for your brother, take him out. Don't let him sit and brood. He needs to do things and keep moving. It worked for me. He'll meet more people and slowly get better. This must be a hard time for you, but soldier on and it'll pass. It always passes.

Answer 6

You have a whole pile of problem.
-Dont worry about the past.
-Dont worry about the future.
What has happen has happen for the best, what will happen will happen for the best.
Leave in the present and that is the best way.
1)Hear your father, tell him his option and he shall decide you know his estemm is low and you and other members of the family need to rally around.
2)Your brother he will sulk, leave him alone it is not the end of the world, just get him to meet some other girl or introduce some of your friends so that he can rebound back.

You need to be cheerful so that you will be the beacon in diffcult times.....
Take care.

Answer 7

The problems in your house appear to be very temporary. However if you want happiness you must think happiness.The more you think of problems, the more you get dragged into problems. Change your thoughts.Go out with friends, do things you love doing enjoy life.Before you even know it your dad will be fine and your brother will get over it too.Good luck sweetheart.

Answer 8

That's what friends are partners are there for. You need to get away for the day or a few days or even a few hours. Get yourself out with a few girls and go shopping or cinema or anything but have a good old laugh and make your stomach hurt from all the laughter.

Answer 9

Hi,

Dun get too emotional involved, life is cyclical, up and down, just like stock market. No doubt you love your father and brother, but i believe they are grow up, so it kind of they have to take personnal responsibility themselves ok.

You should continue your life as usual and perhaps get a few buddies or friends to chill it out in some outing.

The world is big, there are many others more worst off then you, everyone of us have problems, but we take it easy and tell ourselves to cool it and be happy. It is not hypocrisy kind of stuff, you just have to smile.

Answer 10

1. Tell dad.. begrateful that you're alive..so what you cant walk... you can hug your daughter and iffin you had died in the accident you wouldnt be able to ( survived a car crash and was told i would never walk again nor dance and i had a full scholarship to study abroad... i can walk i just cant dance..and if i could dance and would have taken that scholarship then i wouldnt have my children)
2. Your brother will have upsets in his life..there are other fish in the sea
3. put a sign up..doctor NOT in .... and take a day to YOURSELF .... take care of you .. spa bath just relax ..so then you can recharge yourself inturn will be helping them.
4. brighten your space so you can go in there and just breathe w/ YOUR happy things

Answer 11

You can not go through life letting everyone elses problems become yours. Sure you are sad for them, but you have a life too. You deserve to be happy without feeling guilty. Go on and have a good time. When their problems are over, they will too. I am sure that your dad had his fun when he was younger. I am sure that your brother will recover from this relationship and find a new one. Let yourself be happy. You are a good person for caring so much, but your life is yours to be lived. Their life, although you can help, is their life to be lived.