Are you any more or less happy than you were 10 years ago?

Question

Everyone has high and low periods in their lives. Average those out.

Most folks tend to recall mostly the good times or mostly the bad, depending on temperament. Try to be honest with yourself.

We tend to look at material wealth, security, status or wisdom and assume we must be happier because we've attained this. Question whether this is really so.

Is happiness truly dualistic? That is, do we always experience about the same happiness because it's defined by our experience of unhappiness? (Light defined by the darkness) Do we always find ourselves standing at the center of our own self defined polarity regardless of what we do or do not accomplish?

Again try not to gauge your happiness on what it would be like to lose what you've gained. That will create the illusion of increased happiness.

Answer 1

I'd say that happiness is too dynamic to be quantified as better or worse between two time periods. I enjoyed my life 10 years ago, and I enjoy it now, but I enjoy different things and focus differently. Nine years ago, I survived a very bad car accident that made me feel that the time after it was a gift. If it weren't for the accident, would I have had this unique perspective on the time afterwards. 17 years ago, I became a violent crime survivor. That's a bad thing to have happen to you, right? But somehow the very bad opened the door to the very good; I did not do any serious spiritual seeking before that occurrence. Dualistic might be a good descriptor; if I hadn't been through these difficult times, would I still be tripping mindlessly down a primrose path, thinking I was happy while sleepwalking? Who knows? As for all of us being the center of the universe, I think that it takes long, hard experience to realize that we aren't the center of everything.

I had a better job 10 years ago, but I'm not complaining since it didn't pay all that well and I have a quieter life now. Tradeoffs and adaptability have been the watchwords of my life. I often think that unhappiness is born of an inability to adapt, an inability to occasionally put others first and pursue life as a group project, rather than a "me and mine first" proposition.

I finish this rambling post with a quote from a helpful bystander at my accident: "Lie down! You might be paralyzed!" I think the onlookers were more frightened than I was, and I was upside down in the SUV! What irony, eh?

Answer 2

I was really happy 10 years ago - but then, I was about 16 and my life centered around me.
I would call myself "content" now. I am happy, but subdued. I would much rather continue life as I have it now than go back to 10 years ago. A lot happens in 10 years - I've got a hubby and 2 kids - a house of our own. Is happiness defined by the darker times? I'm sure - if I was homeless 10 years ago and lived in an apartment now, I'd think I'd be somewhat happy about that step up. But I could also see someone who, maybe had a house of their own 10 years ago and now lives in an apartment as being unhappy. A sense of loss of what they once had. So happiness being based on unhappy experience is as true as unhappiness being based on happy experiences. A self-defined polarity sound both poetic and about right if you ask me. I'm not sure if it would be regardless of accomplishment, though. The more you accomplish, the higher goals you set for yourself. If I moved from my parents house, to apartment, to my own house - those are all steps up and happy accomplishments - now if for some reason I were to move back to the apartment after the house, most would consider that a setback and possibly have unhappy thoughts in having to do so. I don't know why I used housing in all my examples - I have nothing against apartments by the way.

Answer 3

I think this is an interesting point of view. I can say that I am happier now than I was 10 years ago, but it has nothing to do with my material possessions. It simply has to do with my life experiences and my circumstances. If I said that I am thankful for my parents only because I saw someone that had no parents, then I am not truly thankful for my parents because I didn't realize their great ability at parenting until I realized there coule be the chance that they aren't there at all. If I am happy only because I haven't lost one thing or another, that isn't happiness at all. Like you said, you cannot say that it is light only by seeing t here is no darkness. You should have realized it was light first, without having to compare the two polar opposites.

I am happy because I have come to a point in my life where I am doing things for me -- I have grown spiritually the way that I want to be growing. Not everything is perfect, but it's my life. I am happy simply because I am alive. I don't need a great car, job, house, or anything else to prove that I am happy. My happiness comes from the peace with the fact that life doesn't have to be perfect in order to be great.

Answer 4

Good question. I'm not sure I understand the last paragraph, though.

I think I'm a bit less happy than I was 10 years ago, but MUCH more happy than I was 8 years ago. My happiness has always been defined by my closeness with God and my faith (in myself, people and God). That fluctates. I seem to be on an up-trend at the moment.

Since I've never had material wealth or security (by Western standards, anyway), I can't comment as to whether I would be happier with more money or not. That said, I know I was very UNHAPPY when I was floundering in debt, and much less anxious (and more able to be happy) when I was able to pay it off.

Answer 5

much happier now then 10 yrs ago!
it has nothing to do with material wealth,security or status. And since wisdom is only gained through experience, well, i have a little of that.
Today happiness is all about being sober and living life on life's terms. It's about doing the right thing just because it's right!
Today happiness is following my own path of which i have chosen, simply not following anothers because i was to ignorant to seek out my own way.
Good Question !!

Answer 6

Much more at peace and happy than I was in my 20s. Sure I had fun but it was also a lot of ups and downs, that is only natural during that time period. Im 30 now and at the happiest time in my life. That came with growth and learning some life lessons, some much harder than others. And my happiness has nothing to do with material possessions, it is an inner peace that only came from getting in touch with the Most High and understading my place and purpose in the universe. When you truly know who you are, a Divine relflection of the Most High, everything else just falls into place.

I feel experience is the best teacher!

Answer 7

I'm far happier than I was ten years ago. Ten years ago, I was being battered by an abusive, alcoholic parent and watching the other parent slowly die. I was in constant trouble, and had a hard time figuring out any sort of direction in life. Now I'm an honors student in college, with great friends and a very loving relationship. I have my own house, work hard, am independent, learn new things every day, and feel spiritually at peace.

Answer 8

Ten years ago, I was in a different bar every night. I was a veteran of two failed marriages and had no priorities in life except me.

Today, I no longer visit Jim or Jack and have been married to the same woman for 8 1/2 years with three wonderful children. I am active in the ministry we are a part of and my wife and I minister in our county jail every week. I would have to say that i am definately better off now than I was ten years ago.

Answer 9

I went from being miserable and being on antidepressants to being ecstatically happy and being so ever since I was baptised by the Holy Spirit and I became a Gnostic Christian. it was literally almost an instant event. I now see everyday the beauty in the world, humanity, God, everything, and am in love again with life, God, my husband, and people and the world in general. It's wonderful.

Happiness is all relative. If you know the true state of the world and people around you without the cloudiness of Self/Ego, then you are truly happy since you can transcend the material world. That's the secret to true happiness, being one with God, and not worrying about anything in life again and going with what God gives you, since you know He'll take care of earthly things if you concentrate on heavenly things!

Answer 10

I may be a little more happy but this is so subjective as it is also dependent on ones chemical make up all I can say is the more I live and learn the more I am fulfilled with the accumulative knowledge that sustains me.And that is that good and kindness exist and are still encouraging .