Ever see this at a funeral?

Question

I am seriously inquiring because the scene was upsetting to my family but I question first if this is a 'new' social trend and I am experiencing it for the first time.

Should or does a member of extended family: An uncle of the deceased, bring into the service their own minister?

The uncle wasn't involved in the deceased life, though he is socially at a higher income level. The uncle brought the minister to the seated attendants and introduced his pastor to each one of them.
The deceased family had a service with their own minister and it was nicely orchestrated.

I have negative feelings about it as I was singled out to be introduced to a minister that I wasn't really interested in meeting, as well as the Uncle seemed to be putting on eirs to me. Was I ignorant to something new?
Educate me.

Answer 1

I don't see how the uncles pastor being there was a bad thing? I men, If he tried to take over the service or something then yeah, oust him but maybe he was just there to support the uncle, I am a minister and I have gone to many funerals of people I didnt know just because it was a family member of someone that I know or am close too and I want to be there to support my friend, and as far as introducing him to people, what is the harm in that? Maybe he wanted people to meet his pastor? Where Im from, funerals tend to be big social gatherings, and most are really big family reunions. I understand that you may not have wanted to meet the man, that your were greiving and didnt want a stranger to greet you, but , really, in the long run, did it hurt you to meet him?

Answer 2

I am not sure which you are upset about. Is it the uncle or the minister? Let me start by saying that I am sorry for your lost and remember that there is no proper way to grieve.
Funerals are for families and friends of the deceased. I go because either that person did mean a lot to me and I want to let the family know that I share in their lost, or one of the family members is my friend I go to show that they mean something to me.
I am assuming that the minister came on behalf of the uncle, and may have even felt as uncomfortable as the family being there. Even if the uncle was not a part of the decease' life they are a part of the family and may be suffering for their sibling losing a child. Believe it or not some people use funerals and weddings to try and get back together with family members and friends that they have grown distant from. Remember there is no proper way to grieve.

Answer 3

It was an invitation to the minister cause that is what his uncle wanted and perhaps the deceased was not saved or attended no church. This happens when that deceased person had no particular pastor sometimes. Also this minister could have socially known him.

Answer 4

This doesn't sound like any new custom to me, at least not a formal custom. It may be a personal custom, though, on the part of the uncle.

It sounds a little strange to me, especially if the "other minister" was brought in as more than a friend of the uncle. If he was brought to the service as a way to "muscle into" the pre-arranged funeral, then I find it extremely rude!

Answer 5

This is definitely not something that happens at every funeral. It sounds like the Uncle was taking advantage of a situation where all the family members would be at one time and in a very vulnerable state, to have them meet his pastor for some unknown reason. Maybe he thought that everybody needed to start going to his church or something. It sounds like there's a hidden agenda somewhere. Most pastor's wouldn't put themselves in this kind of situation where they were knowingly making others feel uncomfortable. The Uncle was the one being ignorant. Sorry for the loss of your loved one, it's never easy.

Answer 6

No, that's not something new. It's happened at a couple of funerals I have attended for my own family. At one, the preacher was there for the distant family that was attending (distant family to me... but closer to the deceased)... the preacher was there to help them get thru the funeral. But at another funeral, the preacher that spoke at my uncles funeral, was a friend of my uncle.... the problem I had with it was that he took that time to try to get converts and to get people who are already Christian to attend his church. It was truly a pathetic sight.

I'm not sure why people do these types of things, but it seems to be pretty normal for most.

Answer 7

Not in good taste, I suppose, but if it brought comfort to the uncle to have his own pastor present at the service, let it be.

Answer 8

I don't think it was appropriate of him to do that. And I don'tthink it's a new trend. It's even disresoectful to the deceased and everyone else. But perhaps his intentions were not all black, always give someone the benefit of the doubt...perhaps he is the ignorant one in the story. My condoleances.

Answer 9

Sounds rude to me. Unless your Uncle was to ask first he should of left his minister at home.

Answer 10

Yup I certainly have many situations, we are all going to die sooner or later or yet another. i think of we ought to constantly be brave and settle for it because of the fact there is no longer something we can do to steer away from it. i replaced into even questioning on how my casket ought to look and how plenty flora i might like.. LOL! yet nonetheless cant help it feeling scared and that i basically panic yet attempt to no longer think of approximately it generally. Altough I certainly have observed that those toughts come to my head while im attempting to nod off and is silent and no one is around..