If your religion practices shunning, would you ever make exceptions?

Question

Some religions practice a form of "discipline" that amounts to treating a person as if they were essentially dead. Call it what you will -"disfellowshipping," "excommunication," "shunning" - it can mean blocking a person from your life. I have a dear uncle who is married to someone who practices one of these religions. I've just learned he's very ill and in the hospital. To make sure he's given my get-well card, I sent it from another city and had a friend address it so that my aunt didn't recognize my handwriting. She has not spoken to me for the past five years because I quit that religion. When my uncle dies, I will go to his funeral if they have one. My aunt probably won't speak to me. (I would go to her funeral too.) How do you feel about this?

Answer 1

Jehovah's Witnesses practice cruel family wrecking shunning.

"if my family has any contact with me they will be justifying my ungodly lifestyle"

Ring a bell? It's not from the Jehovah's Witnesses it's an excerpt form the discovery channel documentary on 'doomsday cults' describing the practice of the *Roberts group* a disturbing cult.

See all cults like JW's have a shunning shame device to control members.. To be treated like a man of the nations (gentile) or as a tax collector does not mean that i am viewed as 'dead' by my mother.

Everything about the Watchtower's shunning protocol is twisted and demonic.
The shunning by other religions for comparison is irrelevant as the Watchtower claims that it's disfellowshipping is at the direction of the holy spirit so it must be infallible.This is outright blaspheme.

In just one year 1987 i calculated by the Watchtower's own stats that 4.4 men woman and children were disfellowshipped per hour as the world turned on it's axis.

Get this,the Watchtower asserts that every single one was @ "the direction of the holy spirit"
This is utter blaspheme by the watchtower/elder leadership.

How many blasphemes do you charlatans need to be eternally damned?One,or how about 37,000 for that year of 1987?These are wrecked and ruined lives people.

Matthew 18:10 Jesus dire warning to his high ranking apostles;"see to it that you do not despise one of these little ones,for i tell you their angels in heaven always behold the face of my father who is in heaven."

The written and oral directives of the flunky elders is one priority,that is to intimidate and save face with the followers and to stonewall a potential civil lawsuit.

Look either it's the Holy Spirit or it ain't da Holy spirit.They told me even when they are wrong in Judgment i must consider it a test of my faith and bite the bullet.What kind of mealy mouthing gobbledygook is that?

No it's blaspheme!

Tell the truth and don't be afraid-Danny Haszard 'expert witness on the Jehovah Witness' http://www.freeminds.org

Answer 2

Well, I "shun" people in my private life, usually they don't realize that I am though. I am not hostile toward them, I just go out of my way to avoid them.

So I agree with practice to a point, BUT it greatly depends on just what the cause is. Also I have seen this break families apart and again sometimes it is for good cause and is really the best for both parties. Better then not doing it and arguing all the time.

Answer 3

I hv no idea how I would react if I had been brought up to believe that is the way to be. I can only guess that their belief is so strong, they honestly feel shunning is rt. My guess is that they feel that the shunning would convince the one who left to return to their fold. In that sense they r doing it for ur own good. (In their thinking) I hv to commend u, u stated everything in a nice respectful loving way. U dont sound bitter at all. I wish ur aunts religion realized that their is good in ALL religions. Actually I wish ALL religions thought that way! So sorry about ur uncle.

Answer 4

The religions, churchs, and sects that do this obviously are following the example of our Lord toward the lost. (Yes, I am being sarcastic). This is how cults keep their membership. Its the fear tactic. Also, this also ensures that their cattle, oops, I mean their members, will not be exposed to opposing points of view, and therefore not learn the truth. (And yes, I do believe that the top Leadership in these cults have long ago figured out that the whole thing is a con, but with a whole life built around the "job" and financial security at stake-to them , its just a "career" thing.) As far as affecting my own life, although, I myself have never been a member of the Witnesses, I have met hundreds of them. They are a personal ministry. I have had many long and interesting conversations with them in my home in the last 33 years. With regard to "shunning", it is a shameful and unbiblical practice. I know that the Witnesses always like to quote verses that talk about "not eating with such a one", and not having them "in your house". What they dont seem to understand is, the main point of all of these verses is to ensure that we do not "fellowship" with people who are not really brothers in Christ. This means that we dont let them speak "from the pulpit" or teach "bible study classes." (remember the early Church met in HOMES). We are to treat "professing" Christians (but who will not repent) just as if they were UNBELIEVERS. This means, we EVANGELIZE them, not SHUN them. Now how can you evangelize a person that you will not speak to? Personally, I'm happy that the Witnesses do this. (shoot their wounded). It makes MY job of evangelizing these lost souls so much easier. When they meet REAL Christian love shown to them, and contrast it to what they have been receiving from their so called "watchtower friends", they can see how Christ loves them uncondionally through His real people.........theBerean

Answer 5

It is what it is. It's not cool, but really there's nothing you (as an outsider) can do to change it. I think you're doing the right thing, to be there for him when he needs you, and to honor him if and when he dies.

Speaking as someone whose religion practices this, there are good reasons to "shun" someone. We excommunicate people who do things like commit adultery or things like that. It's to protect yourself from them and their self-destruction.
I don't know why you are being "shunned" or whatever. In my church we don't HAVE to stop talking to people just because they leave the Church. For me, that's not enough of a reason to cut off ties.

I am very sorry you are having to go through all of this, and I hope things get better.

Answer 6

That kind of religion isn't a very good one in my opinion. You should always help people and be kind to people even if you disagree with there religion. I can see why your aunt is like this though. If she grew up with that religion and belief then that's the reason why. She's never known anything else. If I were you I would just try to be kind to her no matter what. Even if she ignores you. Just go up and say hello. Maybe she will chnage her mind about you.

Answer 7

How horrible.

I am a Catholic. My own sister-in-law is very anti-Catholic. I adore her. Would I ever shun her? No way.

When Jesus walked this earth, he took a lot of flack for hanging out with those whom the Sadducees and Pharissees felt should be shunned. I follow his example.

I don't drive. I use public transportation. I always enjoy it when the teens all dressed in black all riddled with angst get on the bus. I like to sit next to the ones who are trying to look evil and ask them how their savior is treating them today. I get two reactions. They either react in horror or they bust out laughing and we chatter away until they get off the bus.

It's delightful. I've met some great kids that way.

Answer 8

Dear Suzanne,

No my religion doesn't practice shunning but I just have to answer because my heart breaks for you. And not only my heart but my heavenly Father's heart breaks as well over such things.

What a loving thing that was for you to do!!!

I am hoping that your dear uncle recovers and that our heavenly Father will open your aunt's eyes to the TRUTH.

I hope that your uncle knows the TRUTH even if your aunt does not. I will be praying for both of them and for you as I'm sure many other dear people who read your question will be doing.

For His glory,
JOYfilled

Answer 9

Shunning is hurtful and wrong. I would never turn away from the ones I love. People who do this are just being selfish. Your poor uncle would probably love to see you, but he has to die missing loved ones because his wife cannot think for herself.

Answer 10

It's stupid.
I agree that Christians should avoid people who are actively sinning but that's different than shunning a relative who seems like a nice person.

Jesus taught us to forgive and she is unable to do that. You need to step up to the plate and forgive her.