How to explain death, heaven and souls to a 4 year old who is being raised Catholic, but I am not religious.?

Question

I want him to understand that my views differ from the church without confusing him. I want him to understand and appreciate the church's point of view and to know that different religions have other beliefs. We drive by a cemetery not far from our house, so this conversation comes up in the car often.

I am not religious, but my son is being raised Catholic because my husband and his family are very religious. I want him to understand that my views differ from the church, but to understand and appreciate the church's opinion and that there are other opinions as well. I want him to draw his own conclusion as he gets older.

Answer 1

At the age of 4, a child cannot comprend too much, especially the idea of conflicting points of view. You and your husband need to sit down and come up with an answer that you are both comfortable with; as your child grows older, there will be plenty of chances to offer different points of view.

One thing that you CAN say at this point is that not everyone thinks the same about this and that that is okay. Children at that age are still naturally open and that openness should be fostered.

My personal opinion is to keep it as simple as possible. Since I don't know your beliefs, I might be a bit off here, but I suggest these points:

* no one is really sure what happens after we die (back to the openness factor here)
* the people in the cemetaries are just bodies. We bury them because they are special and we treat people special all the time. But no, they are not going to come out of their graves
* God loves everyone and we believe that God will always take care of us.
* at this age, just say that heaven is being with God. I wouldn't go any further unless asked.

Hope that all helps!

Answer 2

I am answering Hindu point of view. This would fit to anyone of any age.
Death. No one is dying for ever. The soul which is a reflection of god never dies. The soul just leave this body which is just a material which decays after the soul goes off. You are the soul and not the body.
The most important thing for anyone in thier life time with this body is to do the best possible acts. For each of the actions there is a result. If you do bad action(karma) you get bad results, it can be now or later in your life. Hell is that point of time in life when you have sufferings due to your bad karmas.
Heaven is the time when you enjoy the results of your good karmas later in your life. Heaven and hell are both in this world not outside.

Answer 3

Answer his questions honestly at a level that he can understand. Keep it simple and basic. Then as he can understand more give him more details. Use examples and comparisons appropriate for his age. When you talk about how people have different beliefs use things like how not everyone has the same favorite color to help him understand the concept without saying one idea is better than the other just different.

Answer 4

I am a Catholic and my advice is that it is way too soon for your Son to hear this,in the Catholic church a child does not reach the age of reason until they are 7yrs old below this age it considers the child to be unable to grasp the theology involved, besides this your Son will recieve qualified instruction before making his first holy communion at around 7 or 8 yrs old.

Answer 5

First, I would suggest that you discuss this with your husband rather than with a bunch of strangers like us (?)

What does he think, feel and believe about what your son should or shouldn't be taught?

If you husband agrees that he should learn and hear about other philosophies, then fine, you have many options available to you.

I didn't hear you say that YOU knew anything (or what your believes were) about death, heaven and souls?

I believe that regardless of your situation, you are going to have many other opportunities to discuss these things with your son through his 'formative years'.

Why is it that you think, feel and believe that this is the most important thing that you can talk (or share) with your son?

I suspect that the most important thing is that you just love him, and always "be there" (physically, emotionally, and otherwise)--and the rest will take care of itself.

Answer 6

We have similar issues. We present our 3 year old with various view points. She seems to like the idea of reincarnation rather than heaven and hell.

Religion is confusing, so don't try and simply it. A simplistic view of religion and God seems to often lead to fanaticism.

James
http://www.isgodreligious.com

Answer 7

Are you able explain it to yourself in a way that makes you comfortable? If you can't then don't try it with your son. If you can then it really doesn't matter to explain it at this time anyway.

Recently I asked my 2 daughters "What's the best thing in the world?" My intelectual 7yo couldn't answer but my heart-warming 4yo pondered for a while then burst out with "Mummy Cuddles!!"

Just be his mummy, nothing else matters to him yet. :-)

Answer 8

Since Heaven IS a religious concept, you have no credentials once you admit that you have rejected religion. Just say that religious people have their opinions, and you have yours.

Answer 9

He'd have to be a very precocious 4 year old. Most children that age think very literally and have trouble grasping abstract concepts.

Answer 10

Why do you wish to confuse that little child in the first place ??

Is it not time for him to listen lullby, fancy stories... make friends...catch butterflies??

Let him grow naturally and dont force anything on him