What should I do if a JW or a Mormon knocks on my door?

Question

My fiance thinks I should tell them to go away, but I would rather invite them in for stimulating discussion until they run out screaming in holy terror.

Any other ideas?

Answer 1

I answer the door naked. I'm not unattractive, so they tend to get a little "uncomfortable", if you know what I mean. They usually turn around and leave immediately. Sometimes, when I'm feeling particularly rascally, I just answer the door with a butcher knife and ask if they are here for the sacrifice.

Answer 2

The best way to learn what to do to stop JWs is to contact a synagogue and talk to the Rabbi.

Ask him how the ancient Jews got rid of the Christian Jews when they went from house to house telling their brethren that the beliefs, rituals, and holiday observances that they have followed for hundreds of years was no longer valid?

I’m sure they had ways to get rid of the Jews, who from their point of view, was a cult started by a Uneducated, Jewish Lower Class Carpenter, who was executed for cause by the governing authority. The only education he got was from his low class parents, Mary and Joseph. These followers were also uneducated Jewish lower class individuals, such as Peter, a failed fisherman, and Matthew, a hated tax collector.

Lacking any kind of education, let alone advance religious education, it was clear they were easily brainwashed into believing that the uneducated ex-carpenter was somehow the Messiah, which was clearly false as it was commonly known that when the Messiah came, he would destroy (Armageddon) the enemies of the true people of God, as foretold.

Saul of Tarsus, a highly educated individual in the religious arts, repeatedly proved they were a false religious sect and cult, creating their own scriptures (Bible) instead of relying on the Holy Torah, which had been used by the Jews for hundreds of years. Saul often stood by as the true believers of God stoned these so-called Christians for their door to door activities and spreading of false doctrine.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saul_of_Tarsus

Now, I would not recommend stoning, but they may have had other methods that worked to stop the house to house work and the spreading of false doctrine . What worked for them against the Christian cult may work against the JWs. At least you will be in good company in doing so.

Answer 3

When the JW's come to my door, I offer them a copy of the Book of Mormon and tell them I'll read their literature if they read mine.

And, I know it's not right, but the one about meeting them at the door naked, with a butcher knife, and asking if they are there for the sacrifice is really funny!

Answer 4

I would politely just be honest with them. You have a right to tell them to leave. It is your home. Plus, every-ones time is of importance, so it's better they don't waist their time, or yours. But have you ever wondered why J. W. keep coming by? I know for one thing, it is because they have something to share that is important. Or they wouldn't be coming by so often. They are just trying to find honest hearted people, who might like to learn more about God's word the Bible. It is a life saving work to them, so it is a very important job to go preaching. These J.W. get alot of bad comments, and mistreatment, but they still lovingly go out and preach.
So even though we all have rights to believe what we want, and rights to talk to whom we want, we want to be peaceable of all men, no matter what religion, or creed. For we never know if one day we may need serious help, and the only one their could be some one we don't like or have treated meanly.

Answer 5

Your fiance's option is the direct route. It is like placing yourself on the "Do Not Call List". It may or may not work!

Your option will quickly get you blacklisted by those organizations! A few sessions of that, and they will NEVER knock on your door again. It worked for us: they cross the street to avoid our house!

One very simple option: place a sign on your door or your gate saying "No Solicitors" or "No Missionaries", or something like that. Anybody walking past the sign is guilty of trespassing, and can be cited by the local constable.

Answer 6

Call them hunny or sweetie. The Mormon missionaries hate that.

Get a good anti-mormon DVD and tell them you'll watch their DVD if they watch yours first. Then make sure they watch it with you.

Jeff Foxworthy has a joke saying that he draws a chalk outline of a body on the front sidewalk and then scatters JW and Mormon tracts by it.

You can tell them that most of your moms are mormon and you think its Sally's turn with dad tonight, she's the 4th wife.

You can tell the JW's that you love to drink blood and offer them corn sryup w/red food coloring in it, as it looks like blood.

Answer 7

If your really not interested in anything they say, then say so.

Otherwise listen, take notes and have a meaningful discussion about the Bible. John 17:3 tells us to take in knowledge about God and Christ, it means our everlasting life!!

I'm sure there is a lot on your mind. Perhaps questions you have never had answered.

Why not ask - Seek and you shall find!

It would be interesting to see who gives you the most accurate answer from the Bible!

Answer 8

Well if you really want to have an intelligent discussion, then go ahead, otherwise just politely send them on their way.

Answer 9

Ask them why they deny the Goddess when she has been around in so many forms for so long. You could list examples of ancient deities, like Demeter, Diana, Isis, etc... You could say that there is more evidence for a goddess and god (pair) than there is for their God. (which there is)

Or you can try to convert them to Satanism. I don't even know what you'd do for that one. You could probably make stuff up, though.

Either way, it'd be an interesting way to scare them away.

Answer 10

For JW's all they are really interested in is getting people to read the Bible. Tell them you read it, and you are a church goer (I don't know if you are, but whatever) and they'll wish you a good day and move on.
For Mormon missionaries, they want to talk to you about the Book of Mormon. Politely tell them you're not interested, and if they keep talking tell them you are happy with your church and you're trying to be nice because you know they have a hard time, and people are incredibly rude. You don't want to be that way, but you just aren't interested. They should respect that and move on.

Oh, and be careful if you invite the Mormons in. Many of us are totally not afraid of whatever you dish out. We find you as entertaining as you find us (and as weird).