i ama about to have a child with the man who promised to marry me but he has decided he is not interested in me nor the baby. i am keeping the baby bcos icant imagine myself going thru physical pain to remove the child and more so bcos of my beliefs. what do u guys suggest i do. i live in my country but he lives abroad. my family is distraught and i am just going with the tide for now. people tell me i am strong but i tell them i have no other choice. and frankly i dont want to be dishonorable in my actions by doing the seemingly right thing but actually wrong thing. please answer me.
2007-05-03 22:09:49 · 17 answers · asked by hef 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Wow!!! That's one of the saddest stories I've ever heard, Hef.
I think what you said about not having any other choice but to be strong is very true. To me, that means you know what you need to do ... it just sucks doing it. You really seem to have a good head on your shoulders and I really admire your morals.
This I am sure of: Time heals all pain.
I don't expect that helps now, but maybe someday you can look back and know it is true. Do what ever you think is right and try to forget about this loser.
Good luck, Hef!!!
2007-05-03 22:20:03 · answer #1 · answered by Big Feet 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know a friend of mine, she is Asian , Imagine the culture. She was a stewardess and got involved with one of a frequent passenger (French) ,...and got pregnant.
She had to quit from her job ( International flights) , having a feodalistic as well as educated family ( Imagine, her elder sisters are Med Doc, and Civil Engineer, llittle sister Architect and Accountant ), was the worst situation for her at that time.
Her parents were so annoyed , angry etc etc, so they locked her in the village in their farm. I knew this because she wrote me from the farm.
Well, baby was born, a son, very good looking, healthy, then she went to Law school and become a Lawyer. Work, successful ,but never get married . She never want to talk about the past, That is one real sample.
There are plenty cases like yours; You are not the only one. Some get married and have a happy marriage, some not. That is individual choice.
OK, cheer up. World does not stop, it keeps moving. Your baby will get bigger and bigger , it needs your strength and love. You are the only to depend on, no point for you to look backward and sad.
PS . so far i dont see that her son feel strange by having no father around him, maybe It is God help; Some of his cousins lost their father , died of heart attacked when they were still infant .
2007-05-04 05:52:29 · answer #2 · answered by bill s 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I´m so sorry to hear that and I know it´s difficult specially when you are pregnant because it´s a emotional roller coaster. You have your family and friends and they will always be there to support you and with time it will get better. Unfortunately it does not just happen over night and a person should take it one day at a time. I promise you once your baby is there, you will be to occupied to even think of the man that broke your heart and he will miss out on the most wonderful thing in the world....
2007-05-04 05:15:28 · answer #3 · answered by Ladybird 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't really know how to get over a broken heart other than to let time heal it but I suggest that if the guy is not interested in you don't chase him. It would really make you look pathetic. Instead prove to him, to your family, to the world, and most importantly, to yourself, that you are strong enough to raise you child by yourself. It would be a tough road since I know a lot of single moms and my mom also raised me by herself, but trust me it would be better for you to start living life than mope around the house weeping for your broken heart. I have one suggestion though, as your child grows up, no matter how stressed out from work you are always make time to talk to him/her and always have a hug ready for him/her. It helps lessen the pain of having only one parent.
2007-05-04 05:34:05 · answer #4 · answered by JK Sy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone is different..this one is for you to decide,for there really is no right or wrong answer.If it were me,i'd abort it.I couldn't imagine raising a child on my own,and wouldn't want my baby to have to grow up wondering how come everyone else has a daddy but not him/her.I also wouldn't want the child to have to struggle like I know that I have,feel pain,shame,loss,embarrassment,fear..idk.Just don't think i'd be enough but if you have your family behind you then that's great,best of luck to ya:)
2007-05-04 05:26:53 · answer #5 · answered by Jana:) 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I feel know how it feels to be heartbroken....it kills. It's worse than physical pain. I think its great that your keeping the baby. If you decide that you don't think you can raise it, you call always put it up for adoption. As for the guy, what he's doing is horrible...but at the same time...you can't make him love you or want to be with you. All you can do is hope for the best. Hang in there. Best of luck.
2007-05-04 05:18:19 · answer #6 · answered by Matt S 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you are committed to raising your baby and can afford to do so, and are willing to give up everything else,..I commend you. Go after child support from the dead beat dad. If you cannot take proper care of the baby, consider adoption. Broken hearts are a fact of life, in time it will be better, I promise, it just takes time.
2007-05-04 05:15:01 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i want u 2 kow dat God luvs u, keep on praying and never u think about it. keep also d baby bcos there is nothing God can not do. 4giv him and never u hold anything against him, pretend as if nothing has happened between u both and you will see the miracle of God in ur life. God bless u.
2007-05-04 05:39:14 · answer #8 · answered by Eneh M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You gotta be as strong as you can be. Forget all about this guy. He is garbage. Take care of yourself and the baby. later find a new man. That's it.
Listen to music, watch movies, be around family and friends so you won't think about your worries so much.
2007-05-04 05:17:35 · answer #9 · answered by Renegade 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
be strong girl put into your mind no man is worth your tears. just don't feel down go out and see the world i want through this before i lost 4 kids and now I'm so happy hope to God to blass my kids i got re-married and i have twin boys so wake up girl and see the good thing in life
2007-05-04 05:19:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋