how much longer is this going to hurt so bad?

Question

My grandpa passed away last June...he was more like a father to me tho, i saw him everyday growing up...he died very suddenly, and i just cant seem to make it through the grieving process...i still cry all the time, i miss him so terribly much...having been almost a yr, is this normal? i figured id be at least able to go a week or so without crying by this point...thanks everyone

Answer 1

Grief affects everyone in different ways. You were obviously very close to him and you will always have that special bond. It is true that time heals all wounds. One thing that may help is to always try to remember the happy times and what made him smile and be happy. You must have been a great joy to him. Also try to remember/know that he would only want the best for you and loved you very much. Just try to think of all the positives and eventually you'll be able to remember him and smile instead of cry.

Answer 2

It usually don't take this much time to start getting over the death of a loved one... Notice I said Usually? Everyone is different. You can't really put a time limit on how long someone mourns the death of a loved one. However, you should be able to go for more than a few days without crying by now. Have you talked to anyone in your family about this? Family plays a big part in the grieving process. You can't do it alone. If your family is of no help then maybe you should look for an agency in your area that specializes in this kind of thing... I know you don't want people all up in your business, but there are people just like you in these groups... At least give it a try.

Answer 3

My father passed away last March and I still cry at least once a week. I think about my dad everyday. You will never get over it, but you will eventually accept it. I still haven't accepted it, but you need to think how happy would be with you this upset. I couldn't get over the rut I was in when this happened to me, so I decided to make a geographical change and start fresh. It worked very well, I had a new job, new people, new life. It made me take my mind off my dad a little bit. It was the best decision I could have made. Not saying that you should pick up and move and run away to make your problems dissapear but that's what helped me. I hope I was somewhat useful. Also - sorry for your loss.

Answer 4

hello jessica, I know what you are going through. I feel your pain. I am going through the same thing. Except it was my great grandmother who passed away. In fact she passed away the day after my 21st birthday. Which was last january. She was more than a great grandmother to me. She was a mom to me. She was always there for me. And she and I had a special bond that she didnt have with her other grand children or great grandchildren. She holds a special place in my heart. The day she passed away was the most painful day of my life. It felt like someone ripped out my heart and cut it into pieces. And up until it had been a year I still grieved from time to time. It is so hard to imagine that she is gone. Life seems so weird with out her here. I still grieve from time to time, but I am getting better at it. I am staying strong for her as I know that she wouldnt want me to be here to mourn over her being gone all the time. She would want me to move on with my life and stay happy.

And I am sure your grandfather would want the same for you. I know that this is hard to get through. As losing someone very close to our hearts is never easy to get over. But it just takes time and courage and a lot of strength to get past this. As time goes on you will eventually stop grieveing. But only time can tell when.

I am truly sorry for your loss. I wish you the best. Just dont think about him all the time. Think about other things. Like keep yourself busy and such. Think about all the happy moments you had with your grandfather and how much you have gained from him being in your life. And remember that he is in a better much happier place and that he is watching over you. And remember that he will always be with you.

Answer 5

Very sorry for your loss. The grieving process takes time. If you could graph your emotional state, it would look more like a mountain range rather than a steady incline upward (happier). There will be days and moments where you are very sad, but then you will have brief moments of laughter and happiness. Eventually, you will have more days of happiness than sadness. Give yourself plenty of rest. Do not hold back your emotions. If you have someone you trust that you can share your thoughts with, do so.

Answer 6

Yes it is normal. Since he was like a parent to you. Losing someone is hard. But, just know that he wouldn't want you to continue grieving so terribly. He is in your heart and in so many memories. So he will never be really gone. Treasure those memories and remember him threw those memories. Not threw the death of him. Honor him with a smile when you think of those sweet memories ok? Only time can ease the pain. But if it gets to out of control, olease concider seeking out someone to talk to. Good Luck.

Answer 7

Unfortunately it is normal when you are really close to someone. My mom died 3 years ago and I still cry a lot. You need to start remembering the good things about him and your relationship and realize how lucky you were to have had him in your life. Only time can ease the pain as hard as it seems now. It is so sweet that you two were so close. Maybe you should talk to someone about it? God bless you.

Answer 8

Of course it's normal to grieve over someone who was very close to you for that long! What you have to keep in mind is that he's still with you, Even if you can't See, hear, feel or even know it, He is. I know it sounds weird, I'm just a very spiritual person and knowing this always helps me along when I'm feeling down about people who was close to me passed away. I hope it helps :)

Answer 9

Nobody can tell you an exact time to grive but . . . a year is a long time. Check into grief counseling where people meet with somebody they knew died and talk about it. You can go anti-depressants to see if it helps too but talk to the doctor. Are you happy with job, school, friends, family? Make sure everything else is ok and in order. Plus is this the first time you had somebody close to you die?

Answer 10

It sucks to lose some really close to us. Maybe you should consider some therapy for this! Maybe you could have some symptoms of depression over his death. It's not saying that you are crazy,or anything! But sometimes it takes a little more help than the time healing process. Good luck,and sorry for your loss.