Where I live there is arranged marriage. Originally my daughter was meant to marry a man named Sirtaj but I dont know. He is very mean to women and abuses his mother. Yesterday a generous man gave me a pack of gum and asked if he could marry my daughter. I didnt know what to say. He looked nicer than Sirtaj but he was really ugly and had a large tumor on his neck. She cant decide for herself because women dont have opinions here but I need someones help helping me decide for her
2007-05-01 05:53:34 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I think you can find a better guy for your daughter...
because marriage is whole life... not few years...
and i know about arragaed marriage because my husband is india and i am chinese and i know about his culture...
so you have to let your daughter choice and to see if she let either guy or not because you do not wanted to ruin her life.. to send her off to wrong marriage...
Just pick another guy or ask your friends or cousin or someone match maker...
2007-05-01 05:58:02 · answer #1 · answered by babyg 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if neither of u can decide don't let her get married. Apparently the real man for her has not appeared yet. If u love ur daughter let love come to her, it's nice when we experience love on our own, with all due respect I don't agree with arranged marriages because u don't fall in love with the person for whom they are, you r forced to love a man. Neither of these men sound right for ur daughter, the first might abuse her and the second one doesn't mean he's nice because he bought a pack of gum for u. Love come to all of us soon and the right way, how can u force someone into marriage when there is no type of attraction?
2007-05-01 06:39:58 · answer #2 · answered by grissy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A matter of fact. The signs are clear. God tell you both are not the man. How can you marry your daughter to one that abuses woman? How can you marry your daughter to one that have disease and may die from the tumor and make your daughter a widow. When the right guy is there, you will know.
2007-05-01 06:03:33 · answer #3 · answered by Lairbit 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously you love your daughter and want the best for her......that is why you are not sure of Sirtaj.
I am not from the same back ground and have freedom to choose who i marry.... something i am very grateful for.
I can only imagine that it must be scary not having the right to an opinion especially about something so special and important like marriage.
I think that the best way to choose is to keep your daughter's best interest in mind, remembering that she's relying on you to make that choice for her and she will have to be with this person for the rest of her life.
Chi Chi x.
2007-05-01 06:10:58 · answer #4 · answered by Chi Chi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it saddens me to hear "women don't have opinions here", trust me, we do, wherever we are, whether her opinion matters to you, that's your choice.
i don't know much about 'arranged' marriages, why was this Sirtaj chosen in the first place? did anyone know how he treats people/women? and why would you think your daughter should marry a nice man who happened to give you a pack of gum? what do you know about him? his family.
if anything, keep your daughter FAR AWAY from Sirtaj, as a father (regardless of nationality), you should want a man that will treat your daughter and your future grandchildren with love and tenderness and respect. i'm sure you're a good man, and you want your daughter to be happy, it is as they say "happily ever after, sickness and health", not 'miserably to the end of time, between visits to the emergency room'.
2007-05-01 06:04:48 · answer #5 · answered by SunEvents 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
ok, although I don't agree with your beliefs and arranged marriages, I'll still give you my opinion, she should marry the one who offered gum. He is a gentlemen. Do you want your daughter to be beaten by her husband the rest of her life?? So what if he is not that good looking? Looks fade with age. Besides, the more you like someone's personality, then become more and more attractive. It's the inside that counts.
2007-05-01 06:00:39 · answer #6 · answered by AMS 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you see that the man named Sirtaj is cruel and mean, especially to his mother, why would you even consider still allowing your daughter to marry this person. If this other man will be kind and caring to your daughter wouldn't you want her to live a life of caring and kindness rather than beatings and cruelty? I pray you make the right decision for your daughter. God Bless.
2007-05-01 06:09:28 · answer #7 · answered by tersey562 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you can. I know of a couple of people who have done that and if you think that person is the right one then go for it. Personally, I would avoid marrying someone who I'm related to.
2016-05-18 00:46:12 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to choose the nicer of the two men for your daughter. Could you honestly sit back and watch Sirtaj beat your daughter. The beating would ruin her. Please make the right choice because no woman no matter where in the world she lives should have to go through abuse of any sort. Good luck on your choice and good luck to your daughter.
2007-05-01 06:00:52 · answer #9 · answered by Annette R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well who do you think would be better for her, most likely not the man who is mean to women and his own mother, because if you have her marry him you will always fear for her and her future family, if you had a good feeling about the man you gave you a pack of gum, then go with him , BUT GO WITH THE ONE YOU WON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT HER BEING WITH
2007-05-01 05:59:40 · answer #10 · answered by Aflac2345 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋