My bestfriend died last year when I was 13. I miss her so much, I can't even explain the loneliness that I have been dealing with. I ache to talk to her about everything thats been going on, I want to be able to hear her voice, and have another sleep over with her. I cry every night for her. Will this pain ever go away? I feel like I will never be free from this heart ache.
2007-05-04 18:17:21 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
you will move on eventually! i had to go through the same thing but i was a little older, 17, but yes, you will move on. you will never forget her, you will always wish for "just one more day" but the times that you think about her will get farther and farther apart and things will get easier for you i promise. it is so hard to grasp the concept of death at such a young age, i know, but you must realize that you will get to be with her one day again,. what i always think is "would they want to see me sitting around crying and sad all the time? no they wouldn't." so i would try to think of all the things they would want me to do with my life and do them. i am now 27 years old and i still think about my friend from time to time. it is completly natural to do this. sorry my answere is so long but i just want you to realize that there will be a day when you go, i will miss you forever, but i have to live my life now. i hope that i helped and i am so so sorry for your loss. my email address is ima_radcliff@hotmail.com if you ever need to talk, or have any questions feel free to drop me a line, sometimes it's easier to talk to someone that you don't have to look at about things like this.
2007-05-04 18:36:16 · answer #1 · answered by ima_radcliff 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My older brother died when I was ten and I've been in the same situation as you. I felt hopeless and longed to just see him in the flesh again. It will be pretty rough for about the first year and a half. Since you're so young, and this is probably your first major death you should go to a psychiatrist and be evaluated for depression because younger people tend to process trauma differently than adults. I've been on Prozac for almost a year and time has also helped. This feeling will go away and if you need support, feel free to e-mail me at xxbeautiful_redheadxx@yahoo.com
2007-05-05 01:32:05 · answer #2 · answered by xxbeautiful_redheadxx 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can relate to your pain. Although I have not lost a best friend I did just bury my oldest son the last week of November. This pain is normal and it may never completely go away but one way I deal with it is to realize that death is just another part of life.
I remember and am grateful for the time I had with my son and I miss him on a daily basis. I don't cry so much anymore except for times like right now while writing to you about it. I do still cry sometimes - especially at night when it is quiet and no one else is around.
Another way I deal with this is by trying to honor him. I do this by looking for ways to improve my life. My son loved life and was always making friends and trying new things. So now I try to do the same.
One thing I plan to do is to plant a weeping willow tree in my front yard in his honor. To me it is a sign of strength through sadness. My son would want me to stay strong and live a long happy life. He wouldn't want me to cry for him forever.
I believe your friend wouldn't want you to be sad. She would want you to remember the great times you had together and she would want you to continue to have great times in your life. It's ok to feel sad but it's also ok to go on with your life and be happy.
I hope this helps some.
2007-05-05 01:36:21 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It will fade with time, but please don't feel like you need to have a deadline to "get over it." You lost someone close to you. You have a right to grieve for her. If you think it would help, try talking to a counselor about your feelings.
I recommend the book "The Lovely Bones," which is about a community dealing with the death of a 14 year old girl, told from the girl's perspective. It's a fantastic book and really portrays grief very well and honestly.
2007-05-05 01:30:30 · answer #4 · answered by Eileen 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It takes time to heal from the death of a loved one. The pain never fully goes away, it just hurts less.
Talk to her everyday when you want, she can hear you.
Remember the good times that you had. Cherish those memories forever.
No one grieves the same way. Maybe you can speak to your parents or a counselor about how you are feeling.
2007-05-05 01:35:48 · answer #5 · answered by bratty brat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My coach lost his daughter in a car accident a year ago and he hasn't fully healed. I don't think you can completely heal, but you can continue living your life. He does it by running, playing music, writing, and saying great things and stories about his daughter. I guess the way he talks to his daughter is by talking about her accomplishments and what he can remember her to other people.
If you're religious, you can pray and talk to her. Does you and your bestfriend share other friends? If so, you and those other friends should express all your feelings to one another. It helps knowing that there are other people experiencing the same thing you are.
2007-05-05 01:29:39 · answer #6 · answered by F00LZ 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are hurting real bad. I am so sorry for you. You can talk to her tell her how you feel. I know you are saying that stupid. It does help. Write a journal about the things you did, about how you feel. Do something that she would have liked to do. Plant a tree in memory of her. Talk about her to your other friends, Call her parents, talk to them. They are going through the same thing, you are going through. Maybe between all of you, You can think of something special to do.
My niece was 7 when she died, every year on her birthday and the day she died. They let off a bunch of ballons, with notes on them. They have e-mail address on them, asking people to e-mail them and tell them where they are from. Just to see how far the ballons have went. Make up a E-Mail address with her name in it.
What I am going to say next, you might not believe, time does help, my niece died 2 years ago. This was the hardest thing I ever went through in all of my life. I Just could not believe that she was gone. It just did not make since. We cried and cried. We did this for a long time. Know we are doing things to help others. While helping others we are helping ourselves. Its good to laugh again, Here her favorite song and smile again.
You need to talk to your parents and ask them if one of them could or you call a mental health clinic and ask them where is
meeting place for teenagers, dealing in grief. This could help you talking to other teens going through what you are.
You take care of your self. Your friend would not want you to be hurting this bad. What would she say to you?
2007-05-05 01:54:10 · answer #7 · answered by Bandit 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
like you would move on from any other tragedy. just some tragedies take longer to get over than others.
2007-05-05 01:31:50 · answer #8 · answered by Kristenite’s Back! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
say good bye god bless and get over it, its not going to bring her back, now make a good life for yourself, to make up where she left off, make her proud
2007-05-05 01:21:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was gonna say get drunk, but I guess that's not really an option for ya.
2007-05-05 01:25:25 · answer #10 · answered by columind99 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋