Is this child abuse?

Question

my aunt lives next door to me and she hits her kids ( ages 7 and 9 ) not like abuses them but when shes mad she hits and pinches them and tells them to go to their room. I feel bad for the poor kids. The 7 year old girl is too young to understand and she likes her mom because shes all shes got besides her dad who abuses their 3 dogs. The 9 year old come over my house crying all the time telling me what he really thinks of his parents and i feel terrible i wish i could help but i know those kids dont want to be taken away from their parents they just want their parents to be nice to them . What should i do?

Answer 1

According to Social Services in my state (VA) it is not illegal or abusive to spank a child, even with a belt. The only stipulation is if marks are left and if they are, for how long.

Your question does not state how often the children are diciplined or what brings on the pinching, hitting and solitary punishment, so it is difficult to form a conclusion.

Talk with all of your family members (they may or may not notice what is going on) and try to figure out a solution with them. If that doesn't get you anywhere, perhaps you can speak with the children's guidance counselor at school. The most drastic option would be to contact Social Services or child protection in your area. It should be the absolute last resort. This family is in dire need of counseling. Mom and Dad included. Even if the kids are being unruly enough to warrent punishment, there are other creative ways to do it that Mom and Dad can learn in a parenting class offered through Social Services. Dad needs to take some anger management classes and never be allowed to own a pet.

Rember that the goal of Social Services is not to remove children from their homes. They really don't want to separate any child from their parents and families. That is why they offer so many classes and management sessions at no or low cost to families who need them.

Good luck with this ordeal.

Answer 2

You are really not specific enough about how hard she is hitting them, how often and under what circumstances. I don't believe in hitting children for every little thing like if a toy is left on the floor. A spanking may be warranted under extreme circumstances but over all I think these children are too old to be getting spanked and especially pinched. I would try to be there for the children. Talk to them as a friend and really get them to trust you so that they keep you in their confidence. Bottom line is if you feel in your heart these children are being abused then you need to do something. I would not contact the parents or like someone else said they may try to keep the children from you or the kids may not talk to you anymore. You can call social services in your area without leaving your name or contact teh children's school. I would also talk to others in your family about it who would understand and be helpful. I know this is a horrible situation for anyone to deal with and it's even worse when it's a member of your family. Be strong and Good Luck!!!!

Answer 3

Many parents who smack/hit their children don't realize the psychological effect this is having on the child. It would appear that these parents need help. Why don't you call Childline and get advice on what you can do to help to empower these children and make their voices heard. Additionally, you could suggest that either or both talk to Childline themselves. Additionally through talking to their school tutor, the children can be given access to a school counsellor. It is understandable that the children would imagine that to report this problem might mean that they would be taken away from their parents, but this would not necessarily be the case. Once reported, the social services would work towards helping to improve the family's situation, and it may take this wake up call for the parents to work towards becoming better parents. If you or the children decide to take this further and there is concern that the parents may step up the smacking as a result, you need to alert the authorities to this likelihood. Sometimes due to a lack of education or their own childhood experiences, hitting parents believe that to be physical is the best way to discipline their children. I believe there is love in this household, and with love present, nothing is insurmountable. Good luck.

Answer 4

Talk to their mum and tell her that her kids are talking to you about it and that they don't like her discipline measures.She is stepping over the line by pinching them and smacking a child when your angry is not when you should smack them. Other kids suffer worse abuse than that. Are they looked after every other way.Maybe she needs anger management and a parenting course.There are other ways to discipline kids instead of physical punishment.You are a good neighbor and keep a close eye out for more alarming
behavior from this mum because she is overstepping the line but I think having her kids taken off her will be more harmful to the kids then her being educated about what she is doing.Ring a child abuse center and ask them out of curiosity what they think your options are and be annomous about it arm your self up with brochures about this when you see aunt again and if the kids are giving her the angers offer to let them have time out with you.

Answer 5

Honestly from a legal stand point as long as there is no lasting bruises then not much can be done. If you question whether or not these children are being abused, interferences is not usually the best idea because it can make things worse for the children if abuse is an issue. call the number for your area and they will check it out. If it is nothing, then they will leave it alone, if it is then social services will step in. To get the number yahoo search toll free child abuse hot line and find your area.

Answer 6

I AM a parent who believes in spanking a child under certain (specific) circumstances and this is absolutely abuse. Any time a parent strikes, pinches, or injures a child in this manner it is abuse. Corporal punishment is NEVER administered in anger or as a means for the parent to "vent" their feelings.
Since you are a refuge for this little girl, I would NOT jeopardize this by confronting the parents (who would likely in turn keep the child from seeing you.). Child protective services does allow for confidential reporting, maybe have another family member intervene without mentioning your name, or contact the families spiritual advisor (minister).

Answer 7

Honestly it doesnt sound the mother is doing anything to serious to me. She hits them - OK well I worked in child welfare and unless she is causing bruises that's not even reportable, parents are allowed to use physical discipline
She yells at them - I dont know anyone who's parents didnt yell at them
Pinching - a more unusual choice but still not enough to give cps legal ground to enter the home
Sends them to thier room - ug huh and?
You can try talking to the parents or have another family member do so and you can disagree w/ how they parent but where I live what they are doing is w/in thier legal rights.

Answer 8

It believe either one of them want extra awareness, animal abuse, and little one abuse. In my opinion they're each as dangerous a every different. No dwelling creature will have to pass via the abuse a few pass via.

Answer 9

Your parents may or may not want to get involved. Especially if it is family.
If you want to do everything you can to help them. Write down their address and names. Call the local police department and tell them what you told us. There is a detective who works with children they can pass the information on to. If they believe it is worth looking into, a social worker will be sent to evaluate the family. Often times they will get help they need to deal with their children better.
If it is bothering you so much that your asking us here, there is definitely something wrong. Listen to your conscience and do your part.

It is great to know that people like you care.

Answer 10

if she seriously smacks them then yes but light hits nothing wrong. sending them to their room is probably the best thing to do. have a talk with their mother suggest she cuts down on sugary foods and screen time. they may just have too much energy. weekend sport would help them burn energy and if dad takes them and gets involved in the team they can bond. about the dogs go to an animal protection agency and see about that.