I met a guy online and after a few emails and calls we decided to meet. I knew he was a few years older than me and very serious about getting into a LTR. We had a nice date going to a couple of places in town and just getting to know each other. At the end of the date he asked me to be his g/f. I am I wrong in thinking this is a little fast?
2007-05-07 07:34:49 · 50 answers · asked by jccollegegirl03 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thanks for all the responses. Here are some add'l details for you if you need them.
There is a 15 year age diff. He's in his 40s
We live 60 miles apart.
We met at the restaurant.
I did have friends on stand by with my cell in my pocket if the date went bad.
2007-05-07 08:04:12 · update #1
Something , especially a relationship going too fast is in the eye of the beholder so to speak. What may be too fast for one person, may seem just right to someone else. If you feel this is too fast for you then talk to him. If he is a good guy he will understand and give you time. If he isn't he will be insistent or leave. Here is a chance to test him. Take it. It is better to find out now instead later on down the road just what kind of person he really is. Good luck, and please be careful.
2007-05-07 07:41:40 · answer #1 · answered by Dark One.. tormentor of kitties 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You are not wrong in thinking that this is entirely too fast. You have only had a few emails and calls and have only met in person once.
I would be running in the other direction. This screams of desperation. How can you decide to be someones girlfriend based on one meeting. The emails and calls do not count for much as a lot can be indicated or inferred over the Internet; that may not be true in person.
Please, give yourself some time to get to know this guy better, before you make any decisions about becoming his girlfriend. I would be getting a complete background checkup done on this guy before I would consider a second date.
Do not let him know where you live, or any other more personal information; there is something wrong with this desperation.
Please be careful and keep your eyes open.
Good luck.
2007-05-07 07:45:00 · answer #2 · answered by Sue F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I think it is too soon. You still don't know enough about this person and truthfully, I think you moved to fast going out with him - and without others that 'you' know with you in case something happened. Additionally, I have learned throughout my life (54) that when you stop to 'ask' this question, you already had doubts about your actions. Your innerman will never lead you wrong - you need to listen to him and follow directions. The world we live in today is full of not-so-well-meaning people People can be dangerous and misleading. There are pros out there who have this 'date-thing' down pat. I knew a young lady who did what you did - talked a little on line and then finally met the person. He took her out for movie and drinks and she had been warned over and over not to ever put her drink down and leave it. She did. And he spiked her drink with some kind of 'red devil' pill. When she returned she continued to drink and she was found in a nasty, dirty, motel. No clothes, no purse, no keys - dead. Raped and beaten, cut AND shot. She was hardly recognizable. I would re-consider. He might be straight up - but if I were you , I'd take total avantage of the peoplesearch.com website and spend a little money and have this guy checked out. You can find out if he's married,, schools, beein incarcerated - a plethora of information that might save your life. I do not advise dating someone from online. It's too dangerous. In fact, research anyone that attempts to date you.
2007-05-07 07:47:26 · answer #3 · answered by THE SINGER 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thats my biggest problem with internet dating. Alot of people I have met are ready to jump into a relationship from the first sight!
I personally think its waaay to fast. What is the rush? Are you planning on going anywhere? Is he? If not, then take time- get to know one another and dont put all your eggs in one basket til you know that this is something your in for the long haul!
Good luck!
2007-05-07 07:56:23 · answer #4 · answered by stayc 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It does seem a little bit fast. How far away are you guys? If the distance is signifcant, that could be part of why he sped it up. Regardless, if you aren't comfy with it, ask him to slow down. If he's a good guy, he will do so. If he doesn't, then he might not be the kind of guy you should spend your time on when there are other ones you could be meeting who would be better suited for you.
2007-05-07 07:43:04 · answer #5 · answered by joy_like_a_fountain 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it's love at first sight, then no, it isn't too early to become his girl friend, if you like him but don't feel a connection like his your soul mate, then take it slow... tell him, you would like to take it slowly. If he has good intentions he'll wait for you, no matter how long it takes. It's always a good idea to get to know someone better. My husband and I have been married 9 years and together 11 years, when we first started dating, he came around every single day, although I wasn't looking for a serious relationship, but the love bug struck me and within 4 mos we were living together, it's been happily ever after since then, so you just never know. Good luck!
2007-05-07 07:40:50 · answer #6 · answered by Dee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you're right in thinking this is a little fast. I would have thought the same exact thing. Perhaps he just felt a really strong connection with you and felt as though he didn't need to waste any time in asking you to be his girlfriend. If you're still interested in him, but are a bit uncomfortable in thinking it's moving too fast, let him know that. If he's a good guy, he'll really listen to your feelings, respect them, and slow down. Good luck! :)
2007-05-07 07:40:22 · answer #7 · answered by doza1621 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you think it all went down too fast, then maybe it did. But look how fast life changes all around us. Most people who are looking for a LTR normally know exactly what they are looking for in someone. Maybe he felt that he found that with you. Never be afraid to admit things are moving to quickly for you.
2007-05-07 07:42:30 · answer #8 · answered by kissbutnevertell 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a totally personal decision here....What could be fast for you is nothing compared to another. Basically what you said in your opening question answered it all. If your uncomfortable in anything you do, don't do it. And if you feel if you slow things down, he might wander off, express how you feel. Backing off just because you feel weird makes anyone feel your not interested when in reality you are, you just don't want it to go tooo fast. So communicating and backing down is your best bet. Good luck !!!!
2007-05-07 07:42:44 · answer #9 · answered by the_wicked_itch_of_the_west 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your going to meet people off the internet then you should have a paid subscription to a background check service. You need to know who your talking to. If they are on the level you will have a full name, and phone number, where they live, and be able to call them anytime,
Run the background check!!!
A desparate guy wants everything fast. Take your time to filter them out.
2007-05-07 07:50:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋