VERY SERIOUS question (mostly) for Christians... Would you allow a sex offender in your congregation?

Question

Why or why not? How do you reconcile the ideas of forgiveness and ministering to all people with the idea of protecting the least of these (i.e. keeping children safe)? Any thoughts or experiences in this issue? Thanks.

Mostly interested in what Christians think/feel on this issue, but other perspectives are welcome too. No hateful comments, please.

Kev: No, I understand the broadbrushing thing too. I have a relative who is disabled and mentally challenged and was unable to defend himself against the false accusations of a teenage girl, and so is now a "sex offender". I understand there are all kinds. But I think you (and everyone else) got the INTENT of the question without having to get too specific.

Answer 1

I think that by denying the person in your congregation would go against the very principals that you're probably there to worship. God died so we could be forgiven. If you deny forgiveness, you're, in effect, compromising your faith. Assuming the person wants to join your congregation in an effort to repent for his sins and to lead a moral life, it seems that is exactly what the purpose of Church is. You cant only want to save the "good" people.
I understand your hesitation and concern...I am a parent myself and would be concerned. It would also matter to me what the nature and degree of the previous offense was. Perhaps the thing to do would be to set up some guidelines with the individual privately. I don't think it would be unfair or wrong to approach the individual and explain that his past makes people uncomfortable and raises alarm with other members of the congregation.
Maybe one-on-one faith sessions would be an alternative or finding him an all adult religious study group, etc.?

Answer 2

Interesting question. At a church I used to go to, the music/youth director was accused of molesting boys. He was accused much later after he had left that church and became the music minister at another church. Once it was found out, he was asked to leave. Out of embarrassment, he willingly left.

Both churches sent letters to every member of the congregation, even to those who didn't know this man and informed us all of the situation. I believe the churches handled it well and did right by getting the word out.

Last thing I heard, there was a court case against him.

I'm not sure he'll be welcomed at any church because of the danger to young boys and possibly even to himself because even Christian parents may feel the need to defend their chidlren. He'll probably have to move out of state to fit in anywhere. God is gracious, however; I hope he doesn't turn away from God completely, but repents and gets some serious therapy. Then, he needs to stay the heck away from children.

Answer 3

In some large churches how would identify a sex offender?
Do you think they would identify themself to a whole congregation of people?
Iam not going to tell a sex offender that God would not forgive him because that would be a lie.
However a sex offender is entitled to go to church as long as
that in no way violates any part of his parole.
If in some way that does violate his parole because of the
contact with children issue then a church should have a visitation program in this persons home and be ministered to that way through the love of God.
If the person is legally able to go to church and the leadership of the church is aware of this then this person should be extended the love of God as well as close monitoring from the leadership of the church. 1:1 bible study and prayer sessions should be done. The person should not be involved in any childrens ministry but he could be used in other areas of outreach. This person and the leadership should not broadcast the individual's past sin but at the same time the leadership would have the spiritual responsibility for monitoring and assisting this person's spirtual development through the word of God and the power of the Holy Spirit demonstrated in love yet also through wisdom.

Answer 4

Yes I would. We all struggle with sin just not the same sin. Sex offenders can repent just like everyone else. I would feel best if this person had a few close christian friends in their life that they could confide in and also confess any inappropriate sexual thoughts.

I would be careful and probably never leave them alone with my child. I think this is just being wise. Just like if I knew someone used to be an alcoholic, I would not stick a drink in their hand at a get together. You want to trust but also be wise. Sex offenders are HUMAN just like all other 6 billion people on the planet and need to keep control of their sin, just like all other Christians.

Answer 5

In answering this question - one must first ask if this individual is truly repentant, or if they are using Religion as a basis for early parole?

The heart of the individual is what is important and not the past actions of that person.

I would accept a truly repentant individual and work with them to create a life for them outside of the baser needs and hope to open the lines of communication and trust for that person should those desires ever wish to return.

I would not condemn an individual but work to help them should they truly which to be something different then what they were.

From my understanding and teachings of the "New Testament" No person is beyond change or forgiveness.

A Christian & Mother of two

Answer 6

Well you have many things to consider. State law might prohibit the person from being within a certain distance of children. If its more of a small bible study group say ten people and theres no children it shouldnt be a problem.

With a larger group where theres children to consider this question is a more difficult one. Does the majority of the congregation have it in their hearts to forgive and trust God will do a work in that persons life.

Answer 7

Anyone can change by the true power of Jesus. We wouldn't turn him/her away.

Would he/her be allowed to work with the children? Of course not. At our Church, those working with the children, even volunteers, go through a background check. We also have tight security to even get into the children's area. You must have an ID with yourself and your child's picture on it with a family number on it as well, issue by the church. We do have security check points to check these id's at all entrances and exits.

Aside from the Children's area, they would be welcome to participate in the adult studies, etc. Adults would need to use there own discretion as they do anywhere else they go in life.

We will minister to all people and help them find forgiveness in Christ, if they are serious, Jesus will do the rest. Meanwhile, we always protect the least of these, the children, at all times.

Answer 8

Possibly.... If I did, I would tell all the adults in the congregation, because they need to know. And I would (try) to ensure that he was never left alone (without another adult). I would use my own judgement, and ask God, to see if I thought he was actually repentent or not and had changed. If he had prior convictions I don't think I'd let him in the congregation.
Actually, this is what I think I would do (IF he seemed ok enough, repentant, changed) - I would let him join a home group/cell group (with only adults, in an evening at someones home) but not be involved in Sunday services or anything else.Because I would find it difficult to think that he had "truly" changed, and safety of others is more important than him attending church.

Answer 9

Great question. You'll get a star from me.

When I was looking for a daycare provider, I often saw ads in the paper for "Christian lady wants to babysit for children under 6", I skipped over it immediately.

Trying not to be too hateful, but just the word Christian these days to me means "corrupt".
I was baptised in a methodist church, and went to bible school, and I have had wayyyyy too many first hand experiences of the silence that a congregation has when one of their own has committed an offense.

Answer 10

The word sex offender is such a wide word. My 18 year old friend was jailed for 2 years for having sex with his 17 year old girlfriend who was turning 18 in less than a month. She is a daddy's girl and let daddy go along with the lawsuit and pressing charges and all. Now he is labled as a sex offender for what. For someone that is an adult and sleeps with little kids, that is a different story, I wouldn't feel comfortable myself bringing my kids to church if I knew he was there. Not because he might try something, cuz that would never happen with me there, but he could be looking at my little girls in a sexual way in church none the less, and I could not handle that. It may be cruel, but if you want to be a sick person, you have to accept that society won't accept you either, keep him out of church or creat a new time like a late night mass where people like him can go or others that may not want to be seen in church, they can go late at night.