I think you all are used to me and my marriage crises by now. However for those of you whom are reading this for the first time, my hubby and I have been unhappily married for 11 months and have consumated our relationship only once because he lives in Atlanta and I in New York temporarily until my contract at work expires this Summer. In the meantime, he has stated that the reasons why he's been elusive is due to my weight gain and lack of culinary skills. My self-esteem has hit an all time low and I am trying to regain it back because I know that I am a good looking woman whom can cook and take very good care of my persoanl appearance.
2007-05-01 07:54:41 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I recently was released for a bad situation and I had to look back and see what I saw in myself before I had met my ex....
Look back to the good things YOU KNOW about yourself and things people have always told you weather it was your eyes or your smile.... Think about ALL THOSE people and honestly would you believe his lies and comments over people you TRULY value and trust thier opinions... It is not easy but then again HEALING never is... He burned your skin but that is ALL he did.. wear that scar with the pride of survival and Do NOT let it touch your soul...Best of luck and prayers with you always
2007-05-01 08:06:16 · answer #1 · answered by mandie_j_lee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't listen to a word he is saying. I am sure you are a beautiful women who does not deserve to be treated like this- Men have absolutely no right to have the power our self-esteem. NONE! You can save yourself before it is too late. My best friend has the same problem but she won't leave her husband because of religious reasons. Her self esteem is so far gone i have never seen a person so vulnerable, hurt, and sad (she used to be the happiest - bubbliest person i knew). Get yourself some ear plugs and don't listen to any man that comments on your cooking- and your figure- because it is your's not his. Get away while you can- you deserve better- every women does. You deserve to be happy and you need to do what you can to get yourself to where YOU are happy with YOU! So here is what you do; find yourself a really sexy dress that YOU look good in get a bottle of wine-and a cheesecake-light some candels and sit down on your couch and don't answer the phone when he calls.
2007-05-01 08:27:48 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first step to getting your confidence back is realizing it isn't there. Do you have a best friend? Anyone your close too. Start small, go out with them and get your nails done, vent to her. Remember who you are. Do things for yourself that make you feel good.
2007-05-01 07:59:53 · answer #3 · answered by mlsherratt 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him and then forget him. How long are you going to let him run your life? How long are you going to let him own your mind? The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over, while expecting a different result. Ben Franklin said that. While he was cheating on his wife.
.
2007-05-01 08:03:05 · answer #4 · answered by Kacky 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you must not give the little voices inside you the fuel to keep burning their negative fire. they are merely echoes of the things he has said to make you feel less significant. in this way, he will make you his emotional captive as long as you are under this spell. he will try to make you feel like the only one that can love you is him, and if he is saying those things, you must realize that he is not saying them out of love for you. it should be obvious that those aren't loving words at all!
reassure yourself that you are beautiful, and that there are plenty of people who would appreciate your culinary aptitude. pay no mind to the voices that try to hold you down in that negative state. if you don't listen to them, their strength to be heard will die away. rise above!
i hope everything works out for the best.
2007-05-01 08:13:39 · answer #5 · answered by Robert 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seems like you guys need if counseling...if you're not already going! It seems like you know you're attractive and have good things to bring the table...but it seems like your husband doesn't know. Maybe he's insecure with some things that he's lacking. Either way...your husband should never put you down like that! NEVER!
2007-05-01 07:59:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like some counseling is in order.
2007-05-01 07:58:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋