If I find myself only being fulfilled by binging on certain foods, then what else can I fill the void with?

Question

I have depression, anxiety and lots of free time. I try writing, doesn't always help. I've tried exercising, that's a laugh. I still do it, but it's not making me feel better. Music isn't working anymore. I have almost no friends left. I have no one to talk to except my therapist I see every other week. But still isn't much. I don't know what to do. It's not like I have anything to binge since I am in the dorm. But I just hate feeling like this. I just want to feel better...

Yes, it scares me. It only leaves me feeling more lonely and hopeless.

Answer 1

You can talk to me online my IM is djtrancendance...I know it sounds weird just giving it out but I know how you feel I was in a depression like that about 3 years ago coming out of college.

Far as the food problem...you're probably just using that to boost your level of "feel good" endorphin hormones...note it's like a drug the more you eat the more it takes to get the same boost.

Writing and music and exercise fail eventually (I know, I did all three during my depression...they all contribute to giving you more energy, which often eventually becomes negative)....getting into a relationship often only results in you ditching it once you feel better then fall back down later (or just gets you obsessed with someone who hurts you).

As a follow-up to an answer above, looking good and getting "made-up" can help, but not if you do it too suddenly...think about it if you come out dressed like a model but look like you just got dumped, it looks quite fake and might make you think you are getting ignored for your looks not (the real issue) your confidence.
On the other hand, if you say hi and ask people about their hobbies, giving an air of confidence and challenge (IE asking them to challenge you at a game/sport you are good at)...and then dress the part when meeting them...you are much more likely to get a positive response.


You just have to do what you think makes you stronger. That can be as simple as telling someone who makes fun of you that you won't take his/her crap. Stick with the people who have the same attitude as to what you should do...your real friends will say the people who are ditching you are just dogs.

Don't say you're sorry for things you know deep down are not your fault...look at the world thinking "I am worth it...and unless you can prove me wrong you need to back off...and who knows, when you get by your shortsightedness and learn of my respectable ability, you may well grow to respect maybe even like me."

Fill the void with statements and actions of individuality and people who value that highly. Respect yourself and you will eventually find people who will deeply respect you.

Answer 2

Have you tried volunteering? It sounds like you've got so much time on your hands that all you can do is sit and stew. You might find other people's problems as interesting as your own -- go out and give it a try. Keep up with the music and the exercise -- and try and treat yourself to those certain foods fairly often so you don't have to binge.

What does your therapist say about your feelings? You may not like his/her advice, but it'd be worth a shot.

There's a saying -- fake it until you make it. Maybe if you can fake feeling happy for a little bit, you will feel a little better. Works for me, anyway.

P.S. I can sympathize with how scary it is to make contact with people -- but the rewards are really worth it. Start slow. Maybe your adviser can give you some ideas for tutoring younger students, or volunteering at some job that will help you in your field.

Which is scarier, though -- becoming lonelier and more depressed, or the chance that someone might say something hurtful? Only you can change this. Your therapist can only guide you.

Answer 3

I have been through a similar situation not too long ago that I fully recovered from, I think, after many weeks...one thing that I found helped was putting yourself out there...wake up in the morning and do your hair, put on make up, accessorize. Wear matching earrings and necklace sets...and go out. Say hi to people that walk by you....surprisingly, sometimes people will stop for a quick chat and that alone will boost your self-esteem immensely....It's amazing....and also don't forget to smile...sometimes smiling not only catches other people's attention, it also makes you feel wonderful! Hope this helps.

Answer 4

Practise the relaxation techniques at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris on page 2; read that page, and page 6, then view the tips at the mental-health-abc & conquering stress websites. I have another method in the blogs of shaneris (shan eris) at www.myspace.com on "tackling depression", which has a smorgasboard of treatments. Snack on celery sticks & carrot sticks & cucumber slices in any vinegar: eat 6 small meals daily, preceded 20 mins by a glass of water. Have small amounts of your "binge foods" only: if you can't - buy a small packet & give the rest away (don't just dump them, unless flushed down the toilet).

Answer 5

Have you ever actually tried going into the void?
What is there in the emptiness may be a fullness you never knew was there.