Where do I belong????

Question

I have recently lost a friend to suicide. I am fearful for his soul and mine as well. I have been a non practicing Christian for several years and do not have set beliefs. I fear for myself due to the fact that I have been suicidal in the past and now I wonder if there was anything that I could have done to change his mind and I question why I would want to kill myself. I have seen how many lives he touched and how his family hurt because his death. After he left us, I started wondering if his soul was transferred to another being, or if he is in a purgatory state. Due to the fact that I had these feelings myself, I am having pain, mostly in the head (he shot himself in the head), I cry more often, and no words offer comfort to me. I am seeking answers to my fears and I wonder which belief structure suits me. Does anyone have an idea? As much, does anyone know any books that may offer comfort to my ideas and fears? Thank you

Answer 1

First off, suicide, is not an ending, or an escape, because this world we live in is not the end, this is only the beginning.
My father killed himself, when I was 13, and it seems really painful at first, and you never get over it, but a drastic solution does not solve anything.
God put each and everyone of us here, because, we ARE HIS CHILDREN, He LOVES us even more than our own parents ever could, He created us, We are His, I Know things are hurting, but that is this world, it is still in Sin, everywhere we turn, I believe God will never give us so much that we cannot bare, especially when we talk directly to The Lord.
We are not going to have it easy, we have to face trials and tribulations along the way, but we must look forward to the plans The Lord has for us, and they are Greater than anyone in this world could ever anticipate,We have to trust, have FAITH, and BELIEVE, Because Our Father is always watching over us, and as far as a soul goes after you die, I believe it is in Rest until JesusChrist returns, read Revelations in the Bible, It says that The dead will rise as Jesus did, then we will face judgement, If You know The Lord and accept the Lord into your life, You will be saved.

Answer 2

I feel for your loss - and no, there was probably nothing you could've done to change his mind. His soul and eternal destiny are in God's hands; not knowing your friend, I would have no idea whether he would be in heaven or not. I know that the Bible does not teach either re-incarnation or purgatory, but that God is gracious and merciful. Entrust that the Lord will be both loving and just with your friend.

I am more concerned about YOU. Being that you are a "non-practicing Christian without any set beliefs", your grief must be beyond the pale. It is only through my own Christian faith and the sure hope of eternal life that allows me to cope with such tragedies. I have found great comfort in the words of Jesus found in John 14:

“Don’t let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me. There is more than enough room in my Father’s home. If this were not so, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you? When everything is ready, I will come and get you, so that you will always be with me where I am. And you know the way to where I am going.”
“No, we don’t know, Lord,” Thomas said. “We have no idea where you are going, so how can we know the way?”
Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me. ""

I could recommend some books to read, but what you really need is the comfort only provided by the Holy Spirit. Please, go to your church and to your pastor -allow them to provide the peace and love that you so desperately crave right now.

Know that many of the Christians on Y!A will be praying for you.

Answer 3

Hey.

Too much sadness these days.....

Well, here is what the Bible says about the soul:

(Ezekiel 18:4) . . .The soul that is sinning—it itself will die.

Ok and we all sin...

(Romans 5:12) 12 That is why, just as through one man sin entered into the world and death through sin, and thus death spread to all men because they had all sinned—.

So if the soul does not live on.... and we all sin... then what is the condition of the dead??

(Ecclesiastes 9:5) . . .For the living are conscious that they will die; but as for the dead, they are conscious of nothing at all, neither do they anymore have wages, because the remembrance of them has been forgotten.

I don't know if you have heard the account of Jesus' friend Lazarus.... Jesus likened his being dead to sleeping.

(John 11:11-14) . . .He said these things, and after this he said to them: “Laz′a·rus our friend has gone to rest, but I am journeying there to awaken him from sleep.” 12 Therefore the disciples said to him: “Lord, if he has gone to rest, he will get well.” 13 Jesus had spoken, however, about his death. But they imagined he was speaking about taking rest in sleep. 14 At that time, therefore, Jesus said to them outspokenly: “Laz′a·rus has died,

So?? That it??

(Acts 24:15) . . .and I have hope toward God, which hope these [men] themselves also entertain, that there is going to be a resurrection of both the righteous and the unrighteous.

So we can have hope..... and comfort from God's Word.

Email if you want to discuss further?

Mike.

Answer 4

Sorrow is a very painful thing and like a broken leg prevents walking the pain of sorrow prevents soul from making the right moves. The only worse state than sorrow is woe as described in the scripture. If you were a practicing Christian before, Christ will never leave or forsake you, so you should get alone and pray. God loves you and one of his names in the scripture is the Comforter go to him and get comfort and rest in his love. I would go to a local Salvation Army and talk with the minister there as they help people who are hurting spiritually as well as they help with material things.
I will remember you in my prayers tonight because I remember the pain when my son was killed but I had God for my comforter,

Answer 5

I am sorry to hear about your friend. At the same time I must say that shopping around for a belief system as you call it will not help you. Would you be satisfied with other people's wishful thinking? I wouldn't.

My advice is to go to the Source directly with an open heart. When is the last time you actually let the Bible speak for itself? Why not ask God Himself to guide you? Those who seek, find. Do you remember the prodigal son? God hasn't changed, He's been waiting for you with open arms. Perhaps this experience is His wake up call that will cause you to draw near to Him.

Best regards,

jack

Answer 6

Bless your heart that is such an awful thing to go through. I had someone extremely close to me kill themselves and it is so tough to get through. It's sad that he thought that was his only way out. It leaves so many unanswered questions for family and friends. And so many what if's so to speak. I have to be honest and say I'm in fear for his soul as well. No one knows for sure all we can do is hope and pray he made it in. Crying more often and being depressed is normal for such an occasion. You said you are seeking answers to your fears and I wish I knew of more uplifting things to say but the truth is..we don't know. Jesus is the only one that knows. As for yourself, if you start having those feelings please, I beg of you, please talk to someone. Go find a clergymember, or a family member. Go talk to a counselor if you want but please talk to someone. More importantly, talk to Jesus. He can help you far more than what I can. And let me tell you hon that you are so important. Your a special wonderful person that God put on this planet for a reason. He has a plan. Take care of yourself and please, email me and let me know how your doing. I'll be wondering and praying for you. If I can do anything to help please don't hesitate to contact me.

Answer 7

oh hun if you were here i would wrap you up in a big bear hug and we would sit drinkin hot chocolate and you could pour your heart out to me. I know you must be aching something awful. But I know that is not possible, so there is another option: Jesus.

He has always been there for you, will always be there for you and IS there for you right now. You can talk to Him! He wants and longs for you to become one of His children! He loves ya so much He died for you. He died for me. He died for everyone. Because he LOVES us more than anything in the world! I can understand you having pain more often, and crying often, and no words comfort you. It's natural. But I have good news! If your friend was EVER a Christian, like you, at ANY time in his life, He is in Heaven. Even if he decided-no never mind-God's not real-i believe that he may have let go of Christ, but Christ didnt let go of him! but wait-that's not all.
I can give you a gauranteed way of getting into Heaven and spending all eternity with Jesus Christ-the Savior of the World. Just 3 steps. here they are-http://www.labc.com/children/page.php?id=162
This is the best choice you could EVER make in your life. it's also the most important. No matter what other's say-it's the right choice. And this wont mean you wont have pain in your life or suffering-but to help our pain and suffering-we turn to Christ for strenghth. He will not give us a test that is beyond what we can bear. You can bear this-it will get better-maybe not soon, but it will get better. and if you make the choice to become a real Christian, it will make you feel better to know that you are LOVED. you are loved by Christ, and me. but the most important one is Christ.

Your friend was not re-incarnated. nor is he in a purgatory state. He is waiting for judgement day. whether he was ready or not-when Jesus comes back-will you be?

Much love in Christ-hopefully soon i can call you my sis in Christ!

Rachel

ps.if you ever need to talk, just email me-im always here. and so is God.


-and yes-there is a Hell. and no-suicide is NEVER the answer-please do not believe that. PLEASE.

Answer 8

You express yourself well.
Suicide is often looked upon as a weak way out.
No.
It is not to be recommended, however, in some cases it is understandably a sad answer.
Do not overly concern yourself with what you could have said, or done.
At the moment, he is now non-existant.
Death is non-existance.
There is no fiery torment in hell.
That is a lie.
The dead are conscious of absolutely nothing.
Ecclesiastes 9:5
Your friend is not suffering.
Jesus taught the resurrection. That means a "re-making."
There will come a time when the resurrection starts.
Your friend will be re-made, resurrected.
He will have the opportunity to be part of what is mentioned in Psalm 37:29.
You willl too.

Answer 9

I think you need to understand that you are grieving. Your feelings are perfectly normal, and felt by a lot of people in your situation at one time or another.

Elizabeth Kubler-Ross' book, "On Death and Dying." explains five stages of grief. We go through all these stages, but not always in the same order, and not always in the same length of time.

The five stages are:

1. Denial and Isolation.
2. Anger.
3. Bargaining.
4. Depression.
5. Acceptance.

I hope you get to feeling better. I hope this helps. Good luck.

Answer 10

You are in shock, which is normal after a traumatic event like this. I would urge you to talk to someone you trust, or a counselor.

I suggest that you do not look for a belief system now. Until you understand yourself and what you need, this belief may not support you when you need it most urgently.