Are these signs of a PEDOFILE?

Question

im aksing 1st off becuase im pregnant with this mans baby girl and i am scared 2 go after child support if he will get custody and could be potentially a pedofile. here is what i know about him ok:
1. he collects ALL of Hilary Duff and Mary Kate and Ashelys dvds ( all the way back to going to grandmothers house)
2. He lives with his dad
3. Hes 29.
4. Puts puzzles togheter,
5. Also likes other kids movies such as Ice Age, and the Avengers.
6. Found a Huslter Barely Legal dvd under his bed when he was in the bathroom ( this is the last time i saw him and i was already preg so it was too late to get teh signal )

Please give your honest opions here.

HES 29 years old

Answer 1

The information that you shared is not enough to really differentiate him from someone who is simply immature and I'm wondering if there is a gut feeling you have that has raised your concern as well. Pedophiles often show a number of characteristics that make them stand out from others:

1-a history of jobs or volunteer activities which allow access to children
2-a preference for spending time with children more than adults and attempts to discourage other adults from participating
3-a tendency to become overly physical with children, even those the person does not know well
4-giving gifts to children the person does not know well-particularly inappropriate gifts or gifts that the parents would not approve of
5-often tends to break rules or act as though the rules don't apply to him/her
6-shows pornography or tells dirty jokes/uses sexual language around children
7-allows children to do things that their parents would not approve of
8-seeks opportunities to be alone with children when other adults are not around

Pedophiles often are socially gifted individuals who demonstrate genuine skill in relating to children and they frequently "groom" parents and communities by showing and apparent desire to help or assist children and often strive to become "pillars of the community" in order to decrease suspicion. They are less likely to appear as "loners" or behave in ways that attract suspicion or negative attention.

Your best barometer in evaluating concerns about your baby's father is how he actually behaves with children. While the DVD's show some immaturity, I would be more suspicious if he uses them or a large collection of toys to lure children to spend time with him or if he was engaged in a job or volunteer activity which allows him to spend unsupervised time with kids. I'm not suggesting that you disregard your concerns, but rather look for specific indicators that would confirm or deny your gut feeling.

Answer 2

Well there's no telling. Perhaps he has some condition where he stopped developing emotionally at some stage. they say sometimes something traumatic happens to some people at a certain age and they stop developing emotionally. I'm not saying this is the case. it could be possible BUT mary kate and ashley and hilary are over 18. maybe he just likes girls that age. there are lots of guys who are into the barely legal school girl thing. 29 and living with dad is pretty normal for some people. especially if he has a minimum wage job and can't make it on his own. I don't see a big deal with puzzles. lots of people like them. If they're kiddie puzzles, that's weird. also, there's nothing wrong w/liking cartoon movies. I know lots of guys who do. but only you know if you're getting a vibe that something's wrong. I would really follow my gut.

Answer 3

He's not, well not based upon the information you presented. If you went to court, or a cop, and shared the above information, it would only be good for a good laugh. The point is that unless he specifically has a "sexual" (keyword 'sex' because thats the legal definition of pedophilia) lust or involvement with children, he's not one. Theres perfectly normal-seeming people who become pedophiles (people who have jobs, go to church, raise families, etc).

As far as child support, go for it.

As far as custody, well, unless you are a completely unfit mother (I mean really unfit) the courts will lean in your favor and give you custody before him. There is no legal merit(as you have so far proven) to bar him from seeing his child. Sorry, just the way it is. Unless you have HARD evidence that he has or intended to commit sexual acts with a child, or possess pornographic material involving children (no, 'Barely Legal' doesn't count as everyone is 18+ in those magazines), theres nothing you can do but keep digging for dirt.

Answer 4

Okay, so I think that the Hilary Duff and MK and Ashley DVD thing is weird and the Hustler DVD is weird. The puzzles and kids movies aren't that much of a warning sign because I and my b/f like to do those things once in a while. I think that you sould look into it a little more just to be on the safe side. Maybe ask him questions or search for more stuff.

Answer 5

How old is he. Has he ever shown any interest in little children? Does he hang out at playgrounds to watch the kids? If you put his name on the birth certificate, he will automatically get visitation rights. Does he know that you are pregnant?

He may just be incredibly immature, or very young. If you are going to get state assistance, you will have to have a paternity test, so he will be aware of the baby. And the state will make you go after support.

There are a lot of questions to answer, I guess that is why you should know a guy better, and be married before you start a family.

Answer 6

usually older , never had kids, enjoys time with children more than adults, good reputation , trusting, charming and kind and not the typical monster people perceive, social, usually finds women with children already, single moms. but the most dangeroug pedofiles is a female pedofile.,,,,ususally they have a advantage because they dont have a penis and can workaround the typical bad man mentality around the female community and it is rarely reported

Answer 7

I think you're being irrational. I have Disney DVDs.
Just because he likes Hilary Duff doesn't mean anything!!
He lives with his Dad - so?
He's 29 - so?
He puts puzzles together - so?

That poor man having people saying he's a pedophile. Imagine people saying that about you. Everyone has their personality quirks.

Answer 8

I wouldn't be too worried about the Hustler dvd because most men have stuff like that but if you're under 18 and tried to get child support in anyway other than asking him for it every month he would be arrested for rape.

Answer 9

3,4 and 5, no.
2,I don't think so
1 and 6 , maybe -I'd definitely freak out , too. It would make me feel very uncomfortable, mostly #6
He's still the father. You have to have him involved even if you voice your concerns at the same time.

Answer 10

#1 is definitely weird, but the rest is really pretty normal. Maybe he has some sort of fettish? He should probably get some counselling. You should too in order to help you cope if he does turn out to be pedophile, because he is the father of your child and you will have to deal with him for the rest of your life.