Is this too much to ask for in a potential boyfriend?

Question

1. He must have a steady, reliable job.
2. He must pay his own rent, utilities and other bills, as well as buy the bulk of his food.
3. He must have a license, own a car and drive regularly.
4. He must want to have sex AT LEAST five times a week.
5. He must be able to control his liquor consumption habits.
6. He must eat from all of the five food groups, unless something like an allergy or his religion prevents him from doing so.
7. He must like children, particularly my child.
8. He must be willing to come to my Christmas parties at work, and the military ball, and he must dress appropriately.
8. He must not have any warrants out for his arrest.
9. He must not partake in illegal drugs.
10. He must not be predudiced against any group of people for their race, religion, ethnic group or culture.

Am I asking too much? Because I have had one hell of a time finding a guy who fits these qualities.

So, basically then, you guys are saying I should have stayed with my last boyfriend, who didn't work, didn't have a car, drank so much he pissed the bed every night, had a couple of warrants out for his arrest and had sex with me only two times a month or so? That was a good relationship and I should not have been so picky and stayed with a man for whom I paid all the bills, drove everywhere and slept in a puddle of his piss every night?

Answer 1

Nope, not unreasonable at all.

Depending on your age though the "like your child" part might be hard to satisfy. Especially if that child was the result of unplanned pregnancy. The choices each of us makes defines who we each are.

Number 3 (have a car part) might be unreasonable depending on where you live. In New York, having a car isn't as practical as having one somewhere else.

-RNG

Answer 2

You can ask for whatever you want. I was happily married and never cheated, nor struck my wife. We were equal partners and when she died young, she insisted that I had to promise to raise our child. Which I did, and have a good relationship with our now-adult daughter. But if you want to be a stickler for accuracy and honesty, five of those ten I either fall a bit short on or completely miss.

Now let's turn you toward the mirror. If I were to meet you, you are so demanding that I doubt that I'd be interested in you, regardless of how young or foxy you were. If my daughter would meet you, I bet she'd warn me away from you. You're altogether too demanding. Sex five times a week sounds good in theory and it's possible in practice, but you don't get it unless you cultivate a close marriage. You sound too demanding to be able to do that.

Answer 3

It is not too much to ask and is quite normal. Number 7 might take out a few of the people that fit this bill but you never know. Number 10 takes me out of the running, but I can hide my many prejudices in public and that's all that normal people ask (except they let me hate pedophiles and such openly). You want an average normal guy, but it depends on if you are an average normal girl? Since that's what they tend to look for. Actually a normal guy looks for a girl better than himself, as all people who are out there looking do. Why would anyone want to settle for themselves unless they think they are awesome?

Answer 4

No, you have to ask for what you want or you won't get it. However, I think a couple of these are a little extreme, such as the eating thing, and the sex thing. Be careful, you might pass up a really great man if you don't give them a chance for 1 little thing.

Answer 5

Are they involved with anyone.. are they in love with anyone are they dating is there someone special, or that they see regularly did they just end it with someone, or did they just have a fight with someone,, how long has it been since THEY were in a serious relationship.. then do they have family ever been married, children how many , names and location where is his mom and dad are they close, sisters /brothers etc what are his interests,hobbies/favorite free time recreation/ do they live alone,and where, what are their religious/spiritual beliefs do they like the work they are in and why Then i ask them how did you get so lucky to have me.. do you realize, i am a "goddess" what are you going to do, to protect yourself, from all of your competition,,as some would be willing to "KILL" just to have a chance to HAVE ME me..\\ LOL LOL LOL LOL..... I AM JUST KIDDING,,.. I JUST WANTED, TO SURPRISE YOU,, ok. well that is about it,, bye,, ps.. i ask them to give me notice for a date.. don't just call at the last minute and ask for a date or to "come over" AND TO PLS CAL ME IF THEY WILL BE LATE OR NEED TO CANCEL..

Answer 6

I understand that you feel like you need to have standards , but as long as you are OK with a man you meet that does meet those standards to be that potentially judgemental of you?

Do you want to meet what you feel is the "right" guy, only to have him have his own list that excludes a woman with kids? or blonds? (hair color really not specific).

Perhaps you should be more open to just certain standards and go from there.

Answer 7

nothing is to much to ask for in a guy just keep in mind the more you ask the harder its going to find one but it also means when you do find the guy you are looking for he'll be everything you want right??!! good luck on the search and don't give up your values there is someone out there with the qualities you are looking for all of them.

Answer 8

I find it really disconcerting that you would actually create a list to judge potential boyfriends by, it ruins the whole romance of meeting someone etc. And to be honest, unless you're going to marry him some of those things are none of your business.

Answer 9

Yes I think you are. Settle for about 8 out of the 10 and you would be okay. Remember, noone is perfect, not even us men.

Answer 10

yes, most definitely, you have to many demands for a potential boyfriend and i am sure there would be more added to your list when you got the boyfriend. you would scare him away .
you need to work on the things you are looking for in a potential boyfriend , remember no one is perfect in this world, only some people whom think they are.
good luck